Ahhh sorry love I misunderstood...

Deadline is that why you chose your name? Why does it matter if you're alone for a year? If it means meeting a quality person? It doesn't mean no dating and hanging out... But to put it on a deadline says "uh oh" to me...

no no... deadline is user name i picked on other sites for ages now.. maybe coz I like to work all the way till the deadline putting as much effort into something as time allows it.

and as far the other thing.. well, I just don't like to be alone. I am a relationship person.

Ahhh ok, at first I thought that then wondered the other..

Hmmmmm maybe I'm just different... You have to do what works for you...

Ok. Here is another symptom of this limbo state I described earlier:

I have been with one woman for 8 years and had no plans on being with anyone else. I am sure its funny to some people, but I was just happy with what I had... so all other women around me were just friends. now that I am back on the open market again, I am having hard time getting out of the friend zone into having sex with another person zone...

Perhaps you need to get used to being on your own and being happy while being single before jumping into another relationship.

It will last as long as it needs to. In the mean time, you could find fun things to do, hobbies, or even set some goals. Going out to dinner alone is just fine, going bowling alone etc. You just have to put one foot in front of the other and you will get your single legs back.

I don't think there's a time setting

I think you'll be ready when you feel you're ready

A knee jerk reaction is to rush into another relationship just to feel better. Personal experience is it doesn't work and hurts the other person. Live each day and the good days will start to outnumber the bad days. Feel everything, file it away and move on. After being married for 12 years and seperated for 7 months, I have no idea how long this will last but good luck and hang here. Good friends, great advice (normally) and lots of laughs.

oh. I have things to do.that is not a problem... I started going to the gym almost every day. got into photography more then before.. plus work is keeping me busy. But I won't do things alone. that would be depressing...(for me)

Emotions are contained within your own body. Nobody can feel what you feel so is it even worth feeling in limbo at all??

The flirty side of me says: Lets see if I can help ease your pain, cutie

The serious side says: Its going to take as long as it takes. Everyday will get easier, but some days will still seem like it was yesterday for a little while. You'll get there when you get there and don't rush yourself.

good advice

strange zone is a good term, the zone grows stranger every passing year.

bring the flirty side back!

I wouldn't do things alone for a while. Now, if I want to see a movie and friends are busy I just go. It's not that bad. And it's way better than hanging out all alone at home waiting for life to happen.

The fog takes a while to lift. And, not having sex won't kill you.

Really......... lol

Sherry

It never leaves

You know... its not about sex. Its about being in relationship for me. But then ONE cannot be without the OTHER, so it works out quite well..

It's really hard. Even for short relationships sometimes too.
It depends on how much you put yourself into the relationship.
I have only recently started to finally heal and move out of the rut that I was in after my last break up. Which was about 4 nearly 5 months ago. But I'm one to fall in love easily and put my all into a relationship; I dive in without looking to the future.
It hurts and feels really empty at first. I felt like I was stuck in that one spot in life. It felt as if we had only broken up yesterday for like almost 4 months.
We are made to heal and move on. We just have to find the strength to do so.
I have found God to be a big help to me.
If you're not religious that's okay too. You can always turn to someone else to simply give you a shoulder to rest your head on when things just seem rough. Find someone to talk to.
I love my therapist. She is really helpful and gives you a third person point of view of the situation.

It is hard and sometimes long but you will find your strength in time.
The best of luck and may God bless you.

<3 Jo

Um, you can be in a relationship without sex. You might not want one, but it can be done.

I am a relationship person too. And I have been alone for two years after a 15-year relationship. I do not like being alone at all.