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| Topic: Ladies, please evaluate my profile | |
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Just ladies please.
Thanks, Bob |
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Edited by
Lilypetal
on
Sun 04/19/09 10:54 AM
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You sure? Last guy got ripped to shreds.
I would make your commentary more conversational.. Although, it may appeal to the list makers on these forums.  More pics. |
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Lilypetal,
Thanks for your advice. Yes, I'm sure. I would prefer something constructive, like what you wrote, to being ripped to shreds. I don't have any more digital pictures of me, and I don't have a scanner or a digital camera. Should I add a Spanish or Portuguese section? I think I'd be more conversational in those languages, especially now that you've gotten me thinking about it. I've already been messaged by a South American that lived in Brazil. Bob-Tuba |
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Add whatever fits you and the type of woman you want best.
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Simply add in things you want people to know of you off the bat... and add in things you are looking to accomplish through this site... more pics would be nice that are different then the ones you have on already.. that can wait though.. best of luck to you and welcome...
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Thank you Lilypetal and SimplyElla.
Lilypetal, I see you recommend that I add the type of woman I want best. That could seriously cause women, that don't fit that description, to eliminate themselves. I might be very interested in them. I'm not sure what kind of woman I want. There are a lot of different types that interest me, but two that don't. I used to have smokers blocked from messaging me, but I don't really want that -- just eliminated from dating me! A woman that I would like -- especially if she's Latin American -- would be honest and open. I can't put that in a negative way. That would make my profile negative. Few women would eliminate themselves, because who considers themselves sneaky and deceitful? (what ruined my marriage) They're just adjectives, anyway -- fluff. Bob |
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Edited by
MelodyGirl
on
Sun 04/19/09 12:38 PM
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Hi
 The first thing I would suggest is getting new pix. The one you are using as your main doesn't show your face. Since that is the first representation of your profile, you need to post a pic that will inspire someone to view your profile. A pix of your legs won't cut it!   Also, the other cropped version of that pix is so small and pixilated that your face is not clear. There is a lot of discussion on this next suggestion which is NOT posting pix of kids in your profile. I'm not sure if that is your kid or not (doesn't matter) but kids on an adult dating site? Dating should be about YOU and not kids. Kids shouldn't even come into the situation until you are serious about someone (if that is your child). You indicated you had kids in the stats area and that should be enough for an internet full of strangers. Since you already have 2 other versions of the same pic, you should just delete that one. Adults should protect kids and not necessarily over expose them. Add something about the type of lady you wish to meet and date. You did a good job of highlighting your interests but expand a little more. Again, you want to create excitement in your profile! There are thousands of profiles on Mingle. How will you stand out from the rest? Even though your statement about 'needing' love to complete is true, you may want to edit that out of your profile. To me, it screams 'needy'! A relationship should compliment you; not complete you. Adults should not feel like something is missing if they are single. That is just my .02 though. I hope you take my suggestions as friendly because that is how I intended them.  Remember, market yourself and enjoy the site!  Add more pix though so the ladies can see different view of you. |
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not ever1 can handle latina 's btw if u can't handle the sass we don't want u
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Bob, see? That main is waaay better, yes???
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More pics and more about what kind of person you are looking for.
Good Luck and have fun! |
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Wow, MelodyGirl! Thanks!
I never realized the website was cutting off my head to make a thumbnail! I'll keep experimenting with cropping the photo until I get as much of me as possible, without it cutting my head off. Yes, I take your suggestions as friendly -- and giving! Thank you for your time! If I ever have more pictures of me, I *promise* I'll upload them. Right now, this one is all I have! You wrote, "You did a good job of highlighting your interests but expand a little more." By "expand", do you mean I should add in *more interests*, or describe them in *more detail*? Thanks for letting me know about the possible "needy" perception. Did I tone it down enough? I got the "Less Independent" award on OKCupid. I've noticed that a *lot* of Latin Americans on OKCupid have this award. This only confirms something I noticed long ago. Americans are more independent than Latin Americans. I don't consider the 'award' a negative. I consider it a positive, but I certainly don't want to come off as "needy". I personally *like* it when I see it. When I see the "More Independent" 'award, I think: "She doesn't need me." I want someone who really, really, really wants me! The woman singing, Be a person "that needs people," comes to mind. I'm just the type that believes in love, romance, passion, thrill, excitement, and admitting being a flesh-and-blood human being. I'm not going to go the rest of my life without someone to share it with. Not if *I* have anything to say about it. Yes, I want someone enough to consider that I "need" someone -- not as much as air, food and water -- but I can't love or be loved by an inanimate object. So I "need" a woman, because this is something I want in my life. I intend to pursue it. I hope we can agree to disagree, because I really appreciate how your giving nature resulted in you helping a total stranger. I consider, "Adults should not feel like something is missing if they are single," an opinion. Moving on, you wrote, "Add something about the type of lady you wish to meet and date." The ladies I like are athletic, thin, fat, short, tall, medium, all colors, races, national origins, college graduates, high school dropouts -- and age is just a number to me. See my problem? I want an honest, polite, classy nonsmoker that's a good person. A mother that's not a good mother has about as much of a chance with me as she does getting blood out of a turnip. I can't put stuff like this on my profile. It'll come off as negative, and it'll get me nowhere, because nobody's going to decide they're not a "good person." "Honest, polite, classy," "good person" -- it's just fluff. Who's going to say, "I'd better not message him, because I'm not honest, polite or classy?" I might get messages from women that like it that I *want* this, but that's not the result I'd be looking for. You should critique résumés for a living. You're great! Bob |
