I am sure most of us have heard the song that goes "If ya cant be with the one ya love, love the one you're with". This is making some sense, as I find myself in a situation where I have to do this....

....How fair is it for the one I'm with? Does it mean she is second best? How do you just stop loving someone to love another so it is fair?

Ask her best friend out.

thanks for the smart a** answer....I am being serious.

If you can not be with the one you love... why be with anyone at all??

Is it really fair to you to not be with the person you wish to be with?

Is it really fair to be with someone else who you can not give your all to?


Does this one who you love, love you back?? Just wondering he he

lmao

maybe that song is saying make the best of the situation, you know

Your very welcome.

It would depend on if the one your with knows that's all she is and if she feels the same way. It wouldn't work for me, but I hear it works for some.

It's funny, I was thinking something totally different. I would have completed the subject line with, "Be the one you would love". Eventually a match happens, as long as we're willing to wait for it. Some love songs are really pathetic. (Listening to the hot)

Put yourself in their place. Would you want someone to be with you if they didn't love you? Sounds like she's getting a raw deal.

No, the one I love decided after 10 years that it was ok to sleep with any man who flirted with her.

Yeah, I am thinking she is getting a raw deal, but she says she understands and accepts that.

Even if a woman says she "understands and accepts it," it usually means she's crushed and feels she can't get any better. It's all just sad.

Ouch Sorry to hear that babe... Life is crazy like that.

She may say that but that is def not how she truly feels. I mean HELLO... would you be just plain out okay and acceptable to be with some one who you know is not able to love you like you want and deserved to be?

No, I would not. She is awesome and everything, but I still cant get my ex off my heart. It has been 18 months without her. I want to move on...but dang, how do you escape feelings?

You don't escape feelings, you sort through them. It helps if you don't get involved with anyone new until the other issue has been resolved.

Dissolved love + Rebound = drama/someone's getting burned

Resolved + Involved = new love

err... something like that

then let it go

I have to say it's been almost a year since the break with my ex of 10 years and I know I'm not ready for serious dating or a relationship because of my own confusion and feelings. Time does heal but you have to give an opportunity and not rush into anything doesn't mean you can't still see people and have fun, but it's not fair to her if she thinks you're in a serious committed relationship and you're still in love with your ex. If the shoe was on the other foot and she was doing that to you how would you feel??

Coming out of a long relationship is hard... especially if you are still hurting and it wasn't something that you initiated.

Maybe you're just not ready...