Recollections of the past promote my destructive thoughts.
These sinister schemes are guised by a veil of disinterest but
My betraying eyes would adore to openly expose how much I
Resent you,
Despise you,
How I am absolutely exasperated by you,and what I have become.

Your disregard makes me consider violent acts of retribution
And I embrace them completely
I am encouraged to perform each and every single action upon you
But yet, I wonder
Should my desires be satisfied or delayed?
The concept of committing myself to forget it all
As enviable and necessary it would be for myself to move on
It continues to elude my grasp.

You hate me
This much I know,
But no more than I hate you when I become
Repulsed by the syllables of your new name
Disgusted by the stench of the new memories you create that exclude me
Sickened by the residue of your unerasable presence in my life

And here you are with your
Amusing smiles and
Pleasurable laughter...
You have become a distinguished and celebrated woman...
Me a known artist in the music industry
And my success aggravates your existence.

Realize that if it weren't for me
You would not be able to smile at who you once were
And say you are better because of it
You would not be able to laugh at the mistakes you made
And say you have learned and risen above it

I was always here before you ever came along
But I know that I am now just a peripheral shadow of who you once chose to be with ....
And your light blinds me.
You would not be this independant woman you are today
If you didn't ever met me

I see you
Even though you don't always see me
At least, not the way you used to...
We did love each other for a time
and you gave me the most precious
gift in life... a son!
don't be selfish i am here to
and i need him as much as you..


But you won't ever forget me
Regardless of what you become or accomplish
Because I will always be here in your past
and the voice inside your head will never
rest until you share what is ours ,my son