I'm not sure that's true. It would depend on whether they are willing to communicate, and not get offended. I spent 17 years with my last boyfriend. Great guy with a heart of gold, but lousy in bed. Spent years trying to communicate my needs. He wouldn't listen and was insulted by every suggestion that I made to make things better. It literally ruined our relationship. As time passed I became more and more frustrated that my needs were not being addressed and he had taken so many of my suggestions as personal attacks that it slowly just took over the rest of our relationship until all that was left were arguments and hurt feelings on both sides of the fence. Both partners need to be willing to listen and try to not get personally insulted. It wasn't like this was a short term relationship. There was major time invested and as time goes by if both people are not doing their part to understand the other person's side to the situation it can get really ugly. Trust me I know.

Upstate NY here!

I do, but there are always more! Way too many!

Another good idea to get rid of the scammers would be to put an option on the search page to only include members who participate in the forums. This would be a double edged sword, because if someone doesn't choose to participate in the forums they would be excluded, but at least we would know the profiles that we are seeing are for real people. I have heard several times that scammers don't last 5 minutes in the forums. So why not use that to the advantage of the people who are seriously looking?

Not sure, but I would guess they sell the email addresses and phone numbers to companies who create mailing lists or data banks that other companies then pay that company to generate lead lists for products they want to sell. I know Insurance companies pay for lists of people they can send out lead cards to in hopes that they will send the card back to them as being interested in insurance. It's a billion dollar lead business.

I am starting to agree with you! Seems there are very few real people left on this site. I am seriously thinking it's time to just deactivate my account and remain single. There are so many that it's impossible to even weed them out. I have been a member since November and I would swear that I have only spoke to one person I know was truly real. The Skype thing is a great idea, but I don't understand why the site builders don't just add a location verification to the profile creation process? It would be a piece of programming that just verifies the IP address of the incoming information with the information that is being entered when a profile is created. If they don't match then the profile can't be created or throws an error message saying I'm sorry but the information in your profile doesn't match our verification information please check your information and try again.

Great idea, but why do you say they wouldn't last the day? The guy I was talking to was very convincing. He was not reading from a script like some do. He seemed very real and answered most of my questions with what seemed like good answers. If he had not asked my for really expensive things when I offered to send him a care package that was intended to be filled with things like baked goods and toiletries and then gave me an address that I was almost positive was not military then I'd still be talking with him. The only reason I was suspicious of the address is because I'm a former military wife and was aware that packages sent to the deployed all go to APO-FPO addresses. If I was someone who never had any dealings with the military I may not have even questioned him. To be honest I had to look up where Nigeria was vs. Libya and I wouldn't have done that if it wasn't for the fact that the non APO-FPO address was a red flag for me.

Again thanks for the info. I'm glad you not angry with me.

Thank you for the valuable information and your military service. I was not trying to make it harder for real military personnel to find someone. I was just trying to help people not get scammed. I didn't know that service members were told to not give out their email addresses. Can you give any insight into what someone who legitimately wants to date service members can ask for from a service member so they will know they are who they say they are. This information would help both service members and those who want to date them.

There seems to be scammers on this site posing as members of the military who are claim to be on deployment. I spent several days chatting with someone who seemed very real and plausible at first and then after a while the conversations turned to him asking me to send him a cell phone and boots to an address in Nigeria. He had told me he was deployed in Libya, which is on the other side of the continent from Nigeria. The address also had someone else's name as the person the package was to be delivered to. When I asked why the package was to be sent to someone other than him, he replied that the person in question was in charge of getting packages to soldiers. I was a military wife years ago and my ex had done a 6 month deployment in Iraq in 1993. When he was there every package that was sent to him was either sent to an APO or FPO address with his own name as the recipient. So this made me nervous because I had already noticed that the FB page that the person had given me had very little personal information on it and was excessively limited on information. So I started to research online for information about the name he had given me. When I did every search brought up topics on Nigerian Dating scams. So I then started to research how to tell if the person you were talking to might be a scammer. I found a blog written by a person in the military that was warning people how to weed out the scammers. He said a fool proof way to get rid of a scammer was to ask them to give you their military email address because all true military personnel have one and if they say the don't you would know they were lying. So I took that advice and I have not had one response from the guy I was talking to since. Now, made he was offended, I don't know, but it seems fishy if you ask me. So please be careful and use the tip from the blog before you give out any personal information to someone claiming to be a member of the military on this site. I hope this helps someone keep from getting emotionally involved with a scammer who is only looking to cash in on an unsuspecting person who is genuinely looking for love.