wow, i've finally graduated!! i'm now a lady, when before, i was just a saddletramp!! tee hee!!!

i see that you mentioned money yesterday and today, if he was poor would you still be bumpin ugliest with him? hmmmmmm

I don't think you will be alone BESIDES I think its better to be alone then to settle!! There are so many single people out there, I am sure after you have time to heal that you will find that right one for you!!

**darkowl~~just think, being called a lady is a big step up

Oh sorry, i thought your advice hit the nail on the head...very insightful, ty

This post is particularly irritating to me...

It seems what you are saying is that, in the words of a friend of mine, the man is a BTN (Better than nothing). You are not attracted to him yet you are using him as a filler until you find someone more appealing.

I can only speak for myself, but I'm sure many of my gender would agree, when I say that the self-centered, all about me, do not give a crap about the person I am dating attitude makes me WANT TO STAY THE F*CK HOME and give up this whole daunting process.

Oh I know I have thought of it this way....but remember, we look at someone as a whole...there is something to be said for what being financially secure does...we can't overlook that...

No that is not it at all, I would NEVER use someone..but I found him attractive to date quite awhile, we had so much fun, but then I let it go because I was not feeling the love thing, you have it quite wrong, and you shouldn't be so hateful...

Plus I did not use him!! All he did was buy me dinners, I did not take thousands from him, good grief, get it straight, mr. uptight...sorry you have been used..

AND, if you read any of my posts right, you would have seen that I was very attracted to him...just some things weren't right...there were gray areas....but I am sure everything is black and white to you....right???

Of course not, but I refuse to use people in this process. If she is not for me then I do not date her, period!

The fact is, you have stated that things were not right. If things are not right then why the ambivalence? I'll tell you why, although it is something you need to be telling yourself, he is a reasonable facsimile of what you are truly looking for minus a few key components... So....., you deem him worthy to spend time with until that elusive Mr. Perfect for you comes along.


All I can suggest is that you try a little introspection and decide whether or not, if the shoe was on the other foot, you would like to be the BTN person...

i agree completely.

i can't even imagine how cruel it is, or how embarassed i'd be, if a guy i were sleeping with had to close his eyes and pretend i looked like something other than me, in order to get aroused enough to perform, or had to 'talk himself into making love' with me.

how utterly humiliating.

and i do take it as a compliment, for my thinking is hopefully more on that line overall. thank you, humbly

no worries, i was being silly, and you're welcome, but these women have already said everything i would have said in realtime, sitting there talking to you over a cup of coffee about this subject....there really is a lot of great life experiences to learn from on here. it's like a living library, so to speak.

looks fade........we are all ugly at 90!!!

Seriously......you dont love the guy......if you did his looks wouldnt matter. What you are seeing is his financial and what looks good on paper........

Ahh yes, but selfishness never fades

but then NOBODY would want to be with me.

While I'm listening to "That Face" from The Producers. lol. It just randomly popped in.

If you cannot tell if you are in love with him, then you are not. Its that simple. You shouldn't have to think about if you are in love.

Only you can answer that.