Surprisingly TTO, I got almost all of my free shirts this year in my size. I got one free chopper xl with long arms.

Dear diary.....I think biker successfully marked his territory and he didnt even have to lift his leg!!!

Dear diary.........I need my belly button rubbed!!!

make a wish!!! ahaaaaaaaaaaaaahahaaaaaaa!!

gypsy is a genie???

that or buddha!!!! Somebody called me a genie here the other night!!!

That you sweety!!!! When do I get the bill for the advice??? Have a Great Day

Hey danny!!! You can pay me in chips and dip!!!

These two guys are walking along the sidewalk
and see an old dog laying in the grass licking his balls.

One guy says "Gee, I wish I could do that."
The other guy says:



"Well you better pet him first."

eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!! CATCH!!

Purple

> A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital,
> wearing an oxygen mask over
> his mouth and nose.
>
> A young, student nurse appears to give him a partial
> sponge bath.
>
> Nurse', he mumbles, from behind the mask. 'Are my
> testicles
> black?' Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, 'I
> don't know, Sir.
> I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet'
>
> He struggles to ask again, 'Nurse, please check. Are
> my
> testicles black?'
>
> Concerned that he may elevate his blood pressure and
>
> heart rate from worry about his testicles,
> she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the
> covers. She raises his
> gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his
> testicles in the other.
>
> Then, she takes a close look and says, There's
> nothing wrong
> with them, Sir!'
>
> The man pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and
> says
> very slowly, 'Thank you very much. That was
> wonderful, but, listen very,
> very closely......
>
> A r e - m y - t e s t - r e s u l t s - b a c k?

Tetanus Shot



An old man in his mid-eighties struggles to get up
from the couch then starts putting on his coat. His
wife, seeing the unexpected behavior, asks,

'Where are you going?'

He replies, 'I'm going to the doctor.'
She says, 'Why, are you sick?'

He says, 'Nope, I'm going to get me some of that
Viagra stuff.'


Immediately the wife starts working and positioning
herself to get out of her rocker and begins to put
on her coat.
He says, 'Where the heck are you going'?

She answers, 'I'm going to the doctor, too.'
He says, 'Why, what do you need?'

She says, 'If you're going to start using that rusty old thing, I'm getting a Tetanus shot.'

Dear Playboy,

I've never written to you before, but I really need your advice.

I have suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs: the phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up.

My wife has been going out with "the girls" a lot recently; although when I ask their names, she always says, " Just some friends from work. You don't know them". I always try to stay awake to look out for her coming home, but I usually fall asleep.

Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife. I think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth; but last night she went out again, and I decided to really check on her.

Around midnight, I decided to hide in the garage behind my golf clubs so I could get a good view of the whole street when she arrived home from a night out with "the girls".

When she got out of the car, she was buttoning up her blouse, which was open, and she took her panties out of her purse and slipped them on.

It was at that moment, crouching behind my clubs, that I noticed that the graphite shaft on my driver appeared to have a hairline crack right by the club head.

Is this something I can fix myself, or should I take it back to the pro-shop where I bought it?

A Concerned Golfer.

Due to recent budget cuts and the rising cost of electricity, gas,
and oil...the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.

We apologize for any inconvenience.