I'm a 29 year old black women i thing i am nice looking I have a lot going for my self I am a chef I love to work i have a nice job a house and a car i can take care of myself But i can not seam to find a nice man to spend time with and get to know Most men in my town r scared a way beacuse I have 3 kids not even giving me a chance to tell them i am widowed.Most of think i keep have kid by different men not ask me I was married for 12 years every since i was a teen so it is hard for me to get back in the dateing world I would love some advice.......

Just keep being you.Sorry for your loss.Welcome to the site.Join in the forums a lot of great people here.Good luck

i'm a 38 year old white man and i have been judged as many things and you wanna know what i think.....FTW

FTW!!

Now..does that stand for f*** the world? or f*** the women? LOL jk

I'd move!!!

interpret anyway you see fit

Relax and try to have fun.......I lost mine 4 years ago........I just got over it! You're gonna be alright!

Yea, I think I'd rather go with the latter lately LOL...btw.. \m/ Maiden \m/

Just be patient. I've had my fair share of shallow women the last few years. As you see I've been on here since 2007 and I'm not even close to finding her!

FTW=Flush the Water, get rid of old crap in your life.

-or-

Flush The Waste

For The Win!

Just keep being you. Someone will walk in to your life one day and they will be the perfect fit for you and your children.

Don't get caught up in looking for a man - it sounds like you have control over your life. It is hard, but don't loose sight of what is in front of you.

God Bless...

Be happy being alone...most the other things seem to fall together easily after that.

**Moderator edit**


*edit (oops) for the nice woman that started the thread (the above comment has nothing to do with you by the way lol): Most people have difficulty being with someone for a few years much less 12! So kudos to that and sorry to hear about your loss... But you definitely got what it takes to keep a man and I know you will find a good one eventually!

Patience has its virtues. Just try to be patient. Never settle.

Don't automatically assume you're doing anything wrong -- a lot of times, it's just circumstances, bad luck, bad timing, a lot of things. Doesn't have to be your fault in any way whatsoever. Don't rush into anything, and keep in mind that you're not alone in having a hard time finding someone decent....!

First of all get rid of the defeatist attitude. That is like shooting yourself in the foot right before a big race. I do understand what it is like getting back into the swing of things. I was single 12 years after my husband passed away. Then jumped into a horrible stupid marriage.

If the men that you have been interested in are slamming you with all these assumptions why would you want them? I tell people all the time if you don't place a value on yourself,then how can someone else.

I made a decision a long time ago, I figured out what I was worth and have stuck to it. I should end up a lone so be it. I am not going to short change who and what I am.

My advice is to get out there in some single clubs. Enjoy like and honestly I have found when I am not looking that is usually when I meet the awesome guys.