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SimplyElla,
Thank you for your welcoming reply! I tried to start with what makes me me. I know it's like a list, but I started off with things like, Long Island, Brazil, Spanish and Portuguese. The things I wrote tend to have been caused by these influences, and distinguish me (to various degrees) from other men: Open and honest: Long Island Chivalrous: Brazil Intense relationships that are full of love: Latin America Nice: Latin America Friendly: Brazil Independent vs interdependent: Anerica vs. Latin America We're all equal: Mexico You wrote, "add in things you are looking to accomplish through this site." The byline, "Looking for woman for relationship," isn't enough? Bob |
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Edited by
MelodyGirl
on
Sun 04/19/09 02:08 PM
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Wow, MelodyGirl! Thanks! I never realized the website was cutting off my head to make a thumbnail! I'll keep experimenting with cropping the photo until I get as much of me as possible, without it cutting my head off. Yes, I take your suggestions as friendly -- and giving! Thank you for your time! If I ever have more pictures of me, I *promise* I'll upload them. Right now, this one is all I have! You wrote, "You did a good job of highlighting your interests but expand a little more." By "expand", do you mean I should add in *more interests*, or describe them in *more detail*? Thanks for letting me know about the possible "needy" perception. Did I tone it down enough? I got the "Less Independent" award on OKCupid. I've noticed that a *lot* of Latin Americans on OKCupid have this award. This only confirms something I noticed long ago. Americans are more independent than Latin Americans. I don't consider the 'award' a negative. I consider it a positive, but I certainly don't want to come off as "needy". I personally *like* it when I see it. When I see the "More Independent" 'award, I think: "She doesn't need me." I want someone who really, really, really wants me! The woman singing, Be a person "that needs people," comes to mind. I'm just the type that believes in love, romance, passion, thrill, excitement, and admitting being a flesh-and-blood human being. I'm not going to go the rest of my life without someone to share it with. Not if *I* have anything to say about it. Yes, I want someone enough to consider that I "need" someone -- not as much as air, food and water -- but I can't love or be loved by an inanimate object. So I "need" a woman, because this is something I want in my life. I intend to pursue it. I hope we can agree to disagree, because I really appreciate how your giving nature resulted in you helping a total stranger. I consider, "Adults should not feel like something is missing if they are single," an opinion. Moving on, you wrote, "Add something about the type of lady you wish to meet and date." The ladies I like are athletic, thin, fat, short, tall, medium, all colors, races, national origins, college graduates, high school dropouts -- and age is just a number to me. See my problem? I want an honest, polite, classy nonsmoker that's a good person. A mother that's not a good mother has about as much of a chance with me as she does getting blood out of a turnip. I can't put stuff like this on my profile. It'll come off as negative, and it'll get me nowhere, because nobody's going to decide they're not a "good person." "Honest, polite, classy," "good person" -- it's just fluff. Who's going to say, "I'd better not message him, because I'm not honest, polite or classy?" I might get messages from women that like it that I *want* this, but that's not the result I'd be looking for. You should critique résumés for a living. You're great! Bob Hi Bob! Actually, I am a document editor as part of my graduate program! I absolutely see your conflict in listing the type of lady that interests you. Maybe narrow it down to a lifestyle? Rather than being perfunctory in appearance (age, weight, hair, etc), list the type of lady that suits your personality and lifestyle: homebody, adventurous, travel bunny, sarcastic, quiet, brainy, etc. I also agree that listing the 'no drama', 'no games', and other fluff is useless. Being too specific might eliminate a few; however, isn't the point of being on a dating site to attract the RIGHT person from the start? Isn't the best part of knowing what you want is to eliminate what you don't want? For example, you are in the grocery story, and someone catches your eye. You flirt, ask her out, and maybe on the 2nd, 3rd or 4th date you find out too many things about her that do not appealing to you. Well, with a dating site, you can express these things NOW. If a women doesn't fit into what you are looking for then neither of you are wasting your time. I agree that there is a fine line between being too detailed and being too vague. You will retool your profile many times anyway -- trust me! Look at my profile!  I am the queen of detail and specifics. The upside is that I only attract the RIGHT person for me. My replies are limitied but the are quaity replies! I am not sifting through a bunch of emails that will go no where. This style of online dating falls into the category of quality over quantity!! I love reading the forums, and I appreciate my friends on Mingle. My profile, however, suits a purpose for dating separate from the forums. I don't care to waste my time with silly "How are you?" messages that go no where. I am about action! I don't want an internet boyfriend. If I get too many 'fluff' emails then I just don't reply anymore.
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