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Topic: was i right??
stevil342001's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:20 PM
Today i helped a friend of mine actually he is my AA sponser..i felt like i was sponsering him but thats what it all about..his wife is the most abusive women i ever met in my life ..constinaly cutting him down in front of his friends in front of me.. but this was going on all day...i asked him how do you do .. he says he ignores half of it ..well me being inrecovery i wouldnt tolerate any crap .. from anyone...i rreally wanted to say something to his wife but felt like it was none of my business.. do you think i was right not to say anything??

no photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:22 PM

Today i helped a friend of mine actually he is my AA sponser..i felt like i was sponsering him but thats what it all about..his wife is the most abusive women i ever met in my life ..constinaly cutting him down in front of his friends in front of me.. but this was going on all day...i asked him how do you do .. he says he ignores half of it ..well me being inrecovery i wouldnt tolerate any crap .. from anyone...i rreally wanted to say something to his wife but felt like it was none of my business.. do you think i was right not to say anything??
yes u were right...even if it sucks..thats his businessflowerforyou

Tazz42's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:22 PM
Edited by Tazz42 on Fri 06/27/08 02:22 PM
You did the right thing!
I, myself, have been in the same corner as your friend and it only makes it worse behind closed doors. It would have only fed the flame that he has to deal with when he is alone with her!
He will get sick of it sooner or later and it helps just to be there when he needs you!flowerforyou

FETTS61's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:22 PM
TALK TO YOUR SPONSER ABOUT IT....LOL
IF HE DEALS WITH IT , THAN THATS HIS CROSS TO BEAR
YOURE TRYING TO WORK ON YOUR OWN LIFE,HE WILL WORK ON HIS:wink:

burgundybry's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:22 PM
live and let live, stevil..not your issue..take care of yourself first, foremost and above all else..grats, btw!

DrJAC's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:22 PM
I think there are certain conflicts that we should not get involved in as friends. Conflicts b/w married people is one of them. Your job as his friend is to support him, not to yell at her. If she ever physically abused him, then that is a different story. I think you did the right thing. Good luck!

auburngirl's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:25 PM
yes you did the right thing by staying out of it. can't imagine living with a woman like that.

elwoodsully's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:25 PM
Edited by elwoodsully on Fri 06/27/08 02:25 PM
He's your buddy, she's his pain in the ass.. Your'e stuck in the middle. Had you have said something to her, she would have directed her attitude, both barrels, right at you. You might have been able to say to her... NAH.. Someone like that would not listen.. Man or woman..

stevil342001's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:26 PM
thanks i feel i did the right thing ..i always follow my gut and my gut said .. "shut up steve"

DestinysDream's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:27 PM
He would have told you off if you had said something. Yes you did the right thing. It is his life, not yours.

baroosie's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:28 PM
"Live and let live".........NOT! You did the right thing speaking to him.... speak to your sponsor too.....

BTW: She could be ruining his sobriety, as well as life....

How ya doin' man?!smokin

FETTS61's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:28 PM
A SAYING THE OLD TIMERS USED TO TELL ME,
TAKE THE COTTON OUTTA YOUR EARS AND PUT IT IN YOUR MOUTH
YOU MUSTA BEEN LISTENING TO THEM

stevil342001's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:29 PM

"Live and let live".........NOT! You did the right thing speaking to him.... speak to your sponsor too.....

BTW: She could be ruining his sobriety, as well as life....

How ya doin' man?!smokin

am good ..

livelife68's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:33 PM
You did the right thing. Make sure he gets the help he needs. He should be talking things over with his sponsor and you. He shouldn't be afraid to use the people in the program for support that's what everyone is there for.

duckiegiggles's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:34 PM
wow that sounds just like my mom no kidding

i always thought it was because she needed to get layed

burgundybry's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:38 PM

"Live and let live".........NOT! You did the right thing speaking to him.... speak to your sponsor too.....

BTW: She could be ruining his sobriety, as well as life....

How ya doin' man?!smokin




ok, what do i know..i've only been sober 25 years..no problems with him talking about matters with his sponsor, just saying , NOT his place to put himself in the affairs of his sponsor and his sponsor's wife..offering suggestions, what not, then fine..any more than that and better start hitting al anon too..peace

no photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:43 PM
you were right babe :heart: :heart:

Anyliz's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:48 PM
sweetheart...I think you did right, but I just want to share this with you: someone else than YOU need "help", in different ways...so, it´s up to you...it will be ok when you decide that is not your business, and would be ok if you decide to help somebody same way you got help sometime...

mcattygarnett's photo
Fri 06/27/08 02:55 PM
You did the right thing by not saying anything. That is his cross to bear. flowerforyou

cottonelle's photo
Fri 06/27/08 03:02 PM
you did the right thing, so lets go have a drink, you deseve it...lol

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