This is my first post and I really need to just do this because if I keep it all inside my head it will drive my crazy. I met a nice guy online a little over 2 months ago. We would email each other, then it lead to the phone calls and then to meetings. I felt a click and thought that this could be something good. One night I asked him what he thought about us, because I didn't want to assume things that were not there, and he said he thought we were in the beginning of a relationship. Good, we are both looking at this the same way. Then the drama started, he would say that he would call and then nothing, if I called him, his phone was turned off. When I said something about that he claimed that he never turns his phone off. OK, I could have been wrong, but even little kids know that when a cell phone goes right to VM it is off. Now we both are older, around 50, and life is a bit busy for both of us, so getting time to be together is not easy. We would make plans to see each other, and in the beginning he would, but in the past few weeks it changed. He would say that he would see me and then he would not answer his phone, when I would try get a hold of him, it was always some excuse, true or not I can not say. One time he couldn't take the time to answer his phone or call and leave a message, but took the time to email me a message, what's with that? I did ask if he had changed his mind about us and his answer was NO he liked me and wanted to get to know me more. Now it is Christmas time and he planned to see me Christmas Eve, we would talk on the phone Wednesday night and he said I will see you tomorrow night. I made sure that things would be special, wrapped a few presents for him, placed sopme nice candles around the room, things like that. I had a annual party with my friends that I went to but left early so wI could see him. Called as I was on my way home, right to VM. I get home and there is a message from him that "something" came up and he would be there all night and maybe he would call me on CHristmas. This something was not a family or medical thing, so I am having a hard time understanding this. Am I seeing this all wrong and he is not avoiding me but just has some serious relationship issues? I can not answer for him, But my feeling are that wven thought he never actually told my any lies, his silence is worse.I hope you can see why I needed to just rant on about all of this. Thanks

If it were me I would think that he wasn't that interested in me......don't call him and see what happens next, that will answer any of the lingering questions you may have

he may be an alcoholic or addict....that sounds like the behavior

Do you have any idea how many guys would love to be in his shoes? Im sorry that I can't give you any advice but stay strong and good luck. BTW if you want theres a lot of us that hang out in the over 50's forum's if you want to vent.

SOME PEOPLE THINK THEIR FEELINGS(THIS GUY)ARE ALL THAT MATTER! LET`S BE HONEST, THIS GUY IS FULL OF IT! GOOD LUCK HON...

Sucks to be going thru this, but must admit after only 2 months you sure do sound needy. You need an explanation, you need a reason, I'd tell you to ease up. He may just be busy or you may really be correct about him, but don't go crazy trying to assume nor make rationalization on his behavior. Stop contacting him, give him the chance to pursue, offer him the room to explain, or make it up to you, either way do not sit and wait for him, keep yourself busy.

I am hoping you're reading him wrong, but as people we can only control our actions not the actions of another. So just relax, enjoy yourself, and have a great holiday!!!

i think that the 'something' that came up was his wife.

have you ever been to his house? met his friends? met any of his family?

Something else is going on with this man, and you have become an option instead of a priority.

I was thinking "married" as well.

Marry him

I also say the guy ....has a Wife

Ditto ^ But I have to echo the others and say The wifey is the priority.

You can bet this guy has a wife!!!!!
You can see that a mile away ,as to
why you always got VM.

I'm so sorry that u are going through this.The guy is not worth u getting all worked over about.
He is probably either married,or just not that really interested.sorry to put it so blut.Don't call him or e-mail and see what happens.If he wants to see u he will found a way to do it.

Not sure what he's doing but for sure has cold feet, after you mentioned a relationship.I'd guess he just likes frosting, and not wanting the cake.Time to take the trash out.

Seems you think you are in a relationship and he doesn't. I'm guessing he sees it as a casual thing, and you see it more serious than it is.

I'd say more on.

LOL, what's the difference? I just left a relationship because she was addicted to alcohol (A narcotic drug).

Oh and to the OP, depends on the phone type and service, he may have been on the phone and it went to VM (not heard the beep) or battery may have been too low.

Good luck!

A........ He's married.

B.........He's a player.

C.........He's got all he wanted from you...

D.........He's really the woman that done this same thing to me a year ago????????????????????



I would be DONE with him,,,as TO many PROBLEMS,,with HIM MISSING IN ACTIONS..... Somethings NOT right,,who cares what it is,,
he will only end up,,hurting you.... sorry

He's just not that into you. Next!

..you know deep inside this is a no brainer right..if the guy wanted to be there he would have been there..i'm a guy and if i had even a slim chance at christmas nookie..i'm there...i meant christmas cookies yea.. that's it cookies...