http://www.cnn.com/2010/LIVING/08/19/single.in.america/index.html?hpt=C2

Not surprised. Beside all the explanation they can come up, the simplest one is usually the most correct:

It's a psychological and a lifestyle problem.

I tend to agree and, being Italian, I'd like to see the Americans' take on this. I used to picture us Italians much more old-fashioned than Americans (y' know, family values and all that), but I think we're sadly catching up on the over-stressed lifestyle.

Or maybe I'm just growing up and being less delusional, and those family values never were real in the first place.

i agree with the latter

Of course there are family values. It's just not the fake stuff that I have seen over and over again. Fake relationship, fake life...everything is just faking it, instead of really having something meaningful.

Yep, there's been a time in my life when I realized the "fakeness" of many things I took for granted.

It dawned on me one day when I was traveling in Germany with my parents: my mother insisted that I go to church, even though neither of us spoke a single word of German, “because it's right to sacrifice an hour of your time to God”, she said.

Yeah, right. To me it felt like *wasting* an hour of my time without being able to learn anything useful (granted that what you can learn in a mass is of any use if you have a bit of compassion and common sense), and worst of all it felt like being subjugated. Since that day I had the clear perception of the "fakeness" of how most people in Italy -and elsewhere- live their christianity. Some time and some more thought later in fact I became an atheist (technically I'd be agnostic, but I do get pissed off when people try to get me into believing into whichever imaginary friend in the sky).

I don't reject christian values, actually I live by most of them. But they are *my* values, *I* chose them, because *I* think they're good. Not because I feel compelled by some sticky sick sense of guilt that I have to purge by “sacrificing one hour of my time” every week. And since I have no god, I am a happier person.


The same, I guess, goes for family values: I know what respect, listening and understanding are, and I think that a family should be based on that.

Alas, I also feel most people don't want to take the time to get to know and listen and understand each other, and are drawn to somehow fit a schedule instead.

Darthwiz, you are from Italy? Cool! I'm from Hungary. We have the same flag colors, you guys just flip it to its side.

Italian flag:




Hungarian flag:





check this out, seen this movie? I saw it like 3 times when I was like 12.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VUxxwhfNjzE

I can definitely understand why no one wants to be in a relationship if both people aren't both involved with work, housework, kids etc. What's the point if the woman (or man - being fair) comes home after a day at work and still has more things to do.

They might as well be single and doing it themselves, and don't have anyone to make a mess as well.

Of course, much of this has to do with lack of face-to-face communication.

The old "family values" are romanticized today. People didn't stay together due to better values and commitment. They stayed together because there was no other choice.

I agree that the current situation of frequent marriages and easy divorces is a bad thing for society as a whole and children in particular. But, to say that we need to go back to the way things were is a mistake.

It would be much better to look at a whole new approach to the problems we have now rather than going backwards. There's a reason why things changed from the past. It wasn't as wonderful as it may seem.

Interesting take. Besides, with my "being less delusional" came the thought that lack of communication, disrespect, cheating and the like were pretty much the same back in those legendary times when family values were stronger, but perhaps the real strength was the work of keeping those things covert and making less of a fuss about them. My family does (mostly) have those values, but perhaps we were just lucky.



One idea could be slowing down, in my opinion. I realize I don't need everything I have, so I don't strive for my career, try not to be greedy, keep an eye on my impact on the environment, and in general I have these golden rules:

1. try not to harm others
2. try to be well
3. if you can do good to others without losing too much, do it.

These rules pretty much cover most of my day-to-day life, and I'm often surprised by how little it takes to make someone happier. I'm not a big dispenser of smiles, but I always listen and that often helps.

This, in my opinion, is the number one problem we should address. Life is way too fast and stressful because we fill it with a bunch of crap we don't really need. There's a constant need to chase the "next big thing" and get more stuff.

People are very easily dissatisfied with what they have and where they are in life and the solution to that is not to have more and do more.

I'm not advocating not having goals, dreams or desires. But, if we all learned to be happy with what we have now while still pursuing our dreams I think life would be a lot smoother.

There's also the selfish factor where people feel entitled to what they want. But, that's a whole other issue. Maybe even more important to address than the one I just listed.

There's a problem with 43% of Americans being single ... ? Why ... ? There's still this li'l thing called 'free will' and 'choice' at work ... for now, that is ...

I'm not big on the institution of marriage anyway. I understand the need for a legal contract that gives each party certain rights should they divorce. But, you could make up such a contract without getting married.

they do... in texas it's called common law marriage. if you live together after so long it is the same thing as marriage. you have to prove that you were dependent on your partner, i think.

No one's forcing anything on anyone, but I personally read that as a sign of people living more and more in their shells.

Sometimes 'shells' are necessary ...

breaking down the numbers,, of single people,,1 in 4 have never been married, 1 in 10 are divorced, 7 in 100 are widowed

Id love to see a breakdown of those who have been married though, but I will try to read between the lines

57 percent are married, another 10 percent are divorced, and 6 percent are widowed

so, out of 73 percent who have ever married, 57 percent remain,,,which is probably a little better than success rates amongst SINGLES relationships,,,

Depends on the lawyers you talk to in Texas. A couple I've spoken with only acknowledge common-law when it come to kids. Otherwise, you figure out the bills when it comes to breakup.

O ya??? where the hell are they then??? I only want to meet ONE!!!

<<<<<<<<< ONE!

Awwww