ONE
Recently, when I went to McDonald's or I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 12 Chicken McNuggets.
I asked for a half dozen nuggets.
'We do not have half dozen nuggets,' said the teenager at the counter.
'You do? "
I replied.
'We only have six, nine, or twelve,'
was the reply.
'So I can not order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six? "
'That's right. "
So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets
(Unbelievable but sadly true ...)

TWO
I was checking out at the local Walmart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those 'dividers' that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they would not get mixed.
After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the 'divider', looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it.
Not finding the bar code, she said to me, 'Do you know how much this is? "
I said to her
'I've changed my mind, I do not think I'll buy that today. "
She said
'OK,'
and I paid her for the things and left.
She had no clue to what had just happened.

THREE
A woman at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly.
When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy."
(keep shuddering!)

FOUR
I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car ..
'Do you need some help? "
I asked.
She replied,
'I knew I! should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can not get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this? "
'Hmmm, I do not know. Do you have an alarm, too? "
I asked.
'No, just this remote thingy,'
she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied,
'Why do not you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk ....'
PLEASE just lay down before you hurt yourself!

FIVE
Swift Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said,
'I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do? "
'Just use paper from the photocopier, "
the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five 'blank' copies.
Brunette, by the way!

SIX
A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid had eaten ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and he should be fine, the mother says, 'I just gave him some ant killer ......'
Dispatcher: 'Rush him in to emergency! "


Life is tough. It's even tougher if you're stupid!!

What a way to begin my day!

My ex-daughter in-law was one of these people....she actually thought that hot water would not put out a fire

I have an older daughter who happens to be blonde, and she does have her blonde moments: on those long weekends that we get,(she lives about 4 hours away-In Wisconson) she came to visit her younger sister, her younger sister's husband is in the Army reserve and was doing his time over in Iraq for a year, and we're all talking about it, the oldest daughter asked where did you say he was, my youngest daughter said Iraq, my oldest daughter's response to that was well great you can visit him on weekends?????????