Topic: " A Letter To God from the Dog"
Redsoxfan1's photo
Thu 01/15/09 09:40 AM



Dear God: Is it on purpose our names are the same, only reversed?
Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?


Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story??


Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a Dog? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the 'Chrysler Eagle' the 'Chrysler Beagle'?


Dear God: If a Dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad Dog?

Dear God: We Dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beepers, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?

Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good Dog.

1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.

2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.

3. The Litter Box is not a cookie jar.

4. The sofa is not a 'face towel'.

5. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.

6. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.

7. Sticking my nose into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying 'hello'.

8. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table .

9. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.

10. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.

11. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch.

12. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.


P.S. Dear God: When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back?
rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl rofl

no photo
Thu 01/15/09 10:02 AM
Haha I like it!

Redsoxfan1's photo
Thu 01/15/09 11:18 AM

Haha I like it!
I'm glad you did!:heart:

Redsoxfan1's photo
Thu 01/15/09 02:56 PM
:tongue:

keepthehope's photo
Fri 01/16/09 01:48 AM
laugh

polaritybear's photo
Fri 01/16/09 02:01 AM
Number three and number eight made me giggle.

no photo
Sat 01/17/09 07:14 PM
Dog's are my friend.

Sharon31216's photo
Sun 01/18/09 09:01 AM
I love dogs, and this is hilarious!! I love it.

Redsoxfan1's photo
Sun 01/18/09 09:53 AM

I love dogs, and this is hilarious!! I love it.
I'm glad I could give you a laugh!!:heart:

rombump2's photo
Sun 01/18/09 03:00 PM
thats a good onelaugh