I'm watching folks my parents age who snap and snarl at each other, and who are quite frankly happier to be apart from each other, even married.

Then I look at people in the 20's who are so desparate to be with someone, they'll settle for anything.

Discussions with people tend to be idiotic and degrade into talks of sex. Sorry to say, that gets really boring after a while.

There doesn't seem to be much in the way of simple respect anymore.

So, how does one reconcile the good and bad of what one sees in relationships?

Well first of all U are one SUPER lady!! I have came to learn that we cant control others, just ourselves. U have a heart of gold and U just have to accept that U have to make YOU happy!! My family has spats all the time and I just figure its part of life!! Kendra U are so awesume in every way, just do what U can do to make others happy and U will have succeded in doing all U could do!!

I think it is the whole resource of love.
It gets you by the bad times, when nothing else
will work. You fall back on it, and the world
moves on.

Older folks have settled in the groove, locked into
patterns they have spent years building.
I can remember my grandmother, forever screaming at
my grandfather, 'Good nightshirt John, pay attention
to me!'
And my grandfather would turn off his hearing aid.

I don't know ED, it takes two for mutual respect.
For myself, if I am involved with someone, I have
already sorted the bad like the dirty laundry..I DO it,
because needs must. I accept it because I accept
the package as a whole.

Methinks sometimes people learn to hate the very thing
they started out loving. Because they can. Maybe it is
the only emotion that makes them feel..involved still.

So...when is sex?

If your talking about my own relationships I would have to say depends how much I invested in it.If theres a lot of time involved and it does'nt come up against my tolerances I would talk it out .Otherwise I'm gone .Course this is comeing from someone who has lived what you are talkin about !

after spending 50 years with the same person (as in the case of my parents recent anniversary), they do tend to get on your nerves and some space and private time is definatly very appealing...

The younger you are the more dooms-day about everything, if you are single today and single tomorrow then that can only mean you are going to be single for the rest of your life

I guess its a matter of finding the balance between being there for your partner and being there for yourself..I was in a LTR for 14 years and when I discovered I could no longer tell where I ended and the other one began I decided it was time to leave and find myself again. some would say that was very selfish of me, and Im sure they are right...but I needed to do it and I have no regrets.

in my relationship

its a learning experience
and through the learning comes
the growth
the growth of two individuals
loving one another
Respecting and trusting one another

giving and taking for and with
one another

when true freindship is there then
love is also there

and work must be done at all times
to hold it all together
through the good and the bad

then you become old
hold hands
and smile

because it all paid off

You are a sweetie, Mikey.

The problem is spats have endings. A lot of what I'm seeing now is an ongoing, day after day after day thing, months at a time.

Groans...

Well all U can do is what is within your reach and the rest will have to play itself out!! Believe me, I have been through it and U cant change things that others dont wanna change!!

Mom did that with dad. They celebrated 37 yrs in Aug. 2 days before, she walked up and told him she was tired of his ******** and attitude, and while she loved him, she wasn't going to put up with it for the rest of her life. If he was so miserable and wanted out, he needed to make a decision. He was good for a month.

After a while, it doesn't look enjoyable or even comfortable. It looks downright perpetually miserable for everyone involved.

As I have stated before, there are worse things than being alone.