ok background is my son is 5mo old... he was born premature at 33wks gestation... so as some of you may know I gotta be careful with his diet etc... cause his immune system is funky and his digestive system isnt as on track as it would be... and I recently had to put him into daycare... which I was reluctant to do but you gotta do whatcha gotta do right? anyways... this lady is on the list of approved people for a program im in where they pay for the care... and she is the ONLY one who has room for infants... so I went ahead and went with her... no one has said bad things about her etc.... well my first problem was when she asked me if it was ok for her to take the baby out of his car seat while he was there... and as weird of a question as this was I can get past that... then a few days later shes a bit freaked out and asks me why my sons neck is red.... O.o im thinking 'your joking right?' but I told her what was causing it which is the fact hes round, and drooly... creases dont get much air on babies either... lol... which I can over look as well... HOWEVER she is totally fired for this one... I have recently started giving my son juices and foods per my doctors orders and am working closely with him as to which foods etc... and my daycare lady knows this cause I have sent him to daycare with a bottle containing diluted carrot juice... and once with a jar of baby food... and she told me if I wanted her to feed him anything special (besides his formula... which is for preemies) to put it in the diaper bag... well silly me thought that included juices... well I went to get him today and she informs me that she gave him mixed fruit juice.... I literally felt me heart drop in my chest... and started getting a little pissy... then I saw my son and it took all I had not to slap the crud outa her.... his face was all red (kinda like a heat rash but not cause he was in airconditioning all day).... and later when I got him home and was changing his clothes his back was covered in spots... kinda like big mosquito bites... an obvious allergic reaction... thank god it wasn't a serious reaction...!!! but do you guys think im wrong for not taking him back? I have been told I should give her another chance... and it's an honest mistake etc... but she seems to know less than I do and shes been daycare for 5+ years plus is a foster mom.... and that scares me....

There are a lot of periods in there....

Like....WOAH!!

The student nurse says run for the hills!

I have twin grandsons, 21 months old now. They also were 33 weeks premature.

My advice is to take him back there, sit this lady day and go over everything that he can and cannot have due to his condition. Write it on a piece of paper so there is no mistakes about it. Daycare workers get confused sometimes.

Give her another chance, once she learns that she could have killed your baby she will be more careful in the future.

Took a long time to make my babies daycare workers understand the importance of their diet but once they did everything worked out. They now treat the twins as if they were their own children.

Grats on the grandbabies :D

I tried talking to her about it before I left today but she wasn't listening to me... and I honestly am afraid that shes going to "forget" and she knows hes not supposed to have anything I don't give him... I told her that the first time I met her... I told her that I am introducing him to new foods but I dont want him having anythign other than his formula... which sometimes she doesnt even give him... for some reason gives him plain water?

Honestly if you are going to have free daycare then you can't be picky. why don't you pay for it yourself and put him somewhere decent? I know it's expensive but we all have to make sacrifices for our kids.

even if it is free, you need to make sure that you shild will be safe!

Honestly, I think this is partly your fault. You need to set up an appt with her where she will have the time to talk to ONLY you. You need to give her the directions on how to take care of your baby and how to feed him. Sure she is in daycare but if your child has special directions, you are responcible for that. Don't expect her to know everything..thats crazy on your part!!
I know that as parents we want the best for our children, so you NEED to make the time to talk to this lady about your child. Good luck

there ya go

I have a 5month old daughter not a preemie but she's my only get a nrw babysitter if you can't afford a good well whose faults that? I'm 25 my ex-husband doesn't pay a penny but i gotta deal.........

Having run my own daycare sucessfully when my children were younger, I made sure to have a very detailed interview with prospective parents before taking on their children. I had a written list of questions covering everything imaginable pertaining to their child/children. Including any special diet.
If I noticed the slightest change after giving a new food I would immediately let the parent know with a phone call.
I agree that you can never be to careful with your children when it comes to good quality daycare. If she can't make the time to sit down and have an extensive interview with you about your childs special needs then I think you need to look elsewhere.
It's a shame that someone that has been in the business that long didn't take better care and caution. I can understand getting busy when you're by yourself trying to take care of so many children. But I feel if you're running a daycare out of your home and you have a special needs child then you should cut your child ratio down by at least one so that you have the time to properly take care of that child.
I wish you the best of luck in whatever you decide to do.

I say quit if you have even the slighest doubt about the care your child is getting.........if she "almost" killed your child i wouldn;t give her the chance to "almost" finish the job.........

remember you get what you pay for..........your not paying so i wouldn't expect a whole hell of a lot........you may have to suck it up and use family who have more "vested" in your childs well being and are more familiar with his/her needs, or go with a childcare provider who is specialized in special needs children......you'll pay dearly for it but it's your child your paying for

Whoa it has nothing to do with getting what you pay for it has EVERYTHING to do with a poor excuse for a licensed child care provider that totally ignored what you told her and what any half baked care giver would know which is You DO NOT introduce some one elses infant to a new food ESPECIALLY a PREEMIE !!! ANYONE that has read a minimum of materials printed about diet would not give a small infant MIXED fruit or MIXED cereal or anyting that the Mother did not provide for formula except pure water. Even then most Care providers insist that the parent provide the water because young infants can not always tolerate the chemicals in tap water.

The lesson to be learned to is LISTEN to your Mother's Instinct. The FIRST time you don't feel comfortable with a Child Care provider don't bother with the the AM I BEING FAIR thoughts GET YOUR CHILD AND LEAVE!

ANYTIME a Childcare provider expresses resentment or hesitance to listen to you or your instructions they should be HISTORY.

I think this CHild Care Provider needs to be reported to licenseing because several ways she failed as a care giver.

