100% FREE ONLINE DATING
sponsored links
| Topic: Headlines that hit the chuckle button | |
|---|---|
|
|
|
We all know that there are serious headlines and advertisements, but here are a few that should put a smile on your face.
In a Sports Magazine: Student Excited Dad Got A Head Job! Advertisment; GET 50% OFF. or Half Price. Whichever is less. Tiger Woods Plays with own Bälls Says NIKE On a Teenage Problem Page: Teenage Pregnancy drops off significantly after age 25 Question of the day: Question- What contitutes a Millionaire? Answer: A Millionaire is someone who has $1,000,000 according to Jerry Beto Branch Manager and Senior Vice President of AG Edwards and Sons. One Armed Man Applauds the Kindness of Strangers. ARMY VEHICLE DISSAPPEARS! An Australian army vehicle has dissappeared after being painted with camouflage paint! THEFT: A woman in the 1900 Block of 129th Street Northeast reported Oct. 15 that someone must have stolen her mail, because she did not recieve birthday cards from some of her friends. Debra Jackson said she likes shopping at Dollar Palace because it's convenient and casual, 'It's not as if I'm going to Walmart or something' She stated. Alton Attorney Accidently sues himself. CORRECTION: Due to incorrect information received from the Clerk of Courts Office, Dianne K Merchant was incorrectly listed as being fined for prostitution in Wednesdays paper. The charge should have been Failure to stop at a railroad crossing. The Public Opinion apologises for the error. Caskets found as workers demolish Mauseleum. Utah Poison Control Center reminds everyone not to take poison. **************************************************************** Police Report: Crack found in mans buttocks. 911 calls: 12.35am - Caller reports hitting a man in the head with an axe. Notes that 'Intruder' was in the mirror. 1.33pm Sonora - A man came to the Sheriffs Department to find out how to legally kill a person who was harrassing him. A caller reported at 7.14pm that someone was on a porch yelling 'Help' from a residence on Bank Street. Officers responded and learned the person was callinga cat that is named 'Help' 2.58pm The Learning Center on Hanson Street reports a man across the way stands at his window for hours watching the Parents Center making visitors nervous. Police ID the suspect as a cardboard cutout of Arnold Schwarzenegger. Dog Attack: Lower Pond Lithia Park Ashland: Police responded to a report of two dogs running loose and attacking ducks at about 11.20am. Sunday. The officer cited the resident for the loose dogs. The ducks refused medical treatment and left the area according to police records. ***************************************************************** FULL SIZE MATTRESS: Royal Tonic. 20 Year Warranty. Like New. Slight Urine smell. $40 Tel. (818)222...... Wanted: Somebody to go back in time with me. This is NOT a joke. P.O. Box 322 Oakview. You'll get paid after we get back. Must bring your own weapons. Safety not guaranteed. I have only done this once before. Human Skull: Used once only. Not plastic. $200 Tel. (814)465..... 1995 NISSAN Maxima. Green leather, loaded, CD Auto start, 4 door, sunroof, Good condition $4500 Not for sale. Tombstone: Standard Grey. A good buy for someone named Grady. $200 (508)785...[color=blue{b]  
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
lol-thanks for sharing
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
