About 10yrs ago, my best friend's man hit on me...heavy. I read him the riot act & put a stop to it immediately. I mentioned it to no one. A couple weeks later, my best friend was telling me that another of her friends said that he had hit on her, but then added to the story: "Well, you know how Judy is...always making something big out of nothing..."

I decided to tell her what happened to me & long story short...she believed her man & our friendship ended. There's more to the story, but I'm trying to make it breif...

Question: Do you believe in your friends who you've known for years...or your (cheating) SO? If you're in the situation, do you tell...or keep your mouth shut no matter what else happens?

You did the right thing.

That dude was an IDIOT.

I wouldn't keep my mouth shut but then I just dont have those kind of manners. If my friend never spoke to me again then so be it. But I wouldnt facilitate my friend getting screwed over

Hummm I did believe them and well they were right.

But then when my girlfriend and her hubby split she accused me of sleeping with her ex. Which never happened and told her so even though I had the chance I turned him down due to my friendship with his ex. But still got accused in the end a second time from her. At that time I ended the relationship with her. Shshs

Moral of the story no matter what side of the situation your on your damned if you do and damned if you don't!!

Ohh and we had been friends for 10 years as well.

I try to stay out of these situations.

Believe your friend. Always. (I love u deb!)

Hey man...who doesn't? But you can't help it if it's thrust upon you...

Years ago, because of my military obligations, I did a nice breakup with a wwoman I was involved with at that time. I introduced her to a friend of mine, and they married a year later. As the years went by, we remained friends, but she would hit on me everytime I would go home. I never said anything to her husband (my friend). One time I came back and found her beaten so bad, I could hardly recognize her. I went out and found my (now ex) friend, and ..."convinced" him to never see her again, and he hasn't. She told me later that she only knew me as a safe and comfortable person, and that is why she hit on me. She said that if I would have told him, she believes he would have killed her. Sometimes, silence is golden. She is still my great friend after 35 years. Every issue is different, and it is a coin toss to tell or not tell.

tell and if they were your true friend they would believe you and stay your friend if not then how good of a friend could they have been anyway

...ok. Well you're not going to want my advice then because the last freinds that pulled this crap on me and put me in the middle of their vengeance against each other driven domestic? I went over and punched them both in the nose and haven't seen them since. Good riddance. If I was in your shoes- there would be 2 busted noses and 4 black eyes in their house. Everytime they looked at each others black eyes maybe just maybe they may realize how stupid they both were. They don't deserve your freindship. And you don't deserve their drama.

I don't keep my mouth shut... Its better, imo, to have a friend who will tell you the truth, when the truth will come out anyway.

I know my friend believed me when I told her, and I know it hurt her.. but she was better off knowing what a sleaze he was..

when i was in the army i had a friend who was married. while he was out in the field his wife would call me to hang out. nothing ever happened but at times i felt like she was hitting on me. i told him about it and things between him and me were never the same.


i may have been wrong about the flirting, but i don't think i was wrong in the telling. it's unfortunate that things went the way they did, but i wouldn't change what i did.



. . .

You're correct about her not deserving my friendship...& me not deserving the drama...it happened 10yrs ago (after a 20yr friendship)...but at times (like today) I do think about it & lament the loss of the friendship I "thought" I had...

Not me I sing like a bird

You know I use to think the same thing about the friendship that I lost too. But.......then ya know it made me think what kind of a friendship was it really when they don't believe a word you say but then your suppose to believe them?

Hummm figured it must not have been all I thought it was after all!!

That's so true, Txsgal...it's funny how we miss (more) the friendships we forged early in our lives... Disillusionment sucks...but a lousey friend blows even more...

It sounds like a no win situation from the start....ya should have put out and at least got laid out of the deal if you were gonna lose your friend anyway.....heheheheehehe....I know, BAD KRUPA!!!

Krupa...it has indeed been a long time since I sent you to your crate...I hear JoJo is floating around somewhere...you two will make excellent cell-mates...

Soooooooo.....hey babe....since Que2 ain't lookin...howza bouta quicky?

I will settle for oral if you ain't willing to make with the nooky.

hehehehehehe...the beauty of this is that you can't prove any of this to Phuque2...muahahaha....oh...wait a minute!...CRAP!

My best friend told me about my wife cheating. Although she'd never hit on him. He was so worried how I'd take it and that we wouldn't be friends anymore.

If you really know your "friend", then you really know whether to believe them or not.

I'm sorry you lost your friend, but maybe she wasn't that good a friend to begin with.