Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

How can there be self-help GROUPS?

How come wrong numbers are never busy?

How do you know if honesty is the best policy unless you've tried some of the others?

How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?

If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?


I thought they were funny and off beat...

Lol! I love philosophy!

I know most probably don't like this post and won't post in it.....but I KNEW you would like them lol You ROCK!!!!

Why do tella marketers always no when you are home

Even when you are on the no call list

Because I told them.

thank you i needed that

I do what I can....it's only because I care. lol

Why do you park in a driveway... And drive in a parkway?

Why are we taught not to eat with our fingers and then they make finger food?

Ponder on...

It's "they".....dang them for teaching us

On a light switch... It says on, and off... When it's on, it says off. When it's off, you can't see it. Why bother even putting it on there?

Why is it called "whacking off" when you really aren't "whacking off" anything? I mean....really....

And.....


If you and Jack were on a horse, would you help Jack off the horse?


Ok.....I'm done.

If you dug a hole through the center of the earth and jumped in, would you stay at the center because of gravity?

If a person dies and then springs back to life, do they get their money back for the coffin?

Why do people think that swaying their arm back and forth would change the direction of a bowling ball?

If girls with large breasts work at Hooters, then do girls with one leg work at IHOP?

Why is it that everyone driving faster than you is considered an idiot and everyone driving slower than you is a moron?

If pro and con are opposites, wouldn't the opposite of progress be congress?

Why does grape flavor smell the way it is when actual grapes don't taste or smell anything like it.

If a lesbian has sex with other women but never with another man is she still considered a virgin?

If a kid refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?

Is it rude for a deaf person to talk (sign) with their mouth full of food?

What's the difference between normal ketchup and fancy ketchup?

If a transvesite goes missing, would youu put their face on a carton of Half and Half?

Why is the Lone Ranger called 'Lone' if he always has his Indian friend Tonto with him?

When does it stop being partly cloudy and start being partly sunny?

Are eyebrows considered facial hair?

If a baby's leg pops out at 11:59PM but his head doesn't come out until 12:01, which day was he born on?

In the song Yankee Doodle, is he calling the horse or the feather "macaroni"?

Is there a time limit on fortune cookie predictions?

Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?

Do they have the word "dictionary" in the dictionary?

Can you daydream at night?

Why is it that on a phone or calculator the number five has a little dot on it?

Can crop circles be square?

If ghosts can walk through walls and glide down stairs, why don't they fall through the floor?

Never argue with a women when she's tired, or rested.

Why do they put on shaving cream flammable I’m not planning on burning my whiskers off

Is it legal to travel down a road in reverse, as long as your following the direction of the traffic?

When Atheists go to court, do they have to swear on the bible?

Why is vanilla ice cream white when vanilla extract is brown?

Can animals commit suicide?

What do you do when you see an endangered animal that is eating an endangered plant?

If a doctor suddenly had a heart attack while doing surgery, would the other doctors work on the doctor or the patient?

How can something be "new" and "improved"? if it's new, what was it improving on?

Why aren't drapes double sided so it looks nice on the inside and outside of your home?

When two people marry, they say, "you may kiss the bride". What do they say if two MEN get married?

Why is it that when we "skate on thin ice", we can "get in hot water"?

Why do people say beans beans the magical fruit when beans are vegetables?

If laughter is the best medicine, who's the idiot who said they 'died laughing'?

If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?

Why are the little styrofoam pieces called peanuts?

Why does the Easter bunny carry eggs? Rabbits don't lay eggs.

Do siamese twins pay for one ticket or two tickets when they go to movies and concerts?

Why are they called 'Jolly Ranchers'? Who said that the ranchers were jolly?

Why does caregiver and caretaker mean the same thing?

Can a short person "talk down" to a taller person?

If a bald person works as a chef at a restaurant, do they have to wear a hairnet?

If milk goes bad if not refrigerated, does it go bad if the cow isnt refrigerated?

How fast do hotcakes sell?

Do prison buses have emergency exits?

Do astronauts change their clocks when they move over different time zones in space?

Can a black person join the kkk?

When lightning strikes the ocean why don't all the fish die?

When there's two men who "get married", do they both go to the same bachelor party?

If a guy that was about to die in the electric chair had a heart attack should they save him?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

Do Jewish vampires avoid crosses or Stars of David?

If London Bridge is standing why is there a song about it falling down?

Why is it that before 9/11 they always showed the emergency broadcast system test, and on 9/11 they never used it?

If a nursing mother had her nipples pierced would the milk come out of all three holes?

Who was Sadie Hawkins?

If a stripper gets breast implants can she write it off on her taxes as a business expense?

If parents say, "Never take candy from strangers" then why do we celebrate Halloween?

Do the minutes on the movie boxes include the previews, credits, and special features, or just the movie itself?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

What does PU stand for (as in "PU, that stinks!")?

Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments in a suitcase?

What is the stage of a reptile when it has eggs in it but they haven't been laid. Are they pregnant?

If Mars had earthquakes would they be called marsquakes?

Why do people never say "it's only a game" when they're winning?

If an ambulance is on its way to save someone, and it runs someone over, does it stop to help them?

Why is it called a funny bone, when if you hit it, it's not funny at all?

Do you yawn in your sleep?

Why do dogs like the smell of other dogs butts?

If a cannible was on death row could he ask for the last guy that was electricuted for his last meal?

Do Chinese people get English sayings tattooed on their bodies?

Do glow-in-the-dark objects stop glowing when somebody turns the lights on?

If you died with braces on would they take them off?

If someone has their nose pierced, have a cold, and take thier nose ring out. Does snot come out of the piercing hole?

How come lemon washing up liquid contains real lemons, but lemon juice contains artificial flavorings.

Do you wake up or open your eyes first?

Did Noah have woodpeckers on the ark? If he did, where did he keep them?

Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor but book publishers aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11?

How do you handcuff a one-armed man?

If the FBI breaks your door down do they have to pay for it?