I know right?

My ex told me a few weeks ago he was dating someone, which I have no issue with, as I trust him to make wise decisions when it comes to the involvement of our daughter.

She came home tonight and cried when I was putting her to sleep that daddy spends all of his time talking to "Miss Becky" and not to her.

Do I tell him, and start an arguement...Trust me it will. Or do I wait for him to screw it up with her and talk to him about it then?

I would say something to him regardless if an argument will develop.. A child should never feel like second place EVER!


I feel for your daughter my dad did that sh*t to me too

If it is affecting your daughter I would talk to him about it, she seems like she is obviously distraught by it...it is worth mentioning to him.

I agree with Alicat - say something now - he needs to know it's hurting his daughter.

You need to allow them to figure things out for themselves. You can not control what an ex does on their time with a child. Trust me, as children get older..they will figure everything out for themselves and chances are..as they get older, they will no longer want to visit the other parent as much.

If it is bothering your daughter to that extent..she herself needs to talk to her father about it and how it makes her feel.

My little one's Dad is overly involved with his new lady and it kills our daughter. She feels so left out. I've tried to talk with him, have her included to express her feelings. He says he hears what we are saying, but nothing changes and our daughter is really growing to resent him. She likes his new mate; doesn't like her own Dad. I can only do so much!! This is something I can't fix. He's not thinking and acting in her best interest!!!

I'm not justifying his actions by any means but maybe he just doesn't realize what he's doing. We all know what it's like to be in a new relationship and spending a lot of time with them but expecting a child to understand that is not right. I would just simply tell him what she said and let him make himself feel like sh!t.

She's only 6 and a half...

what she said

Yeah I am definitely having that conversation with him. Anything that affects your daughter and her emotional state would be of the utmost importance too me. Sigh~ men....another round??

i say BYTCH slap him..o.k not really .i just havent said that in awhile..bytch slap him...



parents can sometimes be so insensitive ..i know im a sinle parent of a teenager ...somebody shoot me...

Old enough to express her feelings.. she obviously did with you. If you said something, he will then know that she told you about the new GF.. he will then think of it as jealousy or something to that effect.

If I were in your shoes I would tell my child that sometimes when people (in general) get a new friend they tend to give them a lot of attention. I'm sure he doesn't know he is doing this and you should tell him how it makes you feel.

If you get involved it could cause a rift between the two of you. It is HIS relationship with your daughter. Though we always want to make things right for our children, it is their relationship. If she can tell YOU what is bothering her, she surely can tell him.

By allowing them to work through the issues it will build a stronger relationship for them and you will not be perceived as interfering.

I hear what you are saying...She's a very sensitive little girl. Wants to make everyone happy. I'm so tired of wiping the tears that he causes.... I wanna punch him in the face.

I called him "fun time dad" the other day when she was sick and took her swimming because they had a day planned (with the gf) and he didn't want to ruin it. Then brought her back to me with an ear infection which I had to tend to.

Coming from a divorced father who has custody of his daughter....put him in his place...it's wrong what he's doing and your daughter will only suffer more the longer it goes on.

I understand what you are saying. Let's face it,,, a lot of times, married or divorced.. the father is the "fun" one.

My children are from 2 different marriages and believe me,,, I have had to swallow a LOT of $hit to insure they have a good relationship with their fathers. In the end it was all worth it.

As someone said earlier in the thread, children will see how things really are.. but remember, we chose them to have a child with. It is up to us to put the child first.

From experience feelings are not always that easy to express at such a young age.

If the child can express these feelings to the mother, why do you feel she cannot express them to the father?

He has her most weekends and once during the week for 3 hours, how hard is it to keep those 3 hours a week clear just for her?

It makes me think I did him a disservice all those years we were married by dong everything for him and he never had to think for himself.

There are a number of variables that can differ from person to person, the reason I never said anything was due to intimidation. I'm not saying her daughter is intimidated, but when you've known one thing your whole life and a new aspect is added into the equation it is difficult to cope with...all I'm saying is I wish someone would have spoke for me when I had the same concern...