Topic: thinking of leaving
lalalove's photo
Tue 11/03/09 04:33 PM
so i'm deciding on if i should leave my so called bf but its really hard. they should make a rule book for everythinglaugh

TxsSun's photo
Tue 11/03/09 04:34 PM
Yes they should, but without not knowing why, none of us can give advice. I wish you luck!

lalalove's photo
Tue 11/03/09 04:38 PM
i just feel i don't deserve how he is treating me but i fell really hard for this guy so its hard to leave. i hardly get close to people to actually date seriously, so its a little more tough than most i guess. i think my question is how have people here left someone in there heart don't want to but deep down may be the best thing?

BettyB's photo
Tue 11/03/09 04:39 PM
I think just the fact that you are thinking of leaving and call him your so called bF kind of says a lot.Unless of course you are just having a bad day with him,in which case then go out for awhile ans think it over.
If you have been feeling this wy for a long time ,then you aren't really happy and it isn't working for you.JMO.
Good Luckflowerforyou

Goofball73's photo
Tue 11/03/09 04:45 PM
It is a tough thing to do. To leave someone because you know it is best for not only yourself, but for them as well. Me and my ex argued alot, over the silliest things. We didn't get along, and when we said we would work on, we did try. But we just never could work it out. I know she is better off without me, and yes, it hurts. You never want to admit that you failed at something. But, life is a journey, and I chalk it up as this was part of my walk in life. Had I never gone for it, dating her, then I probably would have wondered what might have been. But, at least I know. And that gives me some solace.

I think you know that it is over, and you want to see if there is an easy way to do it. And, sadly, there isn't. Breaking up is very hard to do. I wish you the best.flowerforyou

AGoodGuy1026's photo
Tue 11/03/09 04:52 PM
bleh, the ease is in knowing... the difficulty is in acting...

I guess the first thing, IMHO:... your feelings are valid... if you feel mad, you are mad. If you feel happy, you are happy... if you feel you are being treated badly, then you are being treated badly...

The only advise I would give -- is to communicate to your partner EXACTLY how you feel... not what THEY do, but what YOU are feeling... and give them the chance to understand the whole picture...

Of course, you must also weigh what you have invested in the relationship. If you have been in a relationship for some time, and have invested a lot into it emotionally - physically... perhaps even monitarily... give them the decency to see how you really feel.

The things I say are not easy. It's not easy to tell someone how they hurt you, but if you are about them at all... you will give them the communication of how their actions make you feel... then you know, from THEM (not us) if they are willing to understand and compromise...

I wish you the best of luck... I gues in a nutshell, honesty and communication are key!...

Luck to you...

drinker

lalalove's photo
Tue 11/03/09 04:52 PM
thank you so much everyone happy i guess i just need to suck it up and goofball your right it feels like you failed but im still young( even though its not the point lol)

silly's photo
Tue 11/03/09 04:55 PM

i just feel i don't deserve how he is treating me but i fell really hard for this guy so its hard to leave. i hardly get close to people to actually date seriously, so its a little more tough than most i guess. i think my question is how have people here left someone in there heart don't want to but deep down may be the best thing?


If u feel that u don't deserve how he treats u then u probably don't.Yes breaking up is hard,but sometimes it's just for the best.I know the heart wants what the heart wants,but sometimes we just need to listen to our heads and let go.U will get through it.If its was meant to be then it just would be.

no photo
Tue 11/03/09 05:05 PM
Edited by peladac on Tue 11/03/09 05:07 PM
I was stuck in a marriage for 9 years with someone that treated me badly. Once kids get involved it's a whole new ball game.

Yours is showing his true colors now, mine didn't until the papers were signed. So it is completely up to you on if you think you can handle living with someone that doesn't treat you right. It doesn't get better. As my father used to tell me, tigers don't change their stripes.

Please think it over long and hard. One thing, if you stay with someone for a long time who treats you badly, trust me, those loving feeling will dissipate slowly and surely, then by the time you do leave, love will no longer exist. If someone truly loves you that will not treat you badly. I don't know how bad but any mistreatment is very disrespectful and not a good sign.

I really wish you the best of luck, I really do.

oldsage's photo
Tue 11/03/09 05:06 PM
If what you are getting, isn't worth what you are taking??

Time to make some changes.

Opinion Old Sage.

lalalove's photo
Tue 11/03/09 05:27 PM
thanks again everyonedrinker