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Topic: why is nice overlooked/frowned upon in dating with both gend
no photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:13 PM
Edited by Krycek09 on Thu 06/04/09 04:15 PM
A lot of men complain that women just want jerks to act hot and cold, play with their emotions, and treat them badly, but I'd argue that men are shallow as well when it comes to nice women.

I used to overlook perfectly cute, above average looking nice girls, but I was also inexperienced and didn't realize that a cute, nice girl is better than a really sexy, snobby girl. A lot of guys are experienced, realize this, but still go for the sexy/snobby type.

And women, I'm convinced a lot of them are just f***ed up in the head, have high egos but low-self esteem and want some trophy really good looking guy to show off to their friends and society who treats them bad. Some like being treated bad, but a lot of them will take the really good bad boy looks over an average/cute/not so tough looking guy that doesn't treat them like ****.

My question is, what's so bad about being unconditionally nice? If anything, the few women I've went on dates with were sexier to me because they were somewhat attractive and genuinely nice people. I can imagine sex with a really hot woman being good, but is the prospect of it worth putting up with a bad person on the inside? Same for women...I know you women are attracted to muscles and bad boy looks, but at the cost of not being treated like a person?

no photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:15 PM
just one thing....just because someone looks hot....does NOT mean they are good in bed....that is all I have to saybigsmile bigsmile bigsmile

MirrorMirror's photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:17 PM
:smile: "Nice Guys" usually arnt very nice at all once you get to know them.:smile:

Gumbyvs's photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:17 PM
Short answer, nice isn't exciting. But you're arguments are sound, but hey, that's reality.


But what about the funny guys huh? They're always in the "friend zone", because they are funny. But almost every woman wants a funny guy as an SO, but usually don't settle for one.

Gossipmpm's photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:18 PM

:smile: "Nice Guys" usually arnt very nice at all once you get to know them.:smile:


That is VERY true!!

lonetar25's photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:18 PM

just one thing....just because someone looks hot....does NOT mean they are good in bed....that is all I have to saybigsmile bigsmile bigsmile

r you sayin your rubbish in bed kimlaugh laugh flowerforyou

no photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:18 PM
So basically you are saying many of us are shallow? I'm shocked and outraged! surprised

Atlantis75's photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:19 PM

just one thing....just because someone looks hot....does NOT mean they are good in bed....that is all I have to saybigsmile bigsmile bigsmile


I can confirm this also.

7z3r05's photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:19 PM
it isnt looked down upon. others just dont appreciate the whining.

no photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:19 PM
It's a matter of context and interpretation.

If you're talking about "nice," as in "considerate, understanding, giving," etc., then I don't think too many people would see it as a problem.

Here's the problem:

The "nice guy" threads we sometimes have here -- they often have a sort of melodramatic "woe is me!" tinge to them -- i.e., "I'm such a nice guy, why can't I get a date?"

In this context, "Nice" equates to "whiny annoying loser."

Not trying to cast aspersions on anyone, just clarifying.

The search for someone "nice" is certainly a valid pursuit, albeit many of us prefer to use a different descriptive term.

The "nice guy" threads, however, continue to be met with something very close to universal disdain.

WolfEyez's photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:21 PM


just one thing....just because someone looks hot....does NOT mean they are good in bed....that is all I have to saybigsmile bigsmile bigsmile


I can confirm this also.


As do I. Also, there is such a thing as too nice of a person.

auburngirl's photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:21 PM
I am nice AND exciting! :tongue:

steven27rb's photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:23 PM
because women say they want one thing,but in truth they have no idea what they really want.embarassed sorry laides

no photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:23 PM


..i think as years go by and experience is gained ,eventually you compile enough information as to what kind of person would truly make you happy...too bad by this time you are too old and tired to go looking for them...freakin' life...laugh

auburngirl's photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:23 PM

because women say they want one thing,but in truth they have no idea what they really want.embarassed sorry laides


noway

lonetar25's photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:23 PM
ive always thought that a gentleman never says he is a gentleman.
thats for you to find out!

WolfEyez's photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:23 PM

I am nice AND exciting! :tongue:


And you also look like my friend Connie. I thought you were her the first time I saw you in the forums so I just had to check out your profile. Its amazing because she could be your twin. And I'm dead serious

MirrorMirror's photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:24 PM

It's a matter of context and interpretation.

If you're talking about "nice," as in "considerate, understanding, giving," etc., then I don't think too many people would see it as a problem.

Here's the problem:

The "nice guy" threads we sometimes have here -- they often have a sort of melodramatic "woe is me!" tinge to them -- i.e., "I'm such a nice guy, why can't I get a date?"

In this context, "Nice" equates to "whiny annoying loser."

Not trying to cast aspersions on anyone, just clarifying.

The search for someone "nice" is certainly a valid pursuit, albeit many of us prefer to use a different descriptive term.

The "nice guy" threads, however, continue to be met with something very close to universal disdain.





flowerforyou I think the idea is that "Nice Guy" is something other people are supposed to call a guy,not something a guy should call himself.bigsmile It just seems kind of shady.flowerforyou Niceness is something a person shows and not just says about themselvesflowerforyou

DRUGSTORE's photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:25 PM
what

Kuuleinani's photo
Thu 06/04/09 04:25 PM

A lot of men complain that women just want jerks to act hot and cold, play with their emotions, and treat them badly, but I'd argue that men are shallow as well when it comes to nice women.

I used to overlook perfectly cute, above average looking nice girls, but I was also inexperienced and didn't realize that a cute, nice girl is better than a really sexy, snobby girl. A lot of guys are experienced, realize this, but still go for the sexy/snobby type.

And women, I'm convinced a lot of them are just f***ed up in the head, have high egos but low-self esteem and want some trophy really good looking guy to show off to their friends and society who treats them bad. Some like being treated bad, but a lot of them will take the really good bad boy looks over an average/cute/not so tough looking guy that doesn't treat them like ****.

My question is, what's so bad about being unconditionally nice? If anything, the few women I've went on dates with were sexier to me because they were somewhat attractive and genuinely nice people. I can imagine sex with a really hot woman being good, but is the prospect of it worth putting up with a bad person on the inside? Same for women...I know you women are attracted to muscles and bad boy looks, but at the cost of not being treated like a person?
I have never judged a book by its cover, its always the inside that gets to me. Honestly the hod bod for me is a turn off because I know majority of the time it comes with a me attitude....

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