Community > General Discussion

Topic: dating question
sloehand Joined Sat 04/19/08 Posts: 180	Sun 05/04/08 08:29 AM
most of the time things like that cause problems , headed for a headache and heartache . tell it straight !

cplichristmd Joined Sat 11/03/07 Posts: 1557	Sun 05/04/08 08:30 AM
most of the time things like that cause problems , headed for a headache and heartache . tell it straight ! thats what i think

No1sLove Joined Wed 04/16/08 Posts: 10342	Sun 05/04/08 08:30 AM Edited by No1sLove on Sun 05/04/08 08:31 AM
Maybe she knows her parents would feel the same as me about it...that separated is not divorced....and you aught to wait. Sorry, Chris, but you asked for opinions. thats cool but she is not waiting for other things if you know what i mean but thanks for posting no problem...didn't say it to offend, just throwing out a possibility.

lil_bit Joined Fri 01/25/08 Posts: 1685	Sun 05/04/08 08:30 AM
Are there a few issues here? Her parents know that you are separated and have a child, but cannot tell their daughter? She doesn't want to listen/hear about your separation or your child? You keep bringing all of this up even though you know it's not a comfortable topic? Better think long and hard as to what is really going on....

shoesmonkey Joined Sat 01/19/08 Posts: 7088	Sun 05/04/08 08:30 AM
Maybe her parent's do know. And she is afraid of telling you how they are about it.

cplichristmd Joined Sat 11/03/07 Posts: 1557	Sun 05/04/08 08:33 AM
Maybe her parent's do know. And she is afraid of telling you how they are about it. perhaps

sandradee1961 Joined Mon 03/10/08 Posts: 1411	Sun 05/04/08 08:33 AM
Some people believe - VERY STRONGLY - that it isn't over until the paperwork is filed. Her parents could be like that. you may be right but she should have said so before she asked me out i think. It could be that she is okay with it but doesn't want to hear lectures from others. The only way to really find out would be to ask her why.

CleanBathroom Joined Thu 02/07/08 Posts: 5544	Sun 05/04/08 08:33 AM
Maybe she knows her parents would feel the same as me about it...that separated is not divorced....and you aught to wait. Sorry, Chris, but you asked for opinions. The voice of reason has made its presence felt.

cplichristmd Joined Sat 11/03/07 Posts: 1557	Sun 05/04/08 08:34 AM
Are there a few issues here? Her parents know that you are separated and have a child, but cannot tell their daughter? She doesn't want to listen/hear about your separation or your child? You keep bringing all of this up even though you know it's not a comfortable topic? Better think long and hard as to what is really going on.... no they dont know i am spereated they just think i am some guy.

tanyaann Joined Mon 12/03/07 Posts: 32220	Sun 05/04/08 08:35 AM
how does she feel about you having a child? Maybe she is just waiting until things are more serious between you two before she tells her family. You might want to asked her how her family would feel about you having a child? i have and she avoids the question lol. well maybe you need to back off a little and give her time to decided if she is ready to handle this all herself. Because if she isn't comfortable telling her family, then she might be sure about the whole thing.

cplichristmd Joined Sat 11/03/07 Posts: 1557	Sun 05/04/08 08:38 AM
how does she feel about you having a child? Maybe she is just waiting until things are more serious between you two before she tells her family. You might want to asked her how her family would feel about you having a child? i have and she avoids the question lol. well maybe you need to back off a little and give her time to decided if she is ready to handle this all herself. Because if she isn't comfortable telling her family, then she might be sure about the whole thing. maybe maybe

Thomas27 Joined Sun 10/21/07 Posts: 4860	Sun 05/04/08 08:40 AM
If I was seeing someone that was separated, I would probably wait before telling my parents. Simply, because I know they want the best for me and would have strong opinions about me getting caught in the middle of something. Especially if there is a child involved. Hope it works out for you.

sandradee1961 Joined Mon 03/10/08 Posts: 1411	Sun 05/04/08 08:41 AM
If I was seeing someone that was separated, I would probably wait before telling my parents. Simply, because I know they want the best for me and would have strong opinions about me getting caught in the middle of something. Especially if there is a child involved. Hope it works out for you. Well said.

lil_bit Joined Fri 01/25/08 Posts: 1685	Sun 05/04/08 08:41 AM
Are there a few issues here? Her parents know that you are separated and have a child, but cannot tell their daughter? She doesn't want to listen/hear about your separation or your child? You keep bringing all of this up even though you know it's not a comfortable topic? Better think long and hard as to what is really going on.... no they dont know i am spereated they just think i am some guy. Well, the bigger you make this issue, the bigger the reaction will be. I suggest that you mention your status in passing conversation to her WITH her parents...they should certainly understand and appreciate your honesty and perhaps be more comfortable with you.

cplichristmd Joined Sat 11/03/07 Posts: 1557	Sun 05/04/08 08:42 AM
Are there a few issues here? Her parents know that you are separated and have a child, but cannot tell their daughter? She doesn't want to listen/hear about your separation or your child? You keep bringing all of this up even though you know it's not a comfortable topic? Better think long and hard as to what is really going on.... no they dont know i am spereated they just think i am some guy. Well, the bigger you make this issue, the bigger the reaction will be. I suggest that you mention your status in passing conversation to her WITH her parents...they should certainly understand and appreciate your honesty and perhaps be more comfortable with you. but i have never met them

PragmaticMind Joined Mon 02/25/08 Posts: 1098	Sun 05/04/08 08:42 AM
I have 2 daughters.. and if I were with a man who didn't explain details to his family of my situation (as well as his) as he's suddenly apart of it.. I too would do what you've done, which is bring up the conversation. However, if a conversation like that is avoided.. then there is no reason for me to continue. My daughters acceptance and place in a relationship of mine is far too important to me and a good mother, than a person who doesn't wish to mention to others the package deal.

Thomas27 Joined Sun 10/21/07 Posts: 4860	Sun 05/04/08 08:43 AM
Perhaps you should take that vacation a little early Chris!

cplichristmd Joined Sat 11/03/07 Posts: 1557	Sun 05/04/08 08:44 AM
maybe lol

FAK Joined Fri 10/19/07 Posts: 7817	Sun 05/04/08 08:44 AM
Maybe she knows her parents would feel the same as me about it...that separated is not divorced....and you aught to wait. Sorry, Chris, but you asked for opinions. The voice of reason has made its presence felt. True, true, true....no one needs or wants to be a rebound...and a child needs stability...speaking from experience

cplichristmd Joined Sat 11/03/07 Posts: 1557	Sun 05/04/08 08:45 AM
I have 2 daughters.. and if I were with a man who didn't explain details to his family of my situation (as well as his) as he's suddenly apart of it.. I too would do what you've done, which is bring up the conversation. However, if a conversation like that is avoided.. then there is no reason for me to continue. My daughters acceptance and place in a relationship of mine is far too important to me and a good mother, than a person who doesn't wish to mention to others the package deal. i know but i dont want to break up with her this early over it yet. she is a nice girl and i want to give her a chance. and do you have any idea on how hard it is for me to get a girlfriend lol. it took me a year.