IM SITTING HERE WONDERING,WHY WAS I CURSED WITH THIS HEART PROBLEM?? NO
BODY ON EARTH WILL EVER LOVE ME.JUST CAUSE I HAVE THIS DOESNT MEAN IM A
BAD PERSON,I NEED SOMEONE AS BAD AS EVER,BUT THEY ALL RUN WHEN THEY FIND
OUT,IM DONE...I WILL PERISH ALONE

I know what it's like to feel the blackness.
I have bipolar disorder. I have high highs and super low lows.
It really fucks with my emotions. In my opinion the
people that run from you cos the chips are down
are doing you a favor. It would be far worse, in my opinion,
to be surrounded by those assholes than to be alone. You
are not alone tho. You have a friend in me and I'm sure
other people here consider you a friend. The best way to
know who really cares about you is to see how they react
when things don't look good. The people who are still around
then are the ones you wanna be with. I feel kinda blue right
now myself so I can identify with how you feel right now.
The Bible says that there is crying at night, but joy
commeth in the morning. I've been laying on my couch all night
feeling sorry for myself so sorry it took so long for me
to respond to your post. You're a great person and stop
thinking you'll perish alone- it will only bring you down.

i understand how u feel, i have my own problems but the big thing i have
2 deal with is as soon as people find out my baby girl is disabled they
run. my health issues scare em alittle but for some reason when i tell
them that my 22 month old daughter is developmentally delayed and only
has most of her skills between 9-11 months they run. the ones that have
stuck around have told me that they r better people because of sis and
that they dont know what they would do with out seein her all the time
cause of how happy she is all the time. so dont worry bout bein alone
rite now, there is someone out there that is gonna believe that they r a
better person just because of ur strength. i know its not one of my own
personal vertues i have but be patient. i am a firm believer that
everything happens for a reason.

I am sorry if my post to your other thread hit home. I know it is so
true though. I found out who my friends were. Hell even my ex wife could
not handle having a husband that could not work a "real" job. It was our
change in life style that finished off our marriage I believe as I was
open to her being bisexual. We went from traveling every year and having
money to living in the projects with nearly nothing because of my
injuries. I found even alot of my family turned their backs on me when I
was no longer useful to them. My only friend is someone that we grew so
far apart during high school we never spend much time together but it is
always a pleasure to see him come around about once every other month.
All we have in common is our old school days. Out of the 30 or 40 close
friends I thought I had I only have one true friend.

I emailed you once before my picture was but up and not to long after
that the no picture post was brought up. I guess you deleted it without
reading it that someone tried to get to know you better. I am still open
to be your friend and maybe your lover if things progressed that way. We
all need love no matter if we only have a few more minutes on this earth
or a hundred years left.

You my dear, need to count your blessings! You obviously have many good
things in your life. There are sooooo many people in this world that
are worse off than you, much worse. Im not trying to discount your
feelings of hopelessness, but this life has so many wonderful things to
offer besides physical relationships with people. In your case, I think
that you will
find your special someone, if you can shake your negative attitude. I
once took care of an 800 lb lady who had a special boyfriend that loved
her very much. He cared for her lovingly
and without question as he washed her and kissed her gently.
This couple had been dating for only a couple of years. The woman had
been 800 lbs the entire time. I have had many heart
patients, including heart transplant patients (before and after surgery)
who have met and married and spent there lives with that person. Dont
ever think that there will never be anyone for you. There will be! You
are a cute girl. I know that you
have a lot to offer another human besides your health problems.
Turn to God with your woes, He will always be there for you.
Give it all to God, because it sounds like youre having trouble
handling it on your own. God will take your worries and give
you some very special things in return. Just believe with all
your heart and soul and ask the Lord to come into your life completely.
He will. I promise!

WELL GOD HAS NEVER BEEN THERE FOR ME,THANK YOU ANYWAYS FOR THE KIND
WORDS....

It is always amazing to me that just when I feel (even though I know
better) that my life and the hand I have been dealt is the worst on the
planet, I realize that maybe it isnt so bad. If I had two hearts to
give, I would gladly give you one so you didnt have to feel the way you
do.
I have lost everything, including my kids, more than once in my life and
I have gotten so tired of being taken advantage of because Im nice to
others. I just do how I was raised and still find that even though I
get kicked in the teeth by life, I have to keep pushing through all the
gray clouds to the silver lining.
I firmly believe that there IS most definitely someone out there for
EVERYONE... your someone just hasnt been placed in your life's path as
yet. No I dont have anyone special in my life except for my family and
my kids... and with all of the bad and traumatic I have been through, Im
still searching for that silver lining and MY special someone... I also
have health issues but nothing compared to what some of you have posted
on here... My heart and my prayers go out to each and everyone of
you.... a friend of mine has a very special saying and it has gotten her
thru so many difficult times.... Just be yourself cuz everyone else is
taken..... and most importantly... KEEP SHINING.

God has always been there for you. All you need to do is call
his name and mean it. You will know when the time is right.
God exists inside of each of us. He is very familiar with your
pain. His spirit is a part of our being and our consciousness.
God loves us unconditionally. We are here in our human form only to
learn lessons of light and love for our spiritual evolvement. God has
always been with you and will always be with you. There is nothing you
can do to get away from that.
Many people attempt to be angry and tough and hateful but sadly
our human form dies as it lives. Its called free choice.
I have sat holding the hand of many patients who are alone as
their body dies. It is a very sad thing to witness. Whereas
folks who have lived their lives with love, kindness and
generosity are surrounded by the people who love them. The only
thing that a person cares about on their death bed is who they
love and all the good that came out of that love, because ultimately
that is why we are here. As the spirit comes closer
to returning to where it came from it all becomes quite clear.
When you and I come to that point I want all the love of Gods'
spirit to be around us and within us. I know you do too. I will
pray for you.

UH OK....GO FOR IT

listen u r still alive so ya God has done sumthing 4 u u just have to
surrender totally to him. God loves every1 we just have to believe and
accept him and accept and believe in his healing