Hi Anilou

Lines of relationships and lines in relationships is what makes or breaks true loyality. One thing he needs for sure is for a man (maybe a friend of yours) to sit him down and tell him that he is and has stepped over one of these lines knowingly or not. You would not have started this thread if this was not the case. Someone needs to help him understand that this is a potential loaded gun. This thing is more black and white than you think.

One thing you need to realize though is that him touching you and kissing you, is just that, and is not him thinking he is touching your daughter.

Keep this in mind, sons don't cop a feel from their mom, unless they have issues. If you and him have this mom
/son relationship and he is doing this with you it is not truly a mom and son relationship. He has issues.

If this statement "I do genuinely love him as a person and a friend and like a son" is true then certainly you should have no problem getting this straightened out.

"hey, I love you like a son, stop touching me that way cause sons don't do that"

Did you like it when he did this? Tell him, that's what friends do.

That's not so hard to say you know. Stop! If I love someone, think of them as a friend and a son, there would be no stopping me from being straight to the point about crossing this line he has.

Want me to call him LOL. Honestly though this is not that tough.

had to edit this at the end cause I said touch instead of tough

see now you got me thinking about touching someone lol

Just remember that you are the adult and he is still in learning mode, teach him.

Now watch we'll be reading about you and him having a famous affair on the news. Great, and they'll put my post up as someone who talked to you about it. Wait, I hear the news team outside the door now.

Sorry, just making light of something I know you can handle without it turning bad. good luck

Well, I'm 99 percent sure the heat is not only for your daughter. I'm 98 percent sure that your feelings have grown a little in that direction too. May be difficult to admit but there is something coming through your words that say this.

We tell ourselves a lot of things to get us to believe that it's not fire when it really is. If it wasn't the talk would have already happened.

I'm not saying it's a good thing or a bad thing, only that it's a thing and your part of it.

My concern is that nobody (too late) gets bearnt by this flame. Your relationships have already been changed due to this and your looking (to me anyway) like your trying to talk herself into believing one way when it has already gone another.

Lets cut out the booze talk, there's something going on that is making both your daughter and ex feel like there is something going on. Maybe it hasn't gone to the next level, but if they can sense it you can pretty much take it to the bank.

Here's what I recommend. Remove yourself from these posts you have writen and look at them as if you were someone reading this as a third party. What do you think this person writing these posts is saying? I can tell you that I (maybe most of us) are seeing some feelings in the mix. We're not judging those feelings just letting you know we're seeing them. At least I do.

Hope all this works out without some real damage. My thought is to face it head on one way or another and make it right with all involved.

you dont ''believe'' boy has sexual feeling here,YET you are confused about his sexually leaning actions??????

Ok,
I bow out!

Ya know, when people spend a lot of time together, you can't help but get clos and feelings deepen. Taking the time to talk to him about it in a compassionate way may help both of you figure out where things stand. I firmly believe that age should not be a barrier to love, so I wouldn't let that stand in the way; as previously mentioned, y'all just need to be clear about how you want to proceed.

My experience has been that if I even get an inkling that there is "something else going on" there usually is. Trust your instincts. Listen to your heart. Do what is right for you. All the best to you in your journey.

Well,
You know what you want to do...
You know what you want to be the outcome....
You know how you feel....
You dont really know what this young man is feeling though!!

So,
Some bit of distance will put a stop to the sexual thoughts boy has toward you-that is,if thats what you want!?

Because,the closer you get,the more attracted he will be towards you,and the more time you spend together,the easier it gets,for him to muster the courage to go further in actions!


Especially with alcohol involved!
And i tell you,you might not resist it......

And then,you also said you and young man have only each other-or something like that!

Sounds like theres something beyond what you are telling us,mho!
But,
You also think,he could be seeing a little bit of your daughter in you-wonder what that trully means; you and daughter look alike?? You feel the need to feel young-like your daughter?? You and daughter act the same??

Btw,
What exactly is it that you need help sorting out??
Because,basing on your responses on here, i say,you got it under control,your mind is set on keeping young man,whether daughter likes it or not!

You got divorced because your ex thought you and your daughter's ex were doing the deed? And you still see him? You must really like this young man.
I'm just wondering though, he thinks of you as a mom, but do you see him as a son? Are you considering taking him up on the more he seems to drunkenly be trying to put on the table?

And what does your daughter think about you hanging out with her ex?
You say he wants her back, are you actively trying to help them get back together?

Being a gorwn up,am sure you know whats really going on here!!!

We all know that,what a person does when drunk,has done before when not drunk-in his/her mind! Alcohol just gives them that courage they need!!

So,my dear,soon,very soon,it will be a full on French kiss,and actual fondling/gropping!!