Topic: Wal-mart diagnostic computor
catchme_ifucan's photo
Fri 04/13/07 08:39 PM


One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him,
'My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I'd better see a doctor.'

'Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money,' Mike replies.

'There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine
sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about
it.

It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars . . . A lot cheaper than a
doctor.'

So, Joe deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart.

He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the
urine sample. He p! ours the sample into the slot and waits.

Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout:

'You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy
activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @
Wal-Mart.'

That evening, while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joe
began wondering if the computer could be fooled.

He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from
his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure.

Joe hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits
ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.

The computer prints the following:

1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get
better!

Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart


Tameka's photo
Fri 04/13/07 08:55 PM
that is sooooo gross... i really hope that we never have that
technology... and if we do, i would not want to be in charge of the up
keep on it.... eeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww....lol

sexybear's photo
Sat 04/14/07 02:16 AM
lol, I agree 100%, and as a computer programmer, and video game design
student, I must tell you, that sort of thing is almost 100% possible...