An Arab, Frenchman, American and a Mexican are riding down the highway.
The Arab picks up an AK-47. He shoots a couple of rounds and then throws the gun out the window. The American asks him why he through the gun out the window and the Arab says they have so many of those where he is from he doesn't care about what happens to them.
The Frenchman picks up a bottle of wine and drinks a little and throws it out the window. The American asks him why he tossed it. The Frenchman says they have so much of it where he is from he doesn't care what happens to it.
The American picks up the Mexican and throws him out the window


A woman went to doctors office. She was seen by one of the new doctors, but after about 4 minutes in the examination room, she burst out, screaming as she ran down the hall. An older doctor stopped and asked her what the problem was, and she explained. He had her sit down and relax in another room.
The older doctor marched back to the first and demanded, "What's the matter with you? Mrs.Terry is 63 years old, she has four grown children and seven grandchildren, and you told her she was pregnant?"
The new doctor continued to write on his clipboard and said, "Does she still have the hiccups?"

I was traveling down the interstate when I had to make a pit stop at a rest stop. The first toilet stall was occupied, so I went into the second one.
I was no sooner seated than I heard a voice from the next stall say, "Hi, how are you doing?"
Well, I am not the type to chat with strangers and especially under those conditions ... and I really don't know quite what possessed me, but I answered, "Not bad."
And the stranger said, "And, what are you up to?"
Talk about your dumb questions! I was really beginning to think this was too weird! So I said, "Well, just like you I am driving South"
Then, I heard the stranger get all upset and say, "Look, I'll call you right back, there is some idiot in the next stall answering all the questions I am asking you. Bye!"

An old wild west fort is about to be attacked. The wily old General sends for his trusty Indian Scout.
"Yumti-Bi," he said, "you must use all your thirty years of skill in trying to estimate the sort of army we are up against here."
Yumti-Bi laid down and put his ear to the ground... "Heap large -- war party," he says, "maybe three hundred braves, four chiefs, two on black stallions, two on white stallions. All have war paint...many many guns. Medicine man also with them."
"Good grief!" exclaims the General, "you can tell all of that just by listening to the ground???"
"No, General," replied the Indian, "I can see under the gate..."



A couple of hunters are out in the woods in the deep south when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, and his eyes are rolled back in his head.
The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps to the operator, "My friend is dead! What can I do?"
The operator, in a calm and soothing voice, says, "All right, take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."
There is silence, and then a gun shot is heard.
The hunter comes back on the line. "OK. Now what??"


A passenger in a taxi tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him something.
The driver screamed, lost control of the cab, nearly hit a bus, drove up over the curb and stopped just inches from a large plate glass window.
For a few moments everything was silent in the cab, then the driver said, "Please, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me."
The passenger, who was also frightened, apologized and said he didn't realize that a tap on the shoulder could frighten him so much.
To which the driver replied, "I'm sorry, it's really not your fault at all. Today is my first day driving a cab, I have been driving a hearse for the last 25 years.

lmao

Nice, I laughed pretty hard at all those