Okay folks, I know this has been posted before, but I can’t remember what all has been said and I am too lazy to find the old threads, so here goes:


A dear friend of mine is in a relationship and the man’s ex won’t leave them alone. She calls, texts, emails him and every time she does, the man is at her beckon call. I live close enough to where I can go over to my friend’s house for an ear or a shoulder, but I am at a loss as to what to tell her she should do. I have told her an ex is an ex for a reason, but all that does is make her cry as the man doesn’t see it the same way as her and I do.

So let me hear from you guys what she should do and how she should handle this situation. Thanks I know I can count on you all for some good advice.

Why is she still having contact with him? Is she able to cut all ties with him?

Yes she is able, but isn't willing to cut the ties and he won't force the issue

I'd say instead of sitting home and crying, worrying and feeling insecure, accompany him. Go with him to the ex's emergencies

I think she should put her foot down and say listen I love you but if you continue to ignore me at every call you get from that b*tch of an ex, then I am sorry but this isn't going to work out.

she should be golden after that

hmmmm, don't know if this has been suggested, but I will ask her what she thinks about this, hell I like this idea myself

see it as a win - win

ex gets her emergency visit
and current g/f stands by her man

tears do us no good except get our eyes puffy, tell her put on some makeup, wear those nice shoes she hasn't had a reason to wear, go visit the ex - and then make a night out of it with b/f

keeping him on a timer

but I didnt say this

She has asked him to stop jumping everytime the ex calls, don't know that is helps, but maybe putting her foot down and being a bit more stern might help, she is somewhat reserved and soft spoken, but it might work if I get in her craw and help her be a little more vocal

Thanks {{fran}} you are an cough bull****

Oops, I totally misunderstood the whole thing. I was thinking she had an ex and wouldn't cut off ties with him. Sorry. Now I get it. And I agree with this suggestion!

sadly she accepted the behavior, he has no reason to quit now - who knows what type of emergencies the 'ex' has

and if he hasn't seen it fit to stop (duh!) it may not be to her benefit to try and rein him in now. People normally don't like limitations and rules and rebel.

jmo

right on

Some exes are out to ruin anything. This happened to my son's father and I. His ex wouldnt leave us alone. After 5 years.....it was too much for me. With that and alot of other things, I left.

A couple cannot have a proper relationship if there is a 3rd party involved!!!

And who else to bring my friend out of her shell

Thanks Gypsy, you are so right

Are there young children (under 18) involved here?
If not, then b/f needs to tell "ex" to butt out! And if he won't, then g/f needs to rethink the relationship...who's more important to him, the ex or g/f? There's no need to be rude to an "ex" when meeting accidently like a grocery store, etc, but to have them involved STILL in your life when there's no young children at home? Something is wrong when they're THAT involved. JMO.

No children involved, and you are right, but my friend loves this man and she is so upset

Oh poop, I didn't finish


She isn't the type to be nasty to anyone, but she is just at wit's end as what to do about the ex. I am concerned for her and her happiness

sounds like a booty call, friend with benefit thing yeah I said it

tell her to bring her down here for some bayou water skiing, known hereabouts as "Trollin for gator"

BG knows how hard a time I had getting rid of one of my ex's, she helped me dig the hole she's buried right in my backyard

but where? and which "yard" ? we went eight feet instead of six, stacked rocks on her then threw the dirt in , cause of the low sea level and swamp thing. I know, that's cruel you say, but you had to be there, words just can't describe the madness. Since then, I've quit drinking, unless I want to get drunk, I've quit smoking, unless I want a smoke. I don't Honky Tonk no more, less I wanna go out Honky Tonking.