stare at my five new pairs of socks and I am filled with a sort of giddy excitement that most people just wouldn’t get. I lay them out with an awe filled reverence and examine each pair with academic precision. I have two pairs that are a dusty blue shade. I have a pair that is dark blue with white and powder blue polka dots and a pair of dark and powder blue strips. The last pair is completely dark blue with powder blue toes heel and a strip on the ankle.
And they are all mine.
I want to wear all five pairs at once but I know I have to limit myself to only one, and so I stare, picking each pair up and smoothing it with my hands, studying each side until I feel like I have memorized each stitch. I feel the texture and I find myself deeply in love with them all.
Finally I decide on the very last pair, the ones with the powder blue heels, and I hesitate. These are my socks. Brand new and beautiful.
After a few minutes I gather my courage and slip them on, my feet now covered in softness. I sigh.
Who would think that socks could be considered a luxury item? But its been months since I have had a new pair and these were a gift from my aunt. Funny but she probably didn’t even think twice about buying them. They were just something that was an every day type thing and she probably doesn’t know that if she were in the same room with me right now I would smother her in hugs for them.
To me these symbolize a new stage in my life. A stage where I don’t feel guilty for needing something or for asking for them. A stage where I realize that its ok to need and want and that I now have people who love me. I have finally come to accept that I can live my life actually living instead of just surviving.
I am finally letting go of my grief. I am finally learning the difference between forgiving and letting myself be torn apart by a sense of obligation. I am learning to be strong and to protect myself. And I have finally begun to accept the idea that maybe, just maybe life holds more than fear and pain.
Yes, these are only socks to some people, but to me they hold a much greater meaning, and tonight I shall snuggle up with my puppy and watch a movie with my feet nested in my new pair of socks.

Cute!!

(Actually I used to be a major sock collector; the crazier, the better)

comfort socks