Community > Dating & Relationships

Topic: Honesty!
IndnPrncs Joined Sun 11/04/07 Posts: 58420	Wed 07/15/09 09:41 PM
I think it's the way you approach it.. If you're not in perfect shape you shouldn't be saying anything in the first place.. I'd rather someone sit down and tell me they think I'm putting on a few pounds and perhaps say "let's go to the gym, walk, etc. together"... It's going to sting no matter how you say it b/c the thought will be "won't you love me with a few extra, I mean it's not 50 or 100 lbs"... And if you're not a Zeus/Samson type I'd just keep my mouth shut b/c you're opening the door for the truth about your average self as well, not to mention the other things you do that are as annoying as heck that she's been keeping to herself.. Note: the you's and her's are just for wording not anyone here...

luckyguy2008 Joined Sat 12/27/08 Posts: 492	Wed 07/15/09 09:42 PM
Honestly? This is another "why do women always" or "why do men always" thread and the reality is that neither gender "ALWAYS" does anything... Just my humble opinion! Women don't always get pissed with every statement, but every relationship I have been in has had me being honest about something causing a MAJOR problem in it.

littleike Joined Fri 11/09/07 Posts: 4325	Wed 07/15/09 09:42 PM
Why do women say they want men to be honest and then get pissed when they are? This is completely from experience! i hear you loud and clear. dont try to figure women out, there strange creatures and confuseing. its hopeless to try and understand them

Dragoness Joined Wed 10/17/07 Posts: 23320	Wed 07/15/09 09:42 PM
Why do women say they want men to be honest and then get pissed when they are? This is completely from experience! What some men want to call honesty is really bashing others, in that case they get the double barrels. But if they are being honest and not intentionally hurtful that is different. I have heard brutal honesty which hurts like hell but you know they are not intending to hurt you intentionally so you take the sting and move on.

HockeyChick Joined Thu 10/23/08 Posts: 4194	Wed 07/15/09 09:42 PM
I prefer honesty...Im a big girl I can handle the truth whether I like it or not! When do you think the honesty is too much for people? When it's put in a way that makes them feel bad,,honesty can be deliverd in a tactful,nice way,so as people are more receptive of it...J.M.O. exactly!

littleike Joined Fri 11/09/07 Posts: 4325	Wed 07/15/09 09:43 PM
It's because they DON'T want honesty, unless it's in THEIR favor. i use that line all the time. they dont want honesty unless its something they want to hear or benifits them

HockeyChick Joined Thu 10/23/08 Posts: 4194	Wed 07/15/09 09:44 PM
Honestly? This is another "why do women always" or "why do men always" thread and the reality is that neither gender "ALWAYS" does anything... Just my humble opinion! Women don't always get pissed with every statement, but every relationship I have been in has had me being honest about something causing a MAJOR problem in it. hhrrmmm....makes me wonder how u are being honest then.... are going at it with no tact? i can take honesty with tact, but some dude just shooting his mouth off?? hell, i can do that and piss ya off and good...derrr..lol

galendgirl Joined Sun 07/06/08 Posts: 24728	Wed 07/15/09 09:45 PM
Honestly? This is another "why do women always" or "why do men always" thread and the reality is that neither gender "ALWAYS" does anything... Just my humble opinion! Women don't always get pissed with every statement, but every relationship I have been in has had me being honest about something causing a MAJOR problem in it. A truthful thing may still be something that would piss someone off...but that is still better than a lie, IMO. Again, this is just my opinion but that would make BOTH of our observations meld, huh?

littleike Joined Fri 11/09/07 Posts: 4325	Wed 07/15/09 09:47 PM
ok negative one and negative two.. holy heck, did you ever stop to think honesty can be delivered in a way that doesn't slam someone? Or you could be right about some women not really wanting the truth but not all and some men are exactly the same... but let's just label all women b/c it's easier that way and will ensure that you are seen as negative and undesirable to date... well when 99% of women do it and thats all you see then all women are put in that catogory. its the same as women labeling all guys are dogs and they do it all the time

Monier Joined Sat 03/17/07 Posts: 3337	Wed 07/15/09 09:48 PM
Mix honesty with empathy and you can never go wrong.

luckyguy2008 Joined Sat 12/27/08 Posts: 492	Wed 07/15/09 09:49 PM
Honestly? This is another "why do women always" or "why do men always" thread and the reality is that neither gender "ALWAYS" does anything... Just my humble opinion! Women don't always get pissed with every statement, but every relationship I have been in has had me being honest about something causing a MAJOR problem in it. hhrrmmm....makes me wonder how u are being honest then.... are going at it with no tact? i can take honesty with tact, but some dude just shooting his mouth off?? hell, i can do that and piss ya off and good...derrr..lol I am typically tactful, at least until the fight starts. I understand the other person has feelings and I try very hard to respect that. I don't like people firing off at the mouth to me so I don't treat others like that. I am just not sure where and when it all goes wrong. It is not usually the "Does this make me look fat" question. Most of the time it is something small and in my opinion relatively unimportant, and not life changing.

luckyguy2008 Joined Sat 12/27/08 Posts: 492	Wed 07/15/09 09:50 PM
Honestly? This is another "why do women always" or "why do men always" thread and the reality is that neither gender "ALWAYS" does anything... Just my humble opinion! Women don't always get pissed with every statement, but every relationship I have been in has had me being honest about something causing a MAJOR problem in it. A truthful thing may still be something that would piss someone off...but that is still better than a lie, IMO. Again, this is just my opinion but that would make BOTH of our observations meld, huh? It does!

IndnPrncs Joined Sun 11/04/07 Posts: 58420	Wed 07/15/09 09:51 PM
ok negative one and negative two.. holy heck, did you ever stop to think honesty can be delivered in a way that doesn't slam someone? Or you could be right about some women not really wanting the truth but not all and some men are exactly the same... but let's just label all women b/c it's easier that way and will ensure that you are seen as negative and undesirable to date... well when 99% of women do it and thats all you see then all women are put in that catogory. its the same as women labeling all guys are dogs and they do it all the time Neil 99% is a completely inaccurate and exaggerated statement...

littleike Joined Fri 11/09/07 Posts: 4325	Wed 07/15/09 09:59 PM
ok negative one and negative two.. holy heck, did you ever stop to think honesty can be delivered in a way that doesn't slam someone? Or you could be right about some women not really wanting the truth but not all and some men are exactly the same... but let's just label all women b/c it's easier that way and will ensure that you are seen as negative and undesirable to date... well when 99% of women do it and thats all you see then all women are put in that catogory. its the same as women labeling all guys are dogs and they do it all the time Neil 99% is a completely inaccurate and exaggerated statement... not inacurrate in california

IndnPrncs Joined Sun 11/04/07 Posts: 58420	Wed 07/15/09 10:02 PM
ok negative one and negative two.. holy heck, did you ever stop to think honesty can be delivered in a way that doesn't slam someone? Or you could be right about some women not really wanting the truth but not all and some men are exactly the same... but let's just label all women b/c it's easier that way and will ensure that you are seen as negative and undesirable to date... well when 99% of women do it and thats all you see then all women are put in that catogory. its the same as women labeling all guys are dogs and they do it all the time Neil 99% is a completely inaccurate and exaggerated statement... not inacurrate in california it's inaccurate ANYWHERE you don't have statistical data to back it up and it would be impossible to collect b/c it's unrealistic and inaccurate...

littleike Joined Fri 11/09/07 Posts: 4325	Wed 07/15/09 10:05 PM
ok negative one and negative two.. holy heck, did you ever stop to think honesty can be delivered in a way that doesn't slam someone? Or you could be right about some women not really wanting the truth but not all and some men are exactly the same... but let's just label all women b/c it's easier that way and will ensure that you are seen as negative and undesirable to date... well when 99% of women do it and thats all you see then all women are put in that catogory. its the same as women labeling all guys are dogs and they do it all the time Neil 99% is a completely inaccurate and exaggerated statement... not inacurrate in california ok your right i dont have nothing to back it up and i might be off a bit. but its most that i meet it's inaccurate ANYWHERE you don't have statistical data to back it up and it would be impossible to collect b/c it's unrealistic and inaccurate...

littleike Joined Fri 11/09/07 Posts: 4325	Wed 07/15/09 10:06 PM
ok negative one and negative two.. holy heck, did you ever stop to think honesty can be delivered in a way that doesn't slam someone? Or you could be right about some women not really wanting the truth but not all and some men are exactly the same... but let's just label all women b/c it's easier that way and will ensure that you are seen as negative and undesirable to date... well when 99% of women do it and thats all you see then all women are put in that catogory. its the same as women labeling all guys are dogs and they do it all the time Neil 99% is a completely inaccurate and exaggerated statement... not inacurrate in california ok your right i dont have nothing to back it up and i might be off a bit. but its most that i meet it's inaccurate ANYWHERE you don't have statistical data to back it up and it would be impossible to collect b/c it's unrealistic and inaccurate... ok your right i dont have nothing to back it up and i might be off a bit. but its most that i meet

luckyguy2008 Joined Sat 12/27/08 Posts: 492	Wed 07/15/09 10:07 PM
ok negative one and negative two.. holy heck, did you ever stop to think honesty can be delivered in a way that doesn't slam someone? Or you could be right about some women not really wanting the truth but not all and some men are exactly the same... but let's just label all women b/c it's easier that way and will ensure that you are seen as negative and undesirable to date... well when 99% of women do it and thats all you see then all women are put in that catogory. its the same as women labeling all guys are dogs and they do it all the time Neil 99% is a completely inaccurate and exaggerated statement... not inacurrate in california it's inaccurate ANYWHERE you don't have statistical data to back it up and it would be impossible to collect b/c it's unrealistic and inaccurate... Oops I guess I started this but complete generalizations are not fair to anyone.

singmesweet Joined Mon 07/28/08 Posts: 26661	Thu 07/16/09 05:56 AM
Why do women say they want men to be honest and then get pissed when they are? This is completely from experience! I wish more men would be honest. Sure, the truth can hurt, but it's better than being lied to.

luckyguy2008 Joined Sat 12/27/08 Posts: 492	Thu 07/16/09 07:04 AM
Why do women say they want men to be honest and then get pissed when they are? This is completely from experience! I wish more men would be honest. Sure, the truth can hurt, but it's better than being lied to. That is what I thought too, but it is very confusing!