Alright I am separated from my husband and I told him I just want to be friends cuzz we have 3 babies together but we still call each other when I say "love you" i mean it as "I care" and I know deep down that he does not love me he's just comfortable with me. Truth be told my babies are in dhs and I feel that this marriage is NOT healthy for me (some of you ladies know what i mean)so if you have any advice i would sure appreciate it. I feel alone in this decision, and I know someone out there knows that the saying "its for the kids best interest" is always said but it is better for them to see "LOVE" between both parents then anger, or am I just being a hardass....

For this...I cannot give you advice, Because I can't see his reactions...I can't judge a relationship unless I watch it. Conflict is Natural...on a daily basis...yes. But to continously be angry at each other? No...Then it is time to sit and reevaluate feelings and judge WHY such anger occurs.

Sounds to me like you need to kick this loser to the curb

well in my case i didnt stay in the marriage. it was rocky from the beganing and the reason we got married or that i felt we did was because of our son. he was 2months old when we got married and i wanted to wait. you just dont keep a relationship going because of the kids. it just doesnt work like that. its true you should show love but if both parents arent happy the kids already know it

I agree with the above poster but I'd also add that you might best be served finding more qualified advice than you'd get in an internet forum. Good luck. I hope you find the right answers for you.

I just re read the post. My misunderstanding. "For the Kids" is a BAD exscuse for marriage. You need to re evaluate your feelings... then...ACT on what your heart tells you. Being with a guy in constant conflict leads to a life a misery and dread. That being said... It's not worth it.

you might be surprised some of us guys know what you mean too..i went through what you are going through and i am raising my son by myself after i split with my gf five years ago...i feel its best for all that we split up ..she was just using me to help take care of her other three kids from a previous marriage..
i found it a little difficult at first and i have never received any money for our son in five years but i manage and i feel its better for me and my son ...we're alot happier now and i wouldnt get back with her no matter what ..but i cant be friends with his mother because she has never done anything for her son since we've been separated ..which only goes to show me exactly what type of person she was...

Staying together for the children's sake... Usually not a good idea. The children know or will grow up knowing that it is not a loving family atmosphere. Then they will possibly have doubts about their own abilities as adults to have healthy relationships. They usually end up suffering more in the long run. And will question "why" did they stay togeher? Everyone was miserable... Why???

We are professionals here-you didn't get your psychology degree on line when they offered it last week? LOL!

Kids adapt faster and better than any adult to their environment. They will be fine regardless of your choice. You on the other hand have to decide if you are though with the relationship or not. Only you can make that choice.

Seek out help. Be that professional therapy or whatever. They can sometimes solve the problems, and other times make a break up less painful.

The one exception is if the spouse is putting the family at risk, in which case you need to remove the kids from such a dangerous situation ASAP.