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Community > Posts By > SimplyElla
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Topic:
50 cent
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 That is silly!
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Topic:
Screwed Twice
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A loud scream comes from the bedroom and the husband runs in. He sees a guy leaping out of the window.
Wife yells: That guy just screwed me twice! Husband: Twice? Why didn't you call me in after he screwed you once? Wife: Because I thought it was you, until he started the second time.  
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peer
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Topic:
Pick up lines
Edited by
SimplyElla
on
Thu 05/28/09 12:06 PM
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The right before my late fiancee proposed he said..
If I was to find out I was dying tomorrow to let him know because he would want to die today.. that way he would not live a day with out seeing my face and knowing he loves me. I fell in love with him all over again...  
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Topic:
Olympic Sex Life
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Wife: My hubby & I have, what he calls "olympic sex".
Friend: Wow, must be a terrific sex life? Wife: Not really. It only happens once in 4 years. |
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They are pretty much ALL overpaid. lucky bastards.  Yup, evrey one of them are overpaid
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I would hope that I would know such a thing before getting involved with them in the sort of manner...
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Topic:
Too Hot To Wear Clothes
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'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,'
Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?' 
'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied. |
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Topic:
smile
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::runs away:: |
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Topic:
.
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(((((JAS)))))
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Topic:
What are you craving
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Slurpee 
Oh man, I lived in Santa Fe until about a year ago and they didn't have 7-11. So no slurpee's. Only the far inferior slush puppies. When we moved down to Rio I was getting a slushee every day for a while. Ha ha.. That is my summer staple... After every tennis match or beach/pool visit I need one.. Nothing completes a day like that without a slurpee. 
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Topic:
Taxes
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A woman walks into a H & R Block Tax accountant's office and tells him that she needs help to file her taxes. The accountant says, 'Before we begin, I'll need to ask you a few questions.' He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. And then asks, 'What is your occupation?' 'I'm a prostitute,' she says. The H & R Block accountant is somewhat taken aback and says, 'No, No, No, that won't work. Let's try to rephrase that.' The woman says, 'OK, I'm a high-end call girl.' 'No, that still won't work. Try again.' They both think for a minute; then the woman says, 'I'm a chicken farmer.' The accountant asks, 'What does chicken farming have to do with being a prostitute?' 'Well, I raised a thousand little peckers last year.' 'Chicken Farmer it is. ' |
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Topic:
What are you craving
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Slurpee
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Sear
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Topic:
Who is YOUR Fantasy Date?
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With Vince
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beat
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Topic:
A to Z Summer Stuff
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Afternoon thunderstorms... -- hey its florida
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typeractive
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Warren
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Topic:
3 Words Only
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ALWAYS AND FOREVER
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