so yeah..ive been with my boyfriend for about 4 months now,but due to his bad luck ive only seen him rarely hes gotten in 2 wrecks,i gave him a concussion he had traffic school and he works on the weekend.he asked me to marry him but i have decided to but the wedding and marrying him on hold.i dont have any ties with him,what i mean i dont have a kid with him i dont share bills with him and im in no way supporting him financially.

in my opinion there is nothing him making him stay around at all he is always calling me and i talk to him everyday,but my friends around me are having their doubts and understandably so.but like many Americans im out of a job and looking for someone so i can meet him half way,hes talked about getting me a cellphone so its either to keep in contact with me.

im also thinking that no relationship is perfect or easy and when im able to get a job we can take turns seeing each other..and yes i really did give him a concussion..i want to believe if i just stay patient and we both keep working at it well make it hes even said that we've been through alot and its made our relationship stronger,but im getting a lil tired of defending the relationship from family and friends who i know mean well..

been through a lot huh?

does he mean the ENTIRE 4 months you have been a couple?

why would you even consider this? you say you rarely see him so i'm guessing you don't really know each other very well.

take your time, have a real relationship with him "before" you move up to a marriage.

ive been friends with him for a while..so i think hes counting to when he asked me out a week before july and up til now lol

but people say i should just drop him altogether..its not his fault hes got crappy luck.

i'm not saying drop him. i'm just suggesting that you not get married simply to be married.

take that step as a serious one and make sure that he is really the one you cannot live without. get to know him and learn what a relationship with him will really be like. otherwise, the next step you will be asking about is whether or not you should be getting a divorce.

yeah i know what youre saying i say back and i said to myself that this is the wrong way to do things i dont want to get a divorce as soon as i got married i told him that even though i told him yes,that i think we should put things on hold and slow it down a bit..

but i we havent spend enough time together to know if were made for each other..

Damn, bee.


I would definately hold off on the marriage deal, at least
until 6-8 months of quite a bit more time together and getting
to know each other a lot better. As for dumping him for bad
luck? That's ridiculous. I can't believe anyone would even say
that to you, that's not a reason to not care for and be with
someone. If you guys get along good, care for each other and
treat each other well, and are committed to seeing each other
through good times AND bad, you'll make it through to the other
side. Things will get better with time, both personally and
together.

lol Indigo


oh i forgot to add the weekend after he came and see me he got sick and got ulcers on his throat..


like so much crazy stuff has happened we have only spent 3 days together but we talk everyday.so im confused on people telling me to leave him

well hes gotta work he cant just take off and relationships no matter how weird if they are worth it take work!

everyone is different, some marry within two weeks and have a lifelong marriage, others court for two years and divorce within two weeks after marriage

for my tastes, four months is too soon,

its not truly a balanced idea of the relationship if you have mostly had ROUGH times(where you clinged to each other for some need) or if you have had mostly GREAT times (where you havent faced any real obstacles together)

I think its best to have a real good idea of who you are dealing with in BOTH types of situations,, good or bad, before making a lifetime commitment

yes,well the so called wedding was planned for next year and he treats me well dont get me wrong but i decided sense im not good in relationships and i tend to pick the wrong guy i wanted to take it slow.

my friend said that maybe he feels stuck in the relationship and is unsure how to leave bc hes been gone every weekend (he lives 3 hours away) he works on nascar engines and his job requires him to work weekends and travel a lot of the time

and i really dont see how getting a concussion[which i caused] getting a speeding ticket and spending a few weekends in traffic school oh and not to mention getting sick for 2 weeks and he wreck the same car twice is his fault.

crappy luck yes,he still makes my heart skip a beat when the phone rings i know its dumb to say if we havent spent that much time together,but like i tell my friends NOTHING IS MAKING HIM STAY WITH ME.

msharmony

wait? you said you have been together for what 4months
but yet only have spent 3 days together (is that total)
i would truly have to say you have truly have to wait i would give it a year
my mom was married to my dad for 21yrs before they got divorced and she still says doesnt matter how long you know the guy deep down you truly dont know him..

i was with my ex hubby(bf at the time) about 2weeks when he ask me to marry him.. we got married 2yrs later. but guess what i kicked him out of the house 4 differnt times (why) he was cheating, and others things. we wernt even together for our 1st annerversary

hey Queene123

yes i know yes u read that correct we have spent a total of 3 days together we have been friends for a while but a lot happened to him he got sick for 2 weeks had driving school i gave him a concussion he got in a wreck coming here and coming back from an engine run and his job requires him to work many weekends when they get busy!

then i would deffently wait on the marriage for quit sometime
give it 2yrs if you feel you need that time

for i wouldnt even consider that a relationship for you only have seen each other a total of 3 days..

there was a guy that i met on here its been about 2yrs
and he lived about a hour away. but he gave nothing but excuse.
we were together 7months. i only saw him 5 times..
i didnt feel we truly had a relationship
when i finally broke up with him it was over email
no big deal to me

i had a feeling he met someone else before i broke up with him, but i could had been wrong, but he did actually meet someone a few days after. for i had sent him a sarcastic email about something and he he mention his gf.. (no big deal to me)

yeah thats what confuses me he did ask me out and all that but then again i haven't seen him sense july but i think its not his fault..i think he just has crappy luck..

the crazy part is..this is the most healthiest relationship ive ever been in i think if not for him getting sick and getting that concussion id have seen him more often

if you really love him,you'll buy him a helmet.....

lol i saw waiting from a smart-arsed reply from you JT!


yeah thats basically what he said,..we both agreed that i can only try and kill him every 6 months[kidding]

you can always count on me for that

well i would be dissapointed if you didn't!

Guys, lets quit trying to candy coat this. I will say what a lot of us are thinking. I want to say with the up most respect that this is an idiotic thing to do. Don't even think of marrying someone you have only officially been with for 3 days. Well time spent together. Are you crazy? You haven't had enough time together to run into any real dating issues. You have to have time to get to know the person, find out what you don't like about them, and love them despite these things. You never left the honeymoon phase of the relationship because you spent so little time together.

excellent food for thought

Okay confused, he doesn't live near you? and how did you give him a concussion? That whole story is just confusing