> Becoming Illegal (Actual letter from an Iowa resident and sent to
> his senator)
>
> The Honorable Tom Harkin
> 731 Hart Senate Office Building
> Phone (202) 224 3254
> Washington DC, 20510
>
> Dear Senator Harkin,
>
> As a native Iowan and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue
> Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted
> the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the
> process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.
>
> My primary reason for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen
> to illegal alien stems from the bill! whic h was recently passed by
> the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this
> bill's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in
> the United States for five years, all I need to do to become a
> citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the
> last five years. I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious
> to get the process started before everyone figures it out.
>
> Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay
> taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two
> years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way
> that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an
> excellent result for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes
> in 2004 and 2005.
>
>
> I haven't answered your response to my ad. I have been out of town on
family
> business for the past month. Best times for me to meet is weekdays 7am
to
> 2pm.
> I'm back in town now and ready for some play time.
> Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the local
> emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have
> stopped paying premiums for medical insurance, my accountant
> figures I could save almost $10,000 a year.
>
> Another benefit in gaining illegal status would be that my daughter
> would receive preferential treatment relative to her law school
> applications, as well as 'in-state' tuition rates for many colleges
> throughout the United States for my son.
>
> Lastly, I understand that illegal status would relieve me of the
> burden of renewing my driver's license and making those burdensome
> car insurance premiums. This is very important to me given that I
> still have college age children driving my car.
>
> If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become
> illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary
> forms, I would be most appreciative. Thank you for your assistance.
>
> Your Loyal Constituent,
> Donald Ruppert
> Burlington! , IA
>
> Get your Forms (NOW)!! Call your Internal Revenue Service
> 1-800-289-1040.
>

Devil is in the air

that guy is in the air!