Topic: Rules of Engagement..............Women
Tanzkity's photo
Tue 02/17/09 09:36 PM
this is how men really think............and whomever needs to add go ahead.........lol

. Men are NOT mind readers. We can try to guess but, we’ll get it wrong every time.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question. A No followed by a long explanation is just telling a man you want to argue with him about your answer.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy doesn’t help solve anything. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
So, if you don’t want to hear the answer please don’t ask the question.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us. We have programmed our selves to lie on this subject.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both...
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a melon. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. Don’t come right out of the blue and tell me I’m out of shape. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
You don’t want us to tell you that your fat, now do ya?

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, motor sports or fishin’.

1. Crying is plain out right blackmail to us, and you know it is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that. We like to be comfortable too.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl... If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the raise and fall of the tides.
Accept it like that, you can’t keep the tide from raising or falling or the cycle of the moon. The moon controls the tied.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like going camping to us.

Pass this to as many men as you can -
to give them a laugh.

Pass this to as many women as you can – most of them really need this educational material.


no photo
Tue 02/17/09 09:40 PM
LOL.....................laugh rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl laugh

74Drew's photo
Tue 02/17/09 10:34 PM
so true

i love the simplicity of it.