Previous 1
Topic: I need some advice about something serious
SmurfyPoet292721's photo
Mon 02/01/10 01:11 PM
Last night my ex boyfriend sent me a text telling me he was going to kill himself in i think it was like 5 minutes if i kept ignoring him i didnt call because i knew it was all a ploy for attention it was annoying but hey what are you gonna do? But this afternoon went a little bit too far. I got another text from him he was trying to pose as someone else claiming he had been in an accident i knew it was him from the terrible spelling obviously if i dont do anything it'll get wose i've never dealt with this so does anyone know the right course of action... i care about him but i can't have this anymore

DrRob's photo
Mon 02/01/10 01:13 PM
kick him to the Curb...
call blocking,email blocker,etc etc.

it will never end if you dont.

SmurfyPoet292721's photo
Mon 02/01/10 01:15 PM
oh i have but he needs help he wont tell anyone

Ruth34611's photo
Mon 02/01/10 01:17 PM
I think you are probably best cutting off all communication with him like you have. But, you should keep a diary of events in case his threats of hurting himself turn into threats of hurting you and you need to go to the police. Text messages are best saved by taking a picture of them. Good luck to you.

no photo
Mon 02/01/10 01:23 PM
If he ever threatens to kill himself again, call the police and let them handle it. I had a guy say that stuff to me a long time ago and I ended up talking to a suicide hotline about it. The man had done it for YEARS with other women. They said if he meant it he sure was taking his time and that ultimately, you have no control over it if someone is serious about doing themselves in. Obviously this man had used it as a device to manipulate you and he's pretty pathetic. He may need real help, but you are not a professional and you need to back away. You can't solve his problems and he actually probably doesn't WANT YOU TO. He wants to manipulate you. He DEPENDS on your caring for him. It's part of the way he gets under your skin.

no photo
Mon 02/01/10 01:26 PM
I agree, to the previous poster. Dont reply to the texts, just call the authorities. He will get the proper help he needs then.

If it continues, change your number. I have recently had to do this, and it wasn't too bad. I have a much quieter life now.

TxsGal3333's photo
Mon 02/01/10 01:55 PM

If he ever threatens to kill himself again, call the police and let them handle it. I had a guy say that stuff to me a long time ago and I ended up talking to a suicide hotline about it. The man had done it for YEARS with other women. They said if he meant it he sure was taking his time and that ultimately, you have no control over it if someone is serious about doing themselves in. Obviously this man had used it as a device to manipulate you and he's pretty pathetic. He may need real help, but you are not a professional and you need to back away. You can't solve his problems and he actually probably doesn't WANT YOU TO. He wants to manipulate you. He DEPENDS on your caring for him. It's part of the way he gets under your skin.


I have to agree with this for I have been there done that and called. Most of the time it is a cry for attention but then at times they will actually do it. I say let the ones that know how to deal with him do so and back away from the situation.whoa

beauty314's photo
Mon 02/01/10 02:06 PM
OMG....
run as fast as you can and don't look backscared

centered's photo
Mon 02/01/10 02:09 PM
Edited by centered on Mon 02/01/10 02:10 PM

I agree, to the previous poster. Dont reply to the texts, just call the authorities. He will get the proper help he needs then.

If it continues, change your number. I have recently had to do this, and it wasn't too bad. I have a much quieter life now.


I also agree with SKPCG ...

However, you don't have to change your number - most
all cellphone companies will block numbers for you ...
call you provider and have them set it up for you.

CatsLoveMe's photo
Mon 02/01/10 02:11 PM
As much as I hate the police, they can serve useful from time to time. Call the police, and tell them of your situation. Call the non-emergency # though, NOT 911!

tanyaann's photo
Mon 02/01/10 02:22 PM
Like many other people stated... if he has threatened to kill himself, regardless of if you think he will act on it, call the police and report it. Also, report when he contacts you, by documenting it in writing... time of call or text, what was said. Save all text messages and voicemails. Do not repond to him. You might also want to contact your local county court house or domestic violence unit of police department to get information about getting a personal protection order/restraining order.

no photo
Mon 02/01/10 02:23 PM

If he ever threatens to kill himself again, call the police and let them handle it. I had a guy say that stuff to me a long time ago and I ended up talking to a suicide hotline about it. The man had done it for YEARS with other women. They said if he meant it he sure was taking his time and that ultimately, you have no control over it if someone is serious about doing themselves in. Obviously this man had used it as a device to manipulate you and he's pretty pathetic. He may need real help, but you are not a professional and you need to back away. You can't solve his problems and he actually probably doesn't WANT YOU TO. He wants to manipulate you. He DEPENDS on your caring for him. It's part of the way he gets under your skin.


Wise woman! :thumbsup:

lonetar25's photo
Mon 02/01/10 02:27 PM

As much as I hate the police, they can serve useful from time to time. Call the police, and tell them of your situation. Call the non-emergency # though, NOT 911!


agreed

if you just cut contact and he does something daft, you will have guilt forever.

go and speak to the cops, take your phone and show them the messages. it will ease your worries just knowing youve done something.

the truth is, he wants attention, if he was going to kill himself he`d just do it. its unlikely he will do anything.


if he txts you something like that again and you feel you have to reply, just txt back "i wont talk to you untill you stop threatening me" if he replys, send it again. then leave it alone.

willing2's photo
Mon 02/01/10 02:28 PM

oh i have but he needs help he wont tell anyone

I may be wrong but, your statement tells me you are looking for someone to tell you it's ok for you to be there for him.

If you're not a professional counselor, you can't help him. Even if you were, ou are to close to the disease to be able to be neutral.

Leave him to the pros and back away from th' fruitcake! :thumbsup:

silly's photo
Mon 02/01/10 02:29 PM

oh i have but he needs help he wont tell anyone


he won't tell anyone just u because he knows that he can get away with it from u don't let him.If it does continue do call the police.

bedlum1's photo
Mon 02/01/10 02:32 PM

oh i have but he needs help he wont tell anyone
ITS JUST A MANIPULATING GAME--RUN,RUN LIKE THE WIND...LET HIM FIND HELP IF HE NEEDS IT SO BAD..NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY

Queene123's photo
Mon 02/01/10 02:35 PM
there was this guy yrs ago.my neighbor met him at a bar
and she gave him my number for him thinking it was her phone
(she used it as a message phone)
he called i dont know how many times that nite to wee early in the morn
and he talked about sucided where i ended up calling the police
i didnt have phone number but i had his name so thats all they really needed
they went out to his home but he denied the whole thing. but to actualy find out from the police he had done this threat thing many other times.. its more like wanting attention..

you get it the wrong way by threatening to kill yourself

no photo
Mon 02/01/10 02:44 PM
Just ask him if there is anything you can do to assist him.

FearandLoathing's photo
Mon 02/01/10 02:49 PM

Last night my ex boyfriend sent me a text telling me he was going to kill himself in i think it was like 5 minutes if i kept ignoring him i didnt call because i knew it was all a ploy for attention it was annoying but hey what are you gonna do? But this afternoon went a little bit too far. I got another text from him he was trying to pose as someone else claiming he had been in an accident i knew it was him from the terrible spelling obviously if i dont do anything it'll get wose i've never dealt with this so does anyone know the right course of action... i care about him but i can't have this anymore


Call the police, give them his phone number, they will take care of it. Mental institutions are quite nice this time of year.

Kevin77's photo
Mon 02/01/10 02:57 PM
Get his parents to commit him.

Previous 1