Not too worry and don't be sorry. We all make decisions, sometimes good ones and sometimes poor ones. I always like to say that we do the best with what we know at any given point in time. If you made anyone angry, too bad. What many people would like to see is everyone else behaving as they self-righteously do. What they forget are their own poor decisions.

Just shakes my head in disgust

Yes, BUT IF a man inpregnates 4 or 5 women and never sees the kids or gives them up for adoption..this is okay..right? Like the men that helped create these lives with me..their totally off the hook. No child support to pay and no one to remind them of their decisions for the rest of their lives. Hmmmm

No it isnt right, but 2 wrongs dont make a right, and it sounds like u have given up ur children for the wrong reasons, it just means instead of havin 1 parent, they have none.

You know while everyone is bashing on her for not being married etc. I am 25 a single mom raising a 6 1/2 month old by myself. I WAS MARRIED when I got pregnant in fact she was planned. Then when the responsiblity part came he ran. Now we are getting divorced. I have little advice but there are places that have people to talk to or you can go to a church someone will help you make the best discision for you and the baby. Also most doctors after your 3rd baby let you get your tubes tied. If yours doesnt find a new doctor.

All I can say is that I definitely got the impression that the OP was well aware of her errors and is trying as best she can do move forward in a positive manner.

Shame on all of you that just slammed her. That is so not what this thread was about. She admitted her mistakes. I read that quite clearly.

Why not emphasize the positive, provide encouragement? None of us are perfect, we have all erred. We don't need that dug into the ground... we need encouragement to do better, to rise above and be stronger for the next situation. This does not excuse mistakes, but does harping on them, judging this girl.... does that seem constructive? Who has the right to do that?

Where is the humanity in here? I see only a small percentage of posters showing it. As to the others... I am really sad to read what you wrote. I also hope that isn't you one day, with whatever mistakes you make.

The only compassion I have is for born and unborn children...they deserve better. They did not ask to be born...by someone who is not ready or does not want them.

You see people make choices, yes getting pregnant can be a accident. But lets see if the doc does not prescribe birth control...which I doubt very seriously, then there are condoms or even the pull out method.

Get real people...dont treat your partners and especially your children as disposable. Nor should we take the easy way out and get on wellfare (some people really need it). I find this thread appauling and would think that any struggling parent, especially single moms would take offense to it.

Signed: A Loving DAD

I was a single mom at 20. 2 kids by 21. I took responsibility for my actions and raised my children. I wouldn't have changed it for anything in this world. No It is not easy being a single mom or dad, but take responsibility for your actions.

In this day and age there is no excuse for unwanted pregnancy. There are so many birth control options out there. If your current doctor will not prescribe one, go to another doctor or better yet Planned Parenthood. Every drug store, grocery store hell Walmart sells condoms. Use your head and protect yourself girl.

Upland... how very sad. I hope the next time you need compassion you get kicked in the face too, or buried yet further in your self-esteem.

I am a single parent myself. I personally like to provide support to other single parents when they strive to be better.

Can you objectively see what you are doing in your posts? How you are portraying yourself?

If she goes to planned parenthood or a women's crisis center she will get the medical attention she needs plus the counseling she also needs

Well, thank you all for your support. The dad is gone. I talked to him on the phone. He said since I messed things up with him...he wants nothing to do with this baby. He said he only got me pregnant to keep me around. I asked him why he just gets to walk away. I don't...wow.

Hi,
as a fellow adoptee I bless my birthmom everyday that she made the decision she did to put me up for adoption.It was the right thing for me.I can tell that you are in no emotional or finacial shape to care for the little one.I think you should get counseling,your older kids should know who you are and why they live with your sister and you should find a doctor who understands your history and will tie the tubes.
I also made bad choices in my younger days,some which resulted in my daughter being taken away.Now older,wiser and fatter I am raising my a son by myself.I wish you all the luck in the world and the wisdom top make the right decision for the babe.
hugs,
jackie

sweety look every1 makes mistakes what matters is that you'v realized what your mistakes are and you trying to do something about that's good and i give you props on that. As fare as what you should do only you can answer that question cause you already know what your choices are you not looking for help like you said your vest venting so be my guest and vent all you like. As for this guy Brian obviously your the 1 person in the world who has never mad a mistake and if your not don't be so quick to start throwing stones. Every person in life has to find there own path. Every mistake you make is nothing but a chance to learn a new lesson. I think she is showing amazing courage just by posting this comment and you shouldnt be the 1 to put her down telling her things that she new in the first place in the pursuit of starting or winning a debait at her expense. I guess in simpler terms if you have nothing helpful to say then don't speak at all. If you need anything at all im a teacher and i know a lot of programs to help struggling parent. Let me know what i can do to help.

as far as having your tubes tied, it iIS illegal in some states (new york or michigan is one, as an example) for a doctor to tie a ladies tubes if she is under a certain age. This is because the state wants to "make sure" that a lady has the chance to have a family later on in life if she wants to.

I myself do not agree with thsi law, but it is still the law.

For the record, for those who dont already know, I am a divorced fatehr with sole custody (legal and physical) of both of our children. Theirmother has supervised visitation only, is required to pay 88 dollars a month for support (when she takes home over 1600 dollars a month). She fails to pay the support so regualryl tha she is again over five hundred dollars behind.
i am trying to get back on welfare now that I have completed my move back to new york. My youngest son is severely disturbed, emotionally, and I can not work while he is not in school as he lashes out at every care provider I find for him (and there younger children as well).


Shortimix came out, stated she understood she had a problem with looking at the wrong men i the first place. She also stated how at age 17, her abusive (yes in m/o abusive) parent(s) manipulted her into giving up her child, claiming she owuld just lose him anyway and never see him again, etc. etc. etc.
She has also stated that she has tried going to the doctor to have her tubes tied (state did nto allow it due to her age), and seek other forms of conception control (instead of birth). For whatever reason, she has been told no or advised against them so far.

Now her onlt option left is abstinance. At least until she can find conception control that she can use. She came in here looking to vent, and release some pent up stress and anxiety (and who here has not needed to do so in the past? I could name specific instances on several people who bashed her in here already), and instead people decided to stone her. men and women alike.

Shame on you all.

Shorti, if you need to vent or need advise, feel free to email me at any time. I can nto garuntee knowing much abou tyour personal situation(s), but if ntohing else I can listen and offer advise on who to go to to get the information you need.
Good luck and best wishes.


oh, and dont ever think you have doen the wrong thing by choosing adoption, especially when abortion was the other side of the coin. your children are nwo getting to live their lives because yu chose adoption instead of abortion.