dude, never dig through your friends trash. trust me. im going through that **** right now, and I want to ****ing slaughter my best friend. or my ex. actually just my ex. but im pissed at both of them. so there you go.

dude, never dig through your friends trash. trust me. im going through that **** right now, and I want to ****ing slaughter my best friend. or my ex. actually just my ex. but im pissed at both of them. so there you go.

Applying logic to an emotional equation? Surely you jest!

This happened to me 25 years ago. My best friend broke it off with his girlfriend and started to date someone who eventually became his wife (they are still married).

His ex-girlfriend was interested in me and I liked her too. This was a few months after he broke it off with her. I wanted to go out with her but felt funny about it.

I went to him and talked it over. I told him me and his ex were getting closer and I wanted to ask her out. He was fine with it and thanked me for coming to him to discuss it.

Me and his ex dated for almost 2 years...

she slipped me her number and i discovered it later that evening...
but i never called...

Logic can play a big factor in any emotional equation. You can tell by the voice, physical actions, or eyes. Logic dictates what is nervous, calm, or angry. Without logic in emotion you have just emotion, and that is a dangerous thing...of course, as I have found, logic without emotion is also dangerous.

Look at it this way; you offer a monkey a banana, the monkey's eyes grow wide...you can equate that the monkey wants the banana. You offer the same monkey a nugget of coal, the monkey wouldn't look at it...you can equate that the monkey does not want the coal. Logic works in emotions favor, just so few people actually realize it, the few that do I would put on a pedestal because they are higher.

Long distances relationships, a more practical example for the subject given...in a long distant relationship you have to hold trust for the partner, questions you ask should have answers if they pertain to the relationship. Someone answering with an uninteretsted attitude should be questioned, someone who answers with too much enthusiasm should be questioned all the same...a balance doesn't require question.

Taking into account the same situation purely controlled by emotion: He/she doesn't tell you what she did today, you freak...he/she tells you entirely too many details, you freak. Emotion is an awful thing in a lot of cases and destroys far more than it creates, logic on the other hand dictates creation for a better purpose.

See, now you made me get all philosophical.

your comfort level and hers will be your answer

personally. I really don't/didn't like it when my exes friends hit on me, but we had been married a very long time

but a recent BF who I wasn't that close too, I might date his friend but I would not make a braggy show of it - I'd keep it discreet and expect him to do the same

She is off limits forever to his friends! At least imho...

once had a friend come to me and ask if i was ok with him dating my ex. i thought it was quit nice of him....

she turned him down though. told him, as long as he and i were friends, she would never go out with him. (too bad she wasn't that thoughtful while we were together... )

I think as long as you discuss it with your friend and they are cool with it you should go for it. One man's trash is another man's treasure after all.

yes I think friends x's should be off limits however love may only come once a lifetime only you can decide if it's worth the risk

it depends, if we break up because they HURT me physically or emotionally, I would expect a GOOD friend to be loyal to me by respecting the pain was caused by them and not going on to put them BACK in my life via dating them


if we break up over simple incompatibility, no abuse, than I dont care who he goes on to be with and wish him the best(even with a friend)



For me, however, ANYONE who I know has dated a friend is off limits, just because there are too many OTHER fish in the sea to even RISK the idea that I may be causing my friend to re hash whatever happened everytime they see that person with me,,,

i personally don't mess around w1th my friends exes,no matter what,even if he treated her like crap,i still wouldn't.thats just me but i'm a "do what you like" kind of guy on most things just not this,so for the ones who would date their friends exes "do what you like"

My ex's friends didn't seem to think there was any kind of rule that applied because they all started calling me right after he had broken up with me. I was informed by my ex though that they were off limits to me, which I thought was ridiculous considering he had broken up with me so I was free to date whomever I wanted. I stayed away from them and didn't make any waves because we have a son together so it was just worth it to keep the peace between us.

The way I've always figured it is this. If your buddy has already moved on to someone else, it's cool. However, you still have to ask your buddy if it's okay, otherwise you'll end up choosing between him and her.


As a positive example, my brother married his best friends ex (married 24 years), and the two are still best friends.