Ssssshhhh! Don't say anything. And for gods sake, if you are an ER doctor, please don't explain it to the scared and emotional women.

I don't care when the loss occured... either shortly after conception or after birth, it is horrifying and tragic!

Recently, I experienced a miscarriage. It is something I hope I never go through again!

So, I have decided to start this thread.... for those that have had some loss during pregnancy or shortly after.

Please feel free to share your stories.


This is my story....

I found out I was pregnant at 5 weeks LMP. This is my second pregnancy. I had no problems with my pregnancy of my son eight years ago. 6 weeks LMP, I woke up around 8 am and went to the bathroom. When I went to flush the toliet, I saw blood and clots. I immediately woke up my son and went to the nearest ER (not the one associated with my midwives; I hadn't even had my telephone interview with my midwives or first appointment, only set them up). At the ER, I was diagnosed with a threaten miscarriage. So, this means it was not conclusive if I actually had a miscarriage, but the ER doctor was talking to me as if I did. Even before any tests were run. However, I had a good nurse that still gave me hope.

Two days later, (which was the most emotional and longest two days ever!), I had blood drawn again. My beta hcg dropped from 1900 to 200-something. It confirmed that I lost the baby.

So, tomorrow afternoon, I have to go in to have another blood draw, because now they are tracking the beta down to zero. When I go in, I am going to tell them, if it has gone to zero, then I don't want to be called and if it hasn't and I need another blood draw, to just call to schedule it.

I am emotionally scarred from having this miscarriage. I am so worried that I will have another. I know this will all pass with time. And many many pregnancies end in miscarriage, but it doesn't change how I have felt through this experience.

I hope by sharing my story, more women will share their's.

I am sorry for your loss, my grandmother (she died when I was 9) had 2 miscarriages. My mom told me that meme went through alot of grief over them.

I don't know the details as my mom was very young.

my first child came into this world with a very difficult birth...she was sunny-side-up, and had to have heavy use of forceps and vacuum...tore me up pretty badly.

i lost four after her. two were around 8 weeks, the other two at about 14 and 18. i hemorrhaged with the last one and had to have an emergency D&C. for me, that was the worst...because of the bright lights and all the poking and prodding.

i went on to have three more children. i was told i wouldn't have any more...and my next that made it almost killed me. the last two pregnancies went a lot smoother, at least by comparison.

i hate when everyone says **** like, "god must have wanted an angel in heaven" or "everything happens for a reason" or "it was meant to happen". screw that. if you have something like that to say, don't even open your mouth...cause it's not helpful in the least.

say, "i'm so sorry, this sucks." or something of the like...

and like any death, time makes the frequency of being brought to your knees a little less, but it never goes away.

hugs, tanya...

My daughter miscarried in the middle of the night a couple of years ago and it was tramatic for me and I wasn't the one going through it.

So yea, it is a big deal.

I completely understand about the 'everything happens for a reason' responses! Miscarriage should never happen, but to say it happened for a reason is horrible!

I learned this past semester in my 'death, grief, and loss' class that its one of the worse things you can say to someone.

It is better to acknowledge the loss and leave it at that. Don't try to make the person feel better by saying 'god needed another angel' or whatever, cause the only person you are trying to make feel better is yourself.

I lost one of my twin girls after I was kicked in the stomach by my ex....one of the girls made it. I carried her until I was 6 months along and she decided she was making an appearance. She weighed 3 lbs...13 ounces...and was a healthy baby, as tiny as she was. My daughter is 24 now and getting ready to marry the man of her dreams....and is having a tat of her sister's name put on her shoulder...sweet that in a small way...her sister will be with her.
I am so sorry you are going through this Tanya...I know how much it hurts...I will send special prayers for you.

Obviously you are a very strong woman. Hang in there. I lost my first three and the last one was a D/C at 18 weeks and I had to wait 2 weeks before it could be removed. The pain of carrying around a dead fetus was traumatizing for me to the point that I don't want to get pregnant again. However...I did get pregnant three months after my last loss and now I have an 8 month old baby girl who is my world! But some times when I look at her and my heart fills with adoration, I wonder what love I am missing if my other children had survived. I miss them. Is that odd. I don't know if I want to risk another pregnancy, the pain is still too near. Thank you for posting, I have not spoken of it to any one close to me.

My first wife miscarried our son when she was four months in. It was hard, almost impossible, to take on us both. That was more than 15 years ago, and there still isn't a day that goes by that I don't at least think about it.

Thank you for sharing your story!

No, it is not odd to miss the babies that did not survive. I am sorry about your losses! And YOU are a very strong women!

You can still love the babies that aren't here. Think of something meaningful you can do to honor them and yourself for carrying them (even if it was for a brief time).


Thank you again for sharing your story!









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This is the reason I posted this thread. So many women do not have an outlet to talk about this. Or after time has past and everyone else has moved on, women (and men) need to be able to express their losses!

I just went threw this too I found out I was 6 weeks pregnant I was totally shocked and freaked out but then started to get excited. Everything seemed to be going great until I went in for an ultrasound at 11 weeks. I found out that the baby had died the week before it was devastating as I had already told my 3 year old son he was sooo excited to be a big brother but he has finally forgot and things are getting easier thanks for posting this so I could share my story.

My heart goes out to all of you guys. I have been fortunate not to have this situation happen to me, and I don't know what I would do or how I would react if it did :(