Scott Bakula?

wouldn't know how to mend a broken heart with all the patches and band-aids in the world

there's also something in ez's pants that's quantum

quan⋅tum   /ˈkwɒntəm/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [kwon-tuhm]

4. a large quantity; bulk.

Damn skippy



Stole that necklace from an Egyptian tomb

The only thing "quantum" in his pants would be the rolled up pair of designer socks.

at least they're designer socks

probably broke that heart herself

doesn't know that Quantum mechanics is a set of principles underlying the most fundamental known description of all physical systems at the submicroscopic scale (at the atomic level). Thus quantum phenomena are particularly relevant in systems whose dimensions are close to the atomic scale, such as molecules, atoms, electrons, protons and other subatomic particles.

Measurement · Uncertainty
Exclusion · Duality
Decoherence · Ehrenfest theorem · Tunneling

IE: YOU'VE GOT A TINY JOHNSTON

Has men chained up in her basement to use for her pleasure.

Charges admission to see the men chained up in the basements

Is a roadie for ZZ Top

Secretly likes the guy above her.

Still sleeps on his superman sheets from when he was a kid.

SMOKES CRACK WITH WINTEY HOUSTON

Habitually blames others for her crack addiction with Whitney.

Had her number changed to 8675309!

gambling addiction

that's not a rumour! But I still say Peeping tom =)

seeking help for his strip solitaire addiction

Secretly has a thing for the Unibomber.

Has a secret stash of plutonium.

trying to start up his flux capacitor on his Delorean