"Udder" douche?

What is he, a cow?

SORRY,,,I just had to pop in and SEE if THIS was about me,,,,,lol

The one she's sleeping with has all the power.

wait until he is not home and ask her if you might try. tell her what could it hurt.....

OK, so I phoned her up and we talked for what seemed like a very long time. She was actually very understanding and said that she was actually seeing it as well, then she promised me that she would talk to him tonight about it. Then we are meeting for lunch tomorrow to continue the conversation.

Now thats those Ohio girls for ya.

Is this really about a computer being repaired or are you slightly pissed off that her boyfriend is getting more of her attention than you

Hmmm if MAYBE you took the time to read ALL the post you would see that I did say that I was just using that as ONE example.

I did read all the posts,it was you saying I guess I just do not want to lose her again and if i ever get two minutes with her that made me think.

Made you think what? That I care more about her computer then a over controlling guy? If so, then you really need to get to know me. Because buddy you are FAR from being correct. Really has NOTHING to do with her computer. Like I said, just an example. I guess you also did not read the fact that he is ALWAYS AROUND so there for yes I would have to sneak a couple of minutes to talk to her about how I feel. Give me a f*cking break.

Sorry I thought forums were for airing opinions,maybe not.Couldn't help but notice that ALWAYS AROUND is in capital letters

Whisper, this is a power and control situation...

You are already picking up on it...and reacting to it.

Perhaps at lunch, ask your girlfriend what it is she likes about this guy...


let her waffle on without vomitting..


then ask her what are the things she finds less than appealing about him...

say nothing... (hard to do, but necessary)

then ask her if you may point out what you observe...

if she says yes....just be truthful without emotion.


Tell her, that she is important to you, and that it makes you uncomfortable seeing her in a situation that is reducing her, not expanding her...but that no matter what, you love her, for her.


That's all you can do.

Yea figured I needed to make things bigger for you so you can read it.

Thank you Jess. I will do that. It will help her see the things as well. I really like that.

Sounds like your friend is trying to be diplomatic with both of you.

It is clear she has made her choice as to who is the first relationship in her life. It isn't you.

I am sorry this is a worry to you and you might well be right he doesn't know how to fix the computer and might be a jerk. I am sure the intense dislike he feels compeating with you for her attention probably doesn't bring out the best in him.

But she is a single Mom, with a seriously handicapped child, and maybe she thinks this is the best guy she can get. Since you have already shot down her previous choice I wouldn't recommend trying to run off this one or she is going to question wheather you want her to be happy.

Good! I figured she was likely already seeing the red flags.

I have never heard someone say, "I used to have this boyfriend who was a controlling, self-centered, possessive bastard but then my girlfriend took me to lunch and pointed this out to me and so I broke up with him and boy am I glad for my friend."
This is going to backfire on you. Your intentions are good but your friend's self-worth is on shakey ground and this is the dance they do. There's a lid for every pot.
Take up raquetball or something and I mean that in a positive way. I'm afraid you're going to end up with your feelings hurt.