I have this co-worker that has become a pretty close friend. She is older then me and has kids that are almost my age. He husband just recently left her, promising that he will pay the mortgage,cable and some of the utilities. Which he started to do, but has stopped. The recently just lost there cable. And who knows what else he is not paying. My friend is trying to make ends meet. She is working two jobs, and still can notr do it. Her 18 year old daughter still lives at home, she is not going to school and is also working two jobs. But refuses to give mommy anything. Her son just moved back in because he lost his apartment, as he lost his job. But he looking. I know he will step up and help. But still I am afraid that my friend might lose her place. I care a great deal for her as a friend, I am just out of advice to give to her. She is still going through the courts.

Anybody have any advice that they can give me to pas onto her?

That would all depend what kind of system that Canada offers as far as welfare ect... Contact the DA's office if she has small children for child support. If not most churches will help out in time of need. Not sure of what all type of programs that Canada has.

her kids need to get jobs and help out,..,.mine helps out, she works goes to school and is ONLY 16!!!

I'm confused, the 18 year old moved back in with mom, but won't help pay bills? Ummm, that's not right.

she can start by telling her daughter to start helping out or get out. i know its sounds mean but shes 18 and needs to start pulling her own weight. she loses her house then what is her daughter going to do

So who is paying his bills? My ex has a lot more money than I do...she's not stepping up. She was going to junk her old car, but offered it to our daughter for $500...geesh! Women too.

I have told her that she needs to start downsizing, by selling the house. And she has told her daughter to that she needs to start helping. But her daughter refuses and is controlling and her mother accepts it. Even when her mom just called me a few minutes ago, I heard her yell in the back ground to get off the phone and stop talking to people which her mother did. I just feel so bad. That is no way to live.

Humm with what you just said then reality will have to hit home before she sees that changes are needed. For one both kids need to find their own way in life she needs to sale the house if she can't afford it which if she is still married can't do it without the husband signing for it. Then she needs to move into a one bedroom apartment so the kids can't move back in.

That is what I am starting to think to. It is sad, cause she is a GREAT person. She really is. She will go out of her way for anybody.

honestly, then its her own fault for letting her daughter treat her like that. she`ll never get ok of this mess till she learns to take control of her own house

Hey, has she contacted an attorney.
Hubbies name is on house, his credit goes same as hers.
Minor children = child support.
Get the legal system rolling.
Find out EXACTLY what her rights are.
Who's name is all this REALLY in??
Legal way is always the best place to start.
Adult kids, no help for mom, change the locks & put their stuff on the porch.

Going gets tough, the tough get going.

Well myself, if I was her I would tell the husband ya better fork over the mortgage on the house and lets put it up for sale and we will split the profit after it is sold. If not I would not pay it either save up ever dime I could till they foreclosed on it and would not move out till they made me by then she would have enough to move and get a small apartment. In the mean time go through and sale what ever was in the house that I did not plan on taken with me and not say anything to anyone till the time came and leave the kids to fend for themselves at that time or they could go shack up with Daddy instead.

Thank you. I think I will suggest that to her. I honestly think she needs to kick out the daughter and get an apartment. It would do her a world of good.e

If she doesn't have any kids under 18 then she is out of luck. And her husband doesn't by law have to do anything. But if she does have kids under 18 then go to the DA and file for back child support. If the child that is 18 and not willing to help out....then should move out. I paid rent when I first started working and going to school full time. It doesn't seem fair I am their kid but it was the best thing they could of done. If the kids are taking advantage of mom then mom has to grow a backbone and lay down the law.