You see my problem, the one I sought help with,you wasted your time & effort to respond & you are willing to be shallow but not helpful and then you wish me the best of luck, coming from you & considering how you have treated me, I am sure you must know how special to me your sentiment really is.
Clearly you rose to the height of your abilities & resource for the occasion.
I would really like to return the favor, but none was ever offered,or given we both lost any potential value in the exchange.
I am sure you found the satisfaction you usually do in the attempt to not do something for someone who asked for help.

just curious..have you had equivalent, greater, or lesser success offline as far as dating is concerned..reason i ask is because if you weren't successful offline, what makes you think your going to be successful online..perhaps expectations need to be adjusted..

roco

Hey Roco, that's a fair question.
This is the NON-Reader's Digest version (fair warning to the whineypeople who think they HAVE TO read everything that gets posted and respond like it was THEIR forum)

The deal is that I moved in with my 5th grade sweetheart when I was 19, we stayed together for another 6 years, married for 4, she succumbed to the female urge to reproduce & rather than have kids or deny her of the privilege we decided to set each other free. The week I mentioned it at work a gal came up to me & said she was interested in me until she found out I was married, now that the situation was about to change she wanted to make sure I was aware that she was interested.
We started dating during the 3 month wait for the divorce to become final. "B" moved out on a sunday after the divorce & "M" moved in that monday, for the next 15 years it was the time of my life. We strived daily to become a single spirt instead of 2 people married. We became a "ring & pinion" the sum of the 2 of us was greater than 1+1. We never worried about money only about satisfying the needs of each other in every regard, she gave up a career in front of the camera in order to be with me more. We had no children and we traveled the world for a time, established 4 business together, 1 of them sponsored a national TV program in the 80's & was an advertiser on another on the same network.
We took lessons & got our SailPlane licenses, we worked 7 years 26-42 weekends a year to help a young man reach his goal of becoming a national racing champion, we raised 4 wonderful dogs and bought 2 houses together, moved across the country and we were the envy of all of our friends & associates because of the deep love we expressed for each other and the smoothness of our relationship, people said we acted like newlyweds for 15 years. I have never seen 2 people function like we did, we set our own standard.
What happened? She was killed by a speeder who ran redlights, I surrvived.

So my "dating" experience is between zero and none especially in the past 15 years.
Dating is like the anticipation of going to an amusement park, once you arrive you forget all of the stuff you've been occupied with and concentrate on the long term experience.

And thats why my ineptness is like a tidal wave, I've never had to do the legwork most do in search of a mate, partner, wife & best female friend.....

I know how to drive the car, make it run fantanstic & how to get the most milage out of it, I just have no experience in opening the damn door to the thing!

If you want an opinion I would give you one but I am not going to be insulted for my personal opinions. It is a very long profile and with out it being on this page it is difficult to reference. If you would invite me I will email you from beneath your profile if invited.

P.S. I see that your profile limits input from women over 51 so I can not address you in email. Sad because I think we have a similiar experience with marriage and I better understand some of your feelings than some.

The age was changed and I await your input..!

well from what ive seen u look about 54...i do prefer the shorter hair makes you look younger than the longer hair and longer beard... maybe even younger if you trimed that beard to 1/4 in.. or off... and if you gained some weight would make you look younger too....

First of all, let me say Im sorry for your loss since you did lose a best friend,lover and confidante. I walked out on my mate after years of loving him and trying to make things work with him. In my case I have learned a great deal with regard to sex,intimacy and true love. When you find and have true love with someone its so hard to ever compare that person with another and find that unconditional love and security you once had.
I jumped right into a relationship and fell in love with a guy that is all wrong for me in every way. Now I see what the meaning of true love is.
My story is to long to explain and understand as I myself am confused at this point in life and bewildered. As for your profile, I find it stimulating in an intellectual way. Your hair is fine, since I do like that rock-star look.. I do wish you luck on your journey in life and hope you find what your looking for and lifes true meaning in this self-rightous world we live in.

