The sad thing is that some, never learn to move forward...

I had a 15 yr marriage I TRIED like hell to heal. I left him. We went back and forth but eventually "I" just got tired of trying. SSDD. Maybe, for you, you just need to go thru the motions until one of you say ENOUGH and enforces it...or worse yet, she introduces you to her new man..which will happen.

Oh and by the way, I will always love my ex. BUT I'm not in love with him. That is confusing to get through. They can be a great people but ultimately make your life together miserable.

Question you need to ask yourself is how much more time to do you want to waste of your life as a person. The older you get the harder it can be to find love. ~good luck~ ~hugs to you~

Juliet, beautifully stated.. If one doesn't get it from that, they never will..

Thanks, I appreciate it. You have great advice and tell it straight. I just wish I knew why someone that used to tell me how much they loved me would turn to someone like that.
I will learn to move on, I know I will. I know what Im worth and I know what I deserve and what I can give. Somehow I will.

Thank you

If you ask anyone that knows me well on here.. I give it "straight" pretty or not... Some can't handle it... Quite a few email me so don't feel it'd bother me, I like to help when and if I can....

You seem to know alot about people.

n
I've experienced my own pain... I learned from it.. That doesn't mean I don't make mistakes/bad decisions here and there, just that I've learned to handle it and take responsibility for it without giving "someone else" the power on how they affect me...

I was with my ex wife for 6 years. To be honest her, she made it easy for me. What I mean is, when I told her that it was over. We sat down and had a talk. The thing about that, I was being honest with meyself and where the relationship was going. Actually, it was going nowhere. So when I left her, she would try many different ways to get me back. The more she tried the easeir it was to let her go . As far as time goes. It's different for everyone. I say it depends on how much you want the feeling to take control of you or you take control of your feelings.

I just wish I knew how people can just fall out of love with each other. Or how someone suddenly loves and wants you again once they see you moving on. And then once your back with them, they don't want you anymore.

i've read through most of the thread, and i tend to agree with what has been said so far.

you really need to stop the cycle, and stop being her you know what. having a child with some one doesn't automatically mean they own you.

you can still be a good father to your child, but you do have to make a decision how you will be treated for the rest of your life.

you are the only one that allows this behaviour to continue. love has nothing to do with it, and as cheezy as it sounds, love is supposed to make you feel strong, important, needed, cared for etc etc

so maybe you don't love her, but you are just stuck...don't allow some one to dictate how you feel, own it!

Then answer isn't that hard really... One is sometimes a person gets tired of being the only one trying to work on things..

The other is, when someone asks someone back it's b/c they're scared and want it to work but in their heart of hearts they know their "heart" isn't into it, it's a matter of convenience and after a bit of trying they still can't get that "feeling" they need to keep going so it appears their mind has changed...

A profound statement and words to live by!

"if a person acts like the don't give a crap, they REALLY DON'T give a crap!!!"

What one chooses to do with the truth is their busines... In other words, if YOU don't want to believe the truth for what you're seeing and experiencing, then you're going to let the other person lie to you for as long as it works for them...

Your right, and she did make me feel strong, loved and cared for at one time. But that was a long time ago.
Thanks for replying to this. Im starting to feel alot better from what everyone has said so far. I appreciate all the compassion. This whole ordeal has been so hard to deal with. I almost forgotten who I was or who I started out to be when I first met her.

It happens at times but the strength comes for not letting "it" own us... Edy put it wonderfully...

I know, I'll find that strengh again somehow. I just want to be careful not to turn into someone that's cold and hard because of it.
It's so hard, you know. She wanted me so bad, so completely. Then once she had me, it all went down hill from there. It all seemed so perfect and honest in the beginning. I was devoted to her all heart and soul, the way I thought it was supposed to be. I don't know how I will ever be able to trust someone else with that again.

I've been there for the most part.. I don't have the answer about trusting again, that part I'm still working on.. But you first have to be ok with you before any of that matters again...

I'm ok with me, still working on the trusting another part but I go by the "give them enough rope" rule... I watch and listen, if they blow it they blow it, I don't invest before that... That's not to say I'm hard or mean, just very careful and somewhat removed/void of DEEP emotion..

Doesn't that suck that people just take the best parts of what we used to trust relationships to be away?
I'll definitely be looking for the red flags the next time. I just hate having to be that way, and to think the next person I'll be dating will probably be doing the same thing with me because of what they might have went through.

i just watch midget porn