you go out with someone an they look the part, but theres just something missing, so you kiss finally and then it hits ya there is no chemistry, do you tell them right them or do you leave an don't speak to them again. What do you do when there is no chemistry with the person you just went out with

If he reaches out again, just be honest with him. No need to be rude and run from him, just tell him you didn't feel any chemistry.

ALWAYS be up front with what you feel. It's better to be up front and tell the other person what the deal is than to jerk him or her around. Doing the latter is just reeks of no class.

I know what you are saying.......so hard to tell them..

I went out with a guy for a long time, trying to make chemistry, cause he was perfect, in every way, but the spark was not there, finally I had to do the right thing, let him go. I don't miss him, I guess that's not normal, when you don't miss someone.

act like a jerk and they will leave you alone

I think that's perfectly normal. It means it wasn't meant to be.


To the OP.....don't ya just hate it when you really wish there could be chemistry and there just isn't? I think he'll appreciate you telling him that the spark just isn't there.

when in doubt whip it out

I think it's either there or it isn't. You can't fake chemistry. They would just become a friend.

There's nothing wrong with telling someone you're just not feeling the sparks. I know when you are a sensitive person it's difficult to say because you are trying to spare their feelings, especially if they ARE feeling sparks.

Really though, if anyone expects everyone they kiss to feel those sparks they are delusional and no amount of dressing it up in pretty language is going to spare their feelings. Likewise if they expect everyone to feel them when they do.

Most people are aware of the fact that some people will and some won't be a connection for them. Isn't it better to find out right away that someone is not, rather than drag it out and possibly build up hopes?

You tell him straight out

No pokin round!

Just tell the dude that you don't feel that it is going to work out. He'll either bow out gracefully or whine like a b1tch.

this didn't happen to me, I am a straight to the point person if I like ya I tell ya if I don't I will tell ya that to

I asked this question to see how many people would tell me what they would do if there was no chemistry with the person that in other words would be perfect

Cangel,

I met a man around 2001 that everyone thought was so perfect for me. He was nice, funny, a hard worker, honest, all the things you'd look for in a S.O or even a friend. My Mother Loved him. But "it" was not there. I finally told her that SHE should go marry him! But I didn't want to settle even though he was/is a great guy. I guess I want it all. We remained good friends until he moved. No contact in years now.

And yes, I did tell him, That I only saw us as friends.

Sometimes they are slow in building. Sometimes you just know, no.

Sometimes it's the opposite...great chemistry and no chance of anything beyond the spark. Not sure which scenario is more disappointing!

That always sucks. If he has chemistry with you then it really sucks.

I say just tell him as gently as you can without being mean about it and offer friendship.

Most guys take this as the kiss of death for a relationship anyway so they usually let it alone.

Yeah, the "Kiss of Death" is always on the cheek.

Awwwww, yea it is

To avoid an embarrassing situation at that point, I would not tell them right then. I would leave, but would not wait for them to get ahold of me. I would get ahold of them and tell them either by phone, letter, or email that it was nothing that either of us did or did not do. The chemistry was just not there, but hopefully we could remain friends.