Godzilla- knocks down building
Al Gore- "See, this is a part of global warming- releasing ancient
frozen dinosaurs"
Godzilla- Blasts Gore with radiactive energy breath
Gore- "Don't you realize the environmental consequences of your
actions"
Godzilla- "what the hell?" Blasts Gore again
Gore- "This only proves your complete disregard for the wellbeing of
your grandchildren"
Godzilla- "this isn't working" Stomps Gore
Gore- "You should read my book"
Godzilla- Stomps again
Gore- "Tell you what, I'll even give you a free, autographed copy"
Godzilla- "WHY AREN'T YOU DEAD!?!?!"- Wades into the ocean
Gore- "glug glug- this water is overfished and the ecosystem is dying"

Railroad Redneck

Three railroad workers, a Chinese man, an Italian, and a redneck, are
all sitting down to lunch.
The Chinese man says, "If I get another egg roll in my lunch, I'll kill
myself."

The Italian guy says, "If I get another slice of pizza, I'll kill
myself."

The redneck says, "Iffin I get another ham hock, I'll kill myself."

The next day, all three men get the same lunches, so they throw
themselves in front of an oncoming train. At the funeral the Chinese
man's wife says, "If only I hadn't packed an egg roll that day."

The Italian guy's wife says, "If only I hadn't packed a slice of pizza
that day."

"Don't look at me," says the redneck's wife. "He done packed his own
vittles."

Dude. Aren't you supposed to get your own thread. This was my joke.
Post your own elsewhere.

sorry bout that...not really sure why it matters....all good for a laugh

Because everyone else has their own threads for their joke of choice-
except the ones who solicited a continuing thread, of course. That way
people can comment on said sence of humor without the interference of
other peoples' works gumming the works.