Sally

Thanks Sally!
Your kindness did not go unappreciated.
There are a lot of people here & out there who have made the same mistake jumped ship & landed in the drink only to find out it takes two dedicated spirits to make any headway against the tides of life. People allow themselves to be distracted from what is real by the inundation of "more, better & richer", the media in all of its forms blasts away at reality with our complicity, we are not satisfied & the purchase of their product will make us feel better.
A simple example, we all need a car, but everyone assumes they need a newer, faster or more reliable one. FALSE! What we need is to learn how to care for that which we have, cars only wear out when we have neglected them & not maintained their tired parts. What we are trying to do by buying NEW all the time is present an image of ourselves that is a mirage, we are never better for driving newer nor do people look up to us because we did, they may envy our income but not the payments or the added costs of insurance.
When we have a partner who is as dedicated as we are to finding depth in a relationship are we not satisfied? If we have compromised the qualities we sought in a another person we wind up with a compromised relationship.
And we compromise mainly out of expediency & comfort & loneliness...& peer pressure. Guys find make-up queens who look marvelous because they want to be envied by all the other guys & women find guys with money who can BUY them crap to continue the charade. We would all say we would rather beauty & money over almast anything else....until after years of self loathing we find ourselves older and poorer & unfulfilled & bitter, because we bought what our peers have told us was the best & denied what we knew in our hearts.
Intimacy gets confused with sex, sharing gets confused with purchasing & togetherness gets lost along the way because it takes effort to maintain a relationship & the world tells us every minute of every waking hour that we can BUY happiness quicker & easier than we can make it ourselves, work hard and buy your way to happiness is the biggest lie foisted on us.
If all things that they told us had the value they sold us on we would not be facing a depression.
This might sound simplistic but the ONLY things of true value are sharing life, love and our futures together, and to do that one MUST find a person smart enough to know the same truth.
In my marriage we were as happy with corn flakes as we were with filet mignon...it is JUST food! It does not make us better or enrich our lives to spend more in pursuit of what others tell us is their standard of excellence, we have to find our own. This site is a dump of unmet expectations, broken hearts and abused trusts and all for one reason, we gave into the lies others sold us or that we sold ourselves.
And the tragic thing is that if given the chance at a "golden relationship" most of us would return asap to the ways we failed in the past, because it is easy!
True love is never easy in the present but if you give it you everything & your partner does the same, when you look back it WAS easy, all you had to do was give w/o expectations, be honest and realize that this relationship is all you really have of value. What is more valuable than a partner who is honest, loving & willing to do anything to continue to be so? Money and crap all lose their value over time, on your deathbed do you want riches, crap and the envy of people who mean nothing to you or do you want the comfort of an equal who has returned with interest all that you have given?
We have learned to seek stimulation over satisfaction, money over time and crap over fulfillment of the heart and in doing so we have lost our way in life....and we find ourselves here searching with broken hearts for what we have forgotten was important LOVE & companionship until death.
"We " are all that are important in life, "we" working together to better "US". My wife & I believed we could build our relationship 1% a day....and at the end of the year we were 365% better off for it, by staying focused on the relationship,
just 1% a day...how damned tuff is that to accomplish?
Yet few actually ever do that much...why? distraction, selfishness & desires are the enemy!
We give all of our time to employers & none to each other in comparison!
We are more interested in presenting an enviable image than we are in being better, we have bought the lies of advertising & media consultants wholesale and where are they now that the truth is overwhelming?....selling more lies to those younger and dumber than we were who buy them at a greater rate than we did.

Sally what we all need is to stop fooling ourselves and those around us into believing we are what we project and just become our true selves...people who need love and a companion who seeks the same at ANY COST.
No one has EVER been able to steal a truly full heart because one that is full cannot be swayed into "better" or richer or prettier because a truly full heart is worth 1000 times more than all of those other things combined.

Give this a thought, do the blind care an iota about beauty or image or envy? Why is their satisfaction in life so much greater as a whole than those of us with sight?
Because they "see" from the heart and are not distracted thru envy or peer pressure, we could all learn a lesson from them, instead we ignore them and pity their existence, poor us eh?