As the paerent you need to do what is in the best interest of your son. If child was born out of wedlock then mother automatically has custody. My advice would be to come up with some kind of visitation rights that YOU are comfortable with and what will be best for your son. When your son gets old enough to make his own informed decisions then let him decide what kind of relationship he wants with his father.
As a single parent myself i understand the difficulties you have to face. Before making any major decision i consider how that decision will affect my children. A father figure that visits when he feels like it isn't healthy for your childs mental health in my opinion. The father needs to work on building your trust and your sons trust.

Good luck with your son and have faith in yourself.

Just say NO!!

Ur story makes me grateful for the fact that my son's father lives over a 1,000 miles away. I honestly predict that he's gonna drop right back outta ur son's life with a gf like that. If any man is gonna let the gf dictate to him how he sees his children, then u can purty much bet he's not gonna stick around. She is showin her childish immature side by her behavior. If she truly loved the man she would encourage a relationship between father an son. You love the man, ur gonna love the children, plain an simple.

from op



if you saved the correspondence from the gf that says she does not want the son in her house

then you are not the bad girl she is the one refusing him to have him over night not you

after all if she does not want him there what may she do to prevent him from wanting to be there



if he lives there it is the gf house the gf does not want son there then son should not go there

plane and simple

he needs a place of his own for visitation or needs to go to motel

till then the gf is the one stopping the visits not you

just a thought

but hey

what do i know