The guy I share an apt with has recently divorced. He's bitter, and even
though he's a young guy (mid 20s, very fit) he's taken up a very hard
edge about romance.

We were talking the other day, and he said that he was demanding a
'dowry' of any serious potential "next-wife". I thought he was just
being foul, but, he was serious. Worse, he's getting traction with his
idea. The idea goes like this:

He states the obvious: women have a strong financial incentive to work,
marry/divorce, collect alimony/child-support, re-marry and repeat. He's
not saying that they purposefully do this, but, it clearly works to
their benefit.

So, Jim feels that to counter that incentive, he wants a dowry to be
paid (approx $25k to $10k), and a pre-nup agreement drawn up to help
shelter his liability.

I laughed and called him a misogynist nut, "C'mon Jim no woman is going
to even consider that"

"You're right Mike. No woman that I want to deal with. Now, I've been
dating several women already, and they're completely aware of my
feelings on this. A couple dissapeared expectedly. Now, the ones who are
foreigners are considering this as a business arrangement."

I was really surprised. He's dating several lovely ladies, all VERY VERY
educated foreign women, who are aware of his "Dowry" plans. They seem
perfectly OK with the idea of marrying for citizen-ship, and enjoying
his company in the mean time.

...whataya all think?

i can understand his concerns--but it can go the other way too.

good luck to him, I'd like to check back with him in 20 years and see
how well that worked for him

Well the women's family is supposed to pay for the wedding, from what I
understand, and that is supposed to take care of dowries.

Anything after that, like pre-nups, is just greedy but needed. I heard
many tails about ladies marring and divorcing for profit.

That is why I will hire a lawyer when I get married just in case, I
don't my life stripped in half by one foul moment in time with my wife.

However, I think that it is my feeling on this subject and kids that
keeps me single.

Honestly Mike, if it works for your friend and he wants to live in a
hollow relationship that has monetary values at the core than I say more
power to him; but that isn't the kind of life I would want.

Yes I would get a pre - nup but I wouldn't make her pay any dowrie at
the begining, that just isn't right...

A wedding is ridiculously expensive to begin with...

Best of luck to you and your friend;

LANTZ

i hate to break it to you all.. but .. i mean i honestly don't know but
if hes yoru roommate i doubt hes loaded with money.. otherwise he'd
have his own mansion.. and no... alimony.. child support give me a
break.. unless your husband is rich that ain't gonna do to much for you
so sorry it takes two people to make a marriage fail not just one...
and wanting the alimony check isn't the womans desire, and i agree
weddings these days cost like... geeze 30k ... but what about all the
women who have been faithful to their husbands who sleep with their
secretaries or blah blah blah... this situation goes both ways trust me
i think we've all expierienced the lovliness of the opposite sex.. tell
him to grow up my advice.

A-MEN

Survey Says.....

Not likely to fly. Thanks for all your input, I teased him tonite
throwing in your comments!

-Mike

gee, i'm MUCH better off since i divorced...i gave up my career in order
to make certain my children had a parent with them every night...make
about a third of what i used to...and get my rent paid each month in
child support, maybe.

and children are SOOO great for social life.