Is it possible to stay friends with someone that you really, really want to be with?

If they're all you think about, day and night... can you look past their wanting to be friends and waiting till the time is right...if the time is ever right... to progress to the next level?

When is too long to wait?

If you really care about them, do you date in the process... if they even suggested you do so while they don't date at all?

Even if you are dating, the first time you see that person kiss someone else, you realize how impossible it will be to care that much and watch that person date other people.

I think the pain of NOT being able to get into a relationship with said person would be too great. With that said, anything is possible- if the both of you REALLY do care for each other, then there'd be no trouble in stepping the nature of the relationship.

However, it can also be too much trouble for what its worth.

sure seems like it.

He was fine holding hands but then wouldn't let me cuddle. How do guys put up with this **** from women??

Your guess is as good as mine.

At any rate, you're faced with a choice- either continue with the relationship as it stands, or tell him how you feel and risk jeopardizing the relationship. Just be prepared to face the fact that your relationship will probably be in jeopardy to begin with.

I delt with this same situation about a year ago. I was dating someone for 3 months but she never considered us an item. We would cuddle to watch movies, hold hands when we went out and would see each other at least once a week (she lived 80 miles away). We weren't "dating" anyone else and were practically in a relationship without the title; and we weren't sexually intimate and never kissed.

Long story short, I made my intentions/desires known (I wanted a relationship) and she couldn't offer that so we stopped talking. I still miss her to this day (she's a wonderful person) but I realize that it couldn't/wouldn't work under those circumstances.

Letting go kind of sucks, but you can't put your life on hold while they figure out what exactly they want.

I was in this situation last year. It's not a good idea, make it known, but prepare yourself because if they don't feel the same it's a long and hard fall. Good news though. I'm talking to the person again, and it seems she might be wanting something out of it this time. SO, just put it out there and go with what happens. If they don't feel it now maybe they will later like the person I'm talking to did.

Yes, date other people in the mean time. You'll either learn to appreciate that person more, or find someone that seems to be more of a fit and return the feeling.

I'm good friends with someone who I once wanted to be involved with romantically.

You just either accept what they are capable of offering and be happy with it, or you move on.

I think that he was initially uncomfortable with maintaining our friendship (which had existed for years) but I assured him - honestly - that I was perfectly okay with his lack of romantic interest.

At some point those feelings do taper off.

i think it is an exercise in frustration. if you are strongly attracted to him but he just does not feel that way about you then i really think you need to let him go - for your own sake. if you maintain the friendship always hoping for more and it doesn't happen - then you might not be emotionally available when another man comes along - someone who might well be a better partner for you.

it is better to stop interacting with him and work on other friendships and date others when you are ready...eventually, you may find that you are over him and will be ready to be friends on an equal footing...but if the feelings are lopsided then it is not a good thing.

If you are past your mid twenties and someone is just a strictly plutonic friend after roughly a hundred days they are not into you and probably never will be. Move on. Just be sure that when you do become romantic that you are both protected. NEVER leave the responsibility to your partner. And keep the kids out of the picture until you make it official. Just because you are doing the deed now or then you don't need to shack up and get yourself in something you can't get yourself out of for at least a year. If someone sticks around that long they are not just in you they are more than likely really into you and that is two different things.

Friends withOUT benefits? What's that?

This person has expressed having romantic feelings for you, you have feelings for them, but they just want to be friends to take it slow.

No physical contact other than handholding and hugs.

You're friends, you're dating only each other, but you're not getting any physical gratification whatsoever... hence the title, Friends Without Benefits.

Yup. That's "Friends Without Benefits" all right.

Maybe he is just really, really, really slow, or he's just not that into you.

slow, yes... "not into me" is not the case.. in fact he said this morning that he "adores" me. So yeah. It's just dealing with the whole thing of not knowing how much time it will take.

I know lots of people feel my pain.

I DO BELIEVE THAT THIS MIGHT BE A QUESTION THAT YOU MAY NOT LIKE THE ANSWER TO.YOU SHOULD PROBIBALLY USE WHAT YOU GOT TO MAKE THIS PERSON REALIZE WHAT HE/SHE MIGHT BE MISSING OUT ON.I ALSO THINK THAT NEVER WOULD BE THE ANSWER FOR A PERSON THAT YOU REALLY & TRUELY LOVE.YOU NEED TO WATCH A MOVIE CALLED "THE MEXICAN" THIS IS A MOVIE WITH BRAD PITT& JULIA ROBERT'S.

For me, when I've been told by a guy that they just want to be friends, that usually means they aren't interested at all and there's no further contact.

They don't call & I don't initiate further contact.

That I'm attracted to, yes. That I really want to be with, that's one of those sh** or get off the pot things for me. Usually, I talk myself out of it after a while, saving myself a good deal of grief. These days, the theme is.. "Oh you have an ex... "



Nothing like that leaves me closed off to other potentials. Usually, what closes me off is the sheer lack of potentials.