Topic: "Hon" and "Dear" terms | |
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Just consider the opposite end of the spectrum.....If I was from up north...I would probably refer to you ladies as "Youse guys" or "You'ns"...If I had been raised with no sense of respect, it would be "b*!ches" or "Ho's" (I hate it when guys talk like that...shows a total lack of respect) So, all things considered...there are plenty of worse references "Dear" or "Hon" Just my perspective Baby....(since I don't know most of your names...I gotta call you something...and it ain't gonna be Ma'am) But, I do understand your point.....the only way I can see around it is to issue name tags to everyone..... I never called strangers by cute little names. I'd find out their names and use that. If it's friends, it's different. It's a familiarity thing. |
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i like to use pet names when talking to women both in "real life" and online i don't think it's disrespectful if a woman can't handle them that says more about her insecurities as a woman than it does about me being a gentleman be seeing you
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i like to use pet names when talking to women both in "real life" and online i don't think it's disrespectful if a woman can't handle them that says more about her insecurities as a woman than it does about me being a gentleman be seeing you Not at all. Like I said, it's a familiarity thing. If someone doesn't know me, find out my name and use that. It's not a hard thing to do. |
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Just consider the opposite end of the spectrum.....If I was from up north...I would probably refer to you ladies as "Youse guys" or "You'ns"...If I had been raised with no sense of respect, it would be "b*!ches" or "Ho's" (I hate it when guys talk like that...shows a total lack of respect) So, all things considered...there are plenty of worse references "Dear" or "Hon" Just my perspective Baby....(since I don't know most of your names...I gotta call you something...and it ain't gonna be Ma'am) But, I do understand your point.....the only way I can see around it is to issue name tags to everyone..... It's funny you should say that about Ma'am. I get called that several times a day by people (except by the elderly) and I even say it myself, but I only do it out of respect as they are doing the same with me. As a matter of fact, some even expect you to say it to show respect because that is how they were brought up. Isn't it weird that in some areas, a certain reference is acceptable and in some cases, expected, but then you go to a whole different region, and those same references are considered as an insult. |
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i like to use pet names when talking to women both in "real life" and online i don't think it's disrespectful if a woman can't handle them that says more about her insecurities as a woman than it does about me being a gentleman be seeing you Not at all. Like I said, it's a familiarity thing. If someone doesn't know me, find out my name and use that. It's not a hard thing to do. |
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It occurs to me...this entire thing centers soley on the environments that we are accustomed to.
For me and the natives of Texas...being polite and good naturedly friendly happens without thought. When my brother brought his (now ex) wife from Iowa to meet the Krupa's...we thought it went great. As soon as she got on the plane she told my brother that she was "Never coming back to Texas because everyone was too nice and too friendly".........???????? Absolutely blew our minds. But, we aim to please and since she wished to be treated in an unfriendly manner...that is exactly what I did. |
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Yes, it's strange. If I were in a Georgia diner and someone wanted to get the waitress' attention, they'd yell, "Hey Girl"
If someone does that in Maine, it's an insult. |
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BTW, "Ma'am" or "Miss" are not an insult anywhere that I know of. They are respectful.
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I hate it when people call me m'am..
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BTW, "Ma'am" or "Miss" are not an insult anywhere that I know of. They are respectful. Tell that to New Yorkers. I offended lots of people up there by using Ma'am. |
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l was always taught that guys that call you that all the time are usually cheaters and they say those pet names to keep from calling you the wrong person's name. And low and behold, the guy l was with for 2 and a half years turned out to be just that....a cheater and sure enough, he used those pet names all the time.
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In some culturs it an insult to shake with the wrong hand.
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Edited by
krupa
on
Mon 02/23/09 07:01 AM
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Yes, it's strange. If I were in a Georgia diner and someone wanted to get the waitress' attention, they'd yell, "Hey Girl" If someone does that in Maine, it's an insult. Trust me on this Linda.....the older a woman is....the less offended she gets at the term "Girl"......especially the sweet birds who are pushing 70+. After a point...they apprecieate being spoken to like they did when they were younger. But, it helps if you are looking them in the eye with a laughing smile....instead of them trying to decypher emotionless black and white text. I use the term "Ma'am" strictly for business dealings. |
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If you go into areas of different cultures, you usually know what you're up against. After all, if you go into Harlem, you don't call people N and expect to survive, even if they call each other that. If you go to another country, you learn a little first.
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i like to use pet names when talking to women both in "real life" and online i don't think it's disrespectful if a woman can't handle them that says more about her insecurities as a woman than it does about me being a gentleman be seeing you It's not about insecurities at all. It's annoying. |
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I like those terms to be used only by the person with whom i'm involved romantically. I'll give southerners the benefit of the doubt, however, because I realize some of them use those words regularly and generally. If it's anyone else, it creeps me out. Being a southerner myself I do not mind the Hun and dear term because it is used quite frequently. It's the other ones like baby sweetheart and so on that get me |
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Are there any women out there who feel this way? When I meet a man online for a relationship, him calling me "Dear" or "Hon", feels like he's talking down to me. It feels condescending to me. I've been at the store and an 18 yr. old cashier will call me Hon. It makes me want to laugh. |
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Are there any women out there who feel this way? When I meet a man online for a relationship, him calling me "Dear" or "Hon", feels like he's talking down to me. i hate it...and if a guy says he loves someone to death...he doens't love them at all... |
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Are there any women out there who feel this way? When I meet a man online for a relationship, him calling me "Dear" or "Hon", feels like he's talking down to me. i hate it...and if a guy says he loves someone to death...he doens't love them at all... |
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Looks like we are in a Catch-22.....Apparently what is good naturedly polite to me, can be misconstrued as overtly familiar and rude.
To me, it just seems impolite to not use those terminologies to set someone at ease. Oh well, You ladies try not to get too offended When I talk the way I do....I ain't looking to get in any ones pants around here....just looking for intelligent conversations with cool cats and Babydolls. Peace |
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