CAN I ATLEAST GET SOME PIEEEEE PLEASREEEEE

west,

which ones, LMAO!

Mmmm, dinneerrrr....heh.

daughter's been sick..so, when I picked her up tonight, we stopped in
the local. She got Tomato pasta soup (omg, I shoulda picked that, lol)
And, I got thier shepards pie (comfort food, lol)

mmmmm

*making hand wafty gestures*

Sure thing ... let's go to Z'S bar i saw Klugman over there ... he
might has a pie. You never know :^)

I'm sturving too lol

what kind of pie do you like Prussia?

Now here's something that I pretty much agree with 100 percent!

BUT...

("Oh, hell, here she goes," you're probably thinking)...hehe

If I'm doing something that my partner perceives to be detrimental to my
own physical/mental health and well-being, or particularly, to our
relationship, I hope he would, out of love, gently and kindly try to
"change me." I'd certainly do the same thing for him. Complacency can be
a very dangerous thing.

But I do very much agree that the foundation for a good relationship
boils down, basically, to one thing: RESPECT.

you want one to try and change you?
am I understanding that?

Great POST and Advice


And I have come to believe that with these sites and talking,meeting,
and looking,,,,,

WE ALL tend to be LOOKING for THAT ONE SPECIAL ONE,,,,,
and I really think we all just need to meet and talk and see,,,what and
how alot of us feel about life and want in life,,,,,,BEFIRE ,,believing
that WE FOUND MISS, OR MR, RIGHT!!!
Just my thoughts,,,now...

"you want one to try and change you?
am I understanding that?"

Didn't I explain that succinctly enough in my post? I said if I'm doing
something that he perceives is detrimental to my health or well-being I
would hope that he cares about me enough to want me to change that
behavior...such as, if I was smoking or drinking, that sort of stuff. If
I was (and I no longer am), I'd probably resent it but, deep down, I'd
know he was doing it because he cared about me.

I think I understand now. Thanks.

For me, of course I'd want someone to care enough. But, I also want to
be who I am. All of me. I won't depend on someone else to tell me wether
what I do is considered, to them, harmful to me.
Now, if I were not in a frame of mind to decide, then I might
reconsider. But, again, this is putting my self into another persons
hands to decide such.
Ihave come way too far to let that happen.
I smoke, and don't see myself quitting anytime soon. Last thing I want
is someone trying to "fix" me, lol.

I'm sure that's not what you meant, though.

Jane, i found this to be an incredible read,, Thank you for posting

Thank you LAmom! I loved it when I read it!

I could never be with someone consumed in negativity, period. Trying to
change someone else never work's. I think there are a million books on
that exact issue, lol. We can only change who we are, ourselves, for
ourselves. What we give, we get back. I like to believe that.
Compromise is not a dirty word. Being emotionally connected is the heart
of a true love.

((((((((((( Jane )))))))))))))))))

Spoken so true,,,,

I have enjoyed reading your posts, and hope to see more,,

Hugggs back to you girl, thanks!

Nice post doubleOsweetone.

Love should be unconditional. Trying to change someone to something you
dream is not unconditional.

If you balance negative and positive you stay in one place.

if you accept what you perceive as negative and cherish the positive you
move forward.

I agree Ab...Nice post!!!!!!

Yes, ET, I did mean exactly that. Like I said, I'd probably resent the
hell out of it, but I'd also appreciate someone who cared enough about
me to want me to quit.

However, how they went about it would make all the difference in the
world. I sure wouldn't want someone breathing down my neck 24/7 about
it.

My daughter smokes and I'll take an opportunity every so often to simply
say, "You need to quit smoking."

Period. End of story. She doesn't respond..simply silently acknowledges,
because she knows I'm right.

She hasn't quit yet, but I hope one day she will.

And as a former 30-year smoker, one might say "Who are you to judge?"

Well, "I'm a former 30-year smoker and, being such, I'm in a perfect
position to judge!"

She witnessed my aunt die from an aortic aneurysm..she choked to death
on her own blood...all as the result of smoking-related disesaes, so I'm
surprised she ever started smoking to begin with.

But anyway...I don't want to see my daughter die of COPD or emphysema
(or for any other reason)...nor would I want to see my spouse get sick
and die. So, yes, I'll tell them, HEY...I CARE ABOUT YOU! I LOVE YOU! I
DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE...SO STOP SMOKING, DAMNIT!"

I think, though, rather than wanting someone to "change me," (being the
fiercely independent person I am), I'd rather have someone who cared
enough to make me want to change myself, if they saw I was doing
something detrimental to my health and well-being.