A child should never spend long periods in a careseat. They are not designed to be a bed or play position. They are designed to protect your child in transport.

Your child should not be left to be irritatied long periods in his own drool. If the provider is properly cleaning and dring him and occasionally changeing him he might be damp but he sohould not be saturated and irritated.

She should give your child water alternateing with the formula you provide but you should NOT be comeing back to find that your baby has not consumed the expected amount of formula. She just doesn't want to be bothered with warming the formula or even getting it out of the refrigerator if your child has graduated to that stage something I would doubt as a premmie but absolutely should not be allowing formula to set opened and unrefrigerated for more than short periods for the obvious reasons of spoilage. An excellent reason for provideing several small bottles of powdered formula and bottled water to add so that your PREEMIE is getting several small fresh feedings.

It is highly more likely that she is leaveing your child lay and never burping or only "feeding"; and I use the term loosely because water is hydration not nutrition; because the spit up from water is less foul than formula.

That your child obviously had an allegic reaction to something and could have died was criminal neglect. That she did not call you immediately or from a ER to have the baby checked out is beyond my comprehension. Maybe she discounted it to "heat rash" but a baby who has and inflamed face should have been brought to your immediate attention and segregated from the other kids until a determination was made to the cause. Most reputable providers would require you bring a pediatricians note the child was recovered if the inflamation didn't abate with cooling. You are very lucky in deed that your child did not die of respiratory failure if the rash you are describeing was allergic or from Heat stroke if it was from being overheated for a long period laying in a car seat.

I would caution any Custodial parent to NEVER EVER think that they will some how be excused from finding safe and adequate care for a child simp;y because the other parent doesn't pay enough OR the State only provides substandard follow through in provideing workers for the programs they fund. If your baby suffers or dies you will be responsible. Not just morally but legally. If you leave your child where you even suspect that care is inadequate you are contributing to the abuse and judges are throwing the book at parents as well as providers who "endorse" substandard care because they would rather go to whatever else is there than stay with a child if adequate care is not available. Sadly it often is not and the consequence is your life is on shut down in defference to your childs need s until it does.

I would encourage anyone struggleing to find adequate child care to contact United Way First Call for Help, Salvation Army, Red Cross, Child Action, YOur child SUpport Enforcement office the United Council of Churches, Jewish Vocational Services, Your local Community College Special Student Services coordinator, Mother's of Multiples, Parents WIthout Partner's, the local Department of Health, HeadStart, National PTA, American Legion or Veterans of Foreign Wars, any miltary base has an Excepional Family Member Program social work program, your local police, fire, or public hospital for co-op day cares, or Women's shelters even the prison if your child's other parent is incarcerated. Many of these programs have scholarships to subsideize all or part of your daycare needs and all of them have lists of providers that they will often send you free or for something as small as a stamped self addressed envelope so save your gas and let your fingers do the walking. The trick is to keep looking and planning for when your needs change. Providers rarely give you notice and you always want a back up plan. Few parents are lucky enought to use just one provider for care or funding. GOOD LUCK GOOD LUCK GOOD LUCK Remember before you know it you will be grandma and babysitting for your kids' kids.

My granddaughter was a premie - 26 weeks and 6 days. 1 lb, 10 oz! She's 3 now - happy, healthy and quite bright. My daughter was told she could absolutely not have her in a daycare or around alot of people for a year. I understand if you have to; but be really careful where you put them. Most people are totally unaware - even if you tell them it doesn't quite sink in - what it takes in taking care of a premie and how different it is than taking care of a full term baby.

yeah, I would find a differant daycare...for your child's sake...I don't think any child care worker should give someones child (especially an infant) anything new without consent from the parent. Allergic reactions can vary from mild to severe...it is the providers fault, mistake or not.

Maybe sheis in the same position I am in. Local daycare costs 3.00 per child per hour, no breaks, and that is for cheaper care. I only make 7.40 an hour, andhave two kids, so that is six dollars an hour out of my check immediately. After taxes are taken out, that leaves me ten cents in the hole.

The child care assistance is their for a reason, and telling someone they should buck up and pay out of their own pocket when they cant is fairly asinine. If you have themoney to do so, all the power to you, and I am glad for your sake. But not all of us have that option.

I KNOW you didnt just say it is her own fault she can not afford decent child care.

:quote:I would encourage anyone struggleing to find adequate child care to contact United Way First Call for Help, Salvation Army, Red Cross, Child Action, YOur child SUpport Enforcement office the United Council of Churches, Jewish Vocational Services, Your local Community College Special Student Services coordinator, Mother's of Multiples, Parents WIthout Partner's, the local Department of Health, HeadStart, National PTA, American Legion or Veterans of Foreign Wars, any miltary base has an Excepional Family Member Program social work program, your local police, fire, or public hospital for co-op day cares, or Women's shelters even the prison if your child's other parent is incarcerated. Many of these programs have scholarships to subsideize all or part of your daycare needs and all of them have lists of providers that they will often send you free or for something as small as a stamped self addressed envelope so save your gas and let your fingers do the walking. The trick is to keep looking and planning for when your needs change. Providers rarely give you notice and you always want a back up plan. Few parents are lucky enought to use just one provider for care or funding. GOOD LUCK GOOD LUCK GOOD LUCK Remember before you know it you will be grandma and babysitting for your kids' kids.
:/quote:

Excellent post, thank you for the time in finding these agencies and listing them as many people dont realize they can be of assistance!

Honestly..I don't blame you that you can't afford your own daycare..what I do blame you for is not taking the time to sit down with the lady and discussing things with her. There is nothing wrong with getting assistance if you need it!! IF you don't like one daycare provider..don't question yourself or your feelings, SWITCH!! BUT you have to provide them with all the information about your child